LeChuck's Diary

A bit of background:

I am in my mid 20s and have lost a five-figure sum since I started betting big amounts aged 18, but overall I have been betting since I was about 7! I've probably lost around £30000 now but I have completely lost count.

I am not rich. I have lost £10000 inheritance I was lucky enough to be left, and I have borrowed money from family which I have also lost. I shudder to think what I could have done with all the money I've lost.

Welcome back LeChuck.

I have to say I don't agree with your plan. It's a very similar one to you had in June, controlled gambling doesn't seem to work for many and it looks like it did for a few months for you then bets got bigger and more frequent.

You say you want to bet for fun but from what you're saying you're past that point. "When the fun stops, STOP" as a compulsive gambler like you and me "we can't win because we can't STOP"

Last time you said if it happens again you will tell your girlfriend, I hope this time you have told someone as it massively helps it makes you accountable. Get as many blocks in place as you can, hand over finances, close account SE from bookies and online accounts. Look for some external support, call gamcare get counselling find your nearest GA meeting and just turn up, read lots of diaries on here and use yours more you posted 2 or 3 times last time then disappeared.

I know it's not what you want to hear but by having the odd bet you are keeping the embers burning and eventually they will catch fire again and once a fire is lit it's hard to put out.

KTF

That plan will never work. you clearly still want to gamble.

When you are ready to address your problem there are lots of supports in place. Dont wait till your 40 to realise there is no such thing as a "fun" bet for a compulsive gambler.

Take care

Hi LeChuck , I'm afraid I'll have to get on the bandwagon as well mate sorry :((, the reason your here and that what youv'e tried before hasn't worked is that your a Compulsive Gambler and we cannot stop once we get started .

I tried for many years to gain control back with my gambling , having a few days away from it , cutting down on stakes , or just betting on one type of thing but all to no avail , it alway's ended badly by usualy doing a lot more money than if I'd stuck to the original route . I feel there's a line that gamblers cross , a point that we change from being in control when we would win a few quid and be happy and then use that money to have maybe a night out or buy something extra , to a place where it wouldn't matter how much we'd won we wouldn't walk away because it stops being about the money just that old buzz it gives us ?

I'd love to be able to control my gambling as I always enjoyed it on my own or socially , a day at the races or a night at the dogs with the family but truthfully I know My last bet was 13 months ago and if I were to walk into a bookies tommorow to gamble it wouldn't take me too long to be back in full destruction mode even if I kidded myself I would only have a fiver here or there .

Wish you well though buddy in your quest .

Alan

Thank you everyone for your replies.

I understand what you are all saying. This might not be appropriate to say when there are obviously people recovering here, but I genuinely don't think I can live without the buzz that gambling provides. If I completely stopped gambling I think I would end up turning to drugs or drink, neither of which are a problem for me now.

Surely it is possible to manage addictions?

I just want to be in a place where I can enjoy gambling without crossing that line. I went to the races on the weekend and that was fine - I brought cash only, and only what I could afford to lose, and I staked sensibly so I could still buy drinks and enjoy myself.

I did not get the 'urge', as I call it, to do any stupid bets, and I haven't had since I got back.

I have not told anyone about my latest relapse. These are the famous last words but I am giving myself one last chance. If I relapse again I will come clean and seek professional help. It will seriously damage relationships if I come out with it now so I am just not prepared to do it.

Anyway, 8 days without relapsing now. I can't say '8 days without a bet' because, like I said, I'm just not prepared to aim for a bet-free life yet! Maybe if I have children in the future my perspectives will change, but my aim for now is just to enjoy myself sensibly.

Hi. ..
I'm no professional on the subject of addiction.....other than the fact that I became addicted to online slots some 5/6 years ago. ....like most started as a bit if fun.....then...like most ended as a compulsive gambler....
Fast toward 290 days.....I'm here...gamble free....and happy....
I thought like you once or twice....
I'll just do £50....I'll just do two hours....I'll just do it on days with a y in it !
Did it work....does it work....
No....it doesn't....and i think you know that deep down....or you wouldn't have come here and updated us.....you'd be happy....playing your controlled amount / time. ....getting the buzz and walking away.....
If you really want to knock your addiction into touch....it's only going to happen if your 100 % in..
and I'm afraid that means opening up to other half. ....
Nothing terrible will happen if you don't gamble......
Nothing good will happen if you do ...
Good luck love....

Hi again , I think what your really after here is almost someone to come on and give you their blessing and say " It's ok of course you'll be able to manage your addiction " you don't want to give up so much as learn to stop losing the amount's you do when you get in that frame of mind and apologies if I'm wrong ?. I tghink like many who have tried before you it will only be a matter of time before any control you may have had when you went to the races goes flying out of the window , especially if you have a win and up go the stakes as is usually the norm .

I'm not havin go but you only have to spend a while here to find the stories of people who also felt they could control their gambling , only to read how badly that ended ! .

Best wishes though whatever you decide and we'll all be here waiting when you return :(( .

I think you have to do. What is best for you. If you want to gamble. You will anyway
I've tried controlled gambling myself and it just opened the door for the compulsive gambaler to stroll back in. Like I'd never been away. That doesn't mean it won't work for you. I guess that's for you to find out if you want?
I think you counting days is just fooling yourself.
What ever way you choose I wish you success
All the best

Thanks again for your replies.

Half-Life: that's not my aim at all. But there is a difference between being a compulsive gambler who loses more than he can afford, which is what I have been, and someone who bets reasonable amounts for fun.

Anyway, yesterday it was p1ssing it down all day and I didn't have anything to do. So I bought the Racing Post and picked out a Scoop 6 and did a 50p yankee. I lost but really enjoyed my afternoon, and I was not tempted to try and chase my losses of £7.50 in the evening. So as far as I'm concerned I am doing well and have not relapsed to how I was betting before.

From what you have said you should have taken that £7.50 and gave it to those u owe out money too mate.

It's you're diary, but u are hooked and its only a matter of time before you lose big time. Find a new hobby that is far far less destructive.

I am a CG and my partner likes the odd bet on the horses - really not interested in the horses me, never have been. It's the online slots that have ruined me. But the fact that you are just reducing the amount you play isn't dealing with your addiction, the temptation to gamble is still there. I won't let my guard down, with my fella, he's in control as part of my recovery I have excluded myself from every online site i could find, so I cannot play from my own account....so he adds funds to the account and places the bets for us 50p E/W!!! I don't know if u have anyone that can do that for you too? It means that u can still get the buzz u want but it's controlled because your addiction isn't controlling it.

I wish u well on your journey.

Thats great, for you. Id rather not hear about your fun bets as gambling for the majority on this site ceased to be fun along time ago

It's quite clear from your post's that giving up gambling's just not your intention and that really all your after is away to control your gambling ?

You did a 50p E/w yankee and lost £7.50 , you say you stopped and didn't have the urge to chase it ? Well that's it then isn't it ! , Your Cured mate ?

Whatever brought you here dissapeared completely , bleedin amazing I'd say ? .

Just one final thought though ? , that post you put up just over 3 weeks ago saying how a £ 5 bet had turned into a few thousand , No , Sorry, never mind , Couldn't possibly happen again could it ???????????????????????????????????????