Filling the gambling void?

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Jamiesc93
(@jamiesc93)
Posts: 35
Topic starter
 

Has anyone here that has completely managed to overcome this addiction have any advice on how to fill the void that is left without gambling? I’ve relapsed plenty of times and it’s been mainly down to not having something to do instead of gambling, I can’t replace the quick hits of dopamine or adrenaline gambling gives me and I know I’ll struggle to match that but any suggestions of what I can replace my time with? I’ve tried gym etc and just doesn’t cut it need help if possible 

 
Posted : 13th October 2019 11:28 pm
cardhue
(@cardhue)
Posts: 839
 

i believe a limitation of gym work, as a focus of recovery, is that it’s all still a focus on the internal.

yes it’s healthy, but it’s all about you against yourself, and in its own way solitary, like gambling.

Given that your addiction is most likely, at core, about how you relate to others and yourself, I would advise engaging in something which will involve connecting with others in a meaningful way - but also in a different setting from normal.

something to take you out of your comfort zone and which makes you adapt differently to a changed environment.

a bit abstract I know. But can you think of something a bit of you has always quite fancied doing but put off as unrealistic (scared)? Now could be the time...

 
Posted : 14th October 2019 7:58 am
(@oranje01)
Posts: 195
 

Learn a foreign language. I found a free app that has a league and points system. I like it because its competitive and rewards progress with a points system. Of course It’s nothing like gambling, however after 90 days I’m getting good at it and the rewards give me that subtle dopamine fix to continue practicing. Not saying it will work for everyone but it helped me. It’s worth a try...

also thanks for posting this question! Im interested to see what is working for others?

This post was modified 5 years ago by Oranje01
 
Posted : 14th October 2019 11:13 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Hi

After years thinking about this I believe that we already had a huge void in our lives that we filled with the drug of gambling. Its crazy how that feeling can control us but control us it did. It controlled me for 40 years and I am now firmly focused that it caused me nothing but misery

So abstention from gambling means we have to face who we are and why nothing seemed preferable to gambling. Thats a big question to handle and it takes time.

This takes focus that nothing was really on offer but deluded dopamine fixes. It was never an income scheme and the gambling dens learned ages ago that the gambling feeling could be cynically twisted and bottled for our consumption. We all know what that feeling is and its powerful enough to change and completely alter minds

There are wholesome and fun things to do so why didnt we do them. My personal reason is that I lacked motivation as Ive been a depressive most of my life.

Not everything appeals but maybe thats natural. I have never liked the idea of clubs or activities that seem forced upon me. I will find my way and do things I like. I do a lot of things on my own but Im working on that. Im sociable in the right circumstances...not the wrong ones

So I know that some of your activities must now be about finding yourself again and you have to take yourself out of a comfort zone and go and do something that gives you some time to think deeply maybe in a spiritual way.

I do know that I didnt really need gambling in my life. Im much happier gamble free and I now have money which is almost still a shock to me.

Nobody says that being gamble free will whisk you off  to the land of milk and honey but I can have holidays now so I'm getting there 🙂

Best wishes to everyone on the forum

This post was modified 5 years ago by Joydivider
 
Posted : 14th October 2019 2:18 pm
(@spendlikewater84)
Posts: 108
 

Get a pet.  It will give you the opportunity to distract yourself by taking the dog out on walks etc.  Take up a new hobby or do some volunteering.  Do something that will make a difference and make you feel good, this will release endorphins.... The happy hormones and give you a hit you've been craving.

Put the money you were going to spend on gambling in a bank accou t.  Once a month treat yourself.  

Be kind to yourself 🙂 

 
Posted : 14th October 2019 2:20 pm
(@givemethebuzz)
Posts: 174
 

there is nothing really that fills the void , perhaps some adrenaline type experience like rock climbing or snowboarding or paragliding may come close but nothing as easily accessible as gambling is

there is a caveat to this and that is there is nothing on this earth that can provide a faster downer than gambling

the amount of times I've loaded £200 into an online casino lost 15 hands within 15 minutes dealer talking about some rubbish and I feel like ive lost the will to live

also that feeling of loading deposit after deposit and praying you get a win just to break even

no thanks

 

 
Posted : 14th October 2019 2:29 pm
Xenedra
(@xenedra)
Posts: 181
 

I have to say, this is one of the hardest things I have found of recovery. Especially after the initial buzz of fighting the addiction wears off and you settle in to ‘this is my life now’. I’m in a routine with money now, paying bills, I started horse riding again (I love it) but it’s not the same. I miss gambling. On dark days I even miss the adrenaline of loosing all my money. Messed up isn’t it. But it’s true. Iv watched every box set on very tv subscription, Iv read all the books I own and bought several more and read them, I went to the gym (I’m no good at that lol) , I saved up money and went on two holidays and saved up and booked a third for November. Yup, all good, all distractions in the moment but long term...I miss gambling. I miss winning, I miss the escape, I miss four or even five figure withdrawals to replace the money  I lost only to loose it again. I even miss the adrenaline of the bank threatening to close my account for either too many deposits or the Constant bouncing of direct debits. Nothing does the same for me as gambling, not drinking, not smoking (I actually quit smoking during the height of my gambling, go figure!), not s*x not rock and roll. 
But, life is better now, different but better. I’m normal now, go to work, pay bills, spend time with the family, have money for a magazine and a Costa whenever I want. Heck, I can even put petrol in the car in the middle of the month. I suppose I’m trying to say, I feel ya, I know what your feeling, I know we should feel grateful, elated, blessed we no longer gamble. But in realty, some days there is nothing else I’d rather be doing! 

xenedra 

 
Posted : 14th October 2019 8:13 pm
(@alkynat)
Posts: 44
 

For me I have found downloading games on my phone helps, I play games that offer challenges and collections to complete.  I've noticed though I obsess on them almost as much as gambling... I think for me it is less a void I am trying to fill but my head I am trying to escape from. I always gamble most in times of high stress and I think it gives me something else to think about or makes it easier to avoid thinking about something else. When I gamble and lose I create a new stress, I then spend my time agonizing over the money I lost etc. But I think it's often preferable to agonizing some of my life problems to which I have no choice over... I think the answer for me (and probably others) is to actually face the root of the problem and the things we are trying to avoid by gambling... I'm not quite ready for that yet though..

 
Posted : 14th October 2019 10:08 pm
Jamiesc93
(@jamiesc93)
Posts: 35
Topic starter
 

Thanks for the comments guys really appreciate it nearly a week gamble free AGAIN and really hitting me hard and determined to beat this for the sake of my relationship my family and myself but really struggling with the filling the void thing, I’m looking into new hobby’s etc but has anyone tried medication for cases of overwhelmed reward and dopamine systems? Antidepressants? Or is the best way just getting through it and letting your brain heal?

 
Posted : 17th October 2019 6:52 pm

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