The Gambling Establishments never make me do anything I did not want to do. The Gambling Establishments never lied to me, I lied to myself. The Gambling Establishments never caused me pain, I caused myself pains and lots of suffering..

Hi

How many people think that if they get to be rich that they are therefore successful.

I asked a rich man one day if he was connect that he was a rich man.

He answered me did I think that his only goal was to get rich.

No explained it was his goal to be successful by his actions and his words and the consequences of him being  was wealth.

It is very sad that the gambling addiction recovery is one of the lowest of all addictions.

On my starting to escape to the slot machines and the gambling was just the symptoms that I was emotionally vulnerable.

I got to understand that the word recovery means healing for me, in time I would heal the hurt inner child in me who use to live in so many fears.

Now I understand that living in fear is a very unhealthy thing to do.

Because of all the painful horrific pains and experiences emotionally physically and sexually I learned  not to trust people and to live in fear an in mistrust.

By going to more and more meetings I heard some very deep healthy therapies.

Talking about the past some people say it is blame thing, no by talking about it and having a voice I learn to no longer be the victim.

In the recovery programme I learned to speak up for myself, to give my hurt inner child a voice.

I took inventory of everything that was done to me that was painful and traumatic and today know that I am a survivor in so many ways. 

You will often hear people say that you have to do this or have to do that.

 By my saying "I have to" implies that I do things resentfully or reluctantly.

So in time my wording and my actions changed to need to do things or want to do things.

Once in recovery some time it was apparent that there was an emotional age did not match up to my physical age.

By working my recovery this emotional gap reduced as my hurt inner child healed.

Humbling ourself to the recovery program sounded like belittling to our self.

In truth we humble ourself to be an equal to all people in recovery.

Anger Aggression Rage Guilt Shame tells us that we have not healed our pains.

Having to keep lying indicates that we not healed our pains and not reduced our fears.

Emotional triggers for me my were pains I could not heal, an emotional trigger were my were fears I could not face and reduce, an emotional trigger were my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I could reduce, an emotional trigger were my fears of emotional intimacy and feeling a loner and disconnected, an emotional trigger for me was boredom because I could feel productive and I was not able to commit to my needs my wants and in time set goals for me to achieve.

It takes time to understand all of our unhealthy emotional triggers.

In my life today I am able to interact with all people in healthy ways.

How long does it take to heal the hurt inner child in us.

The time it takes to heal is all up to us.

The recovery program very much pushes religion on people, sadly a person can find a healthier life without addictions being religious or not.

Yet our guilt and shame is the consequences of having a healthy conscience.

By becoming much healthier people we no longer will go against our healthy conscience.

Any recovery programme is a life saver if we work at it and start to value our lives.

Healing Love and Peace to everyone.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham