He’s gambling yet again!

I'm so sorry that you have been hurt so much by your partner again. You have done *nothing* to deserve it. You sound like you have been amazingly patient and forgiving towards him, and a rock for your young family. He doesn't sound like he is ready to prioritise your family, please take all the steps you can to protect yourself and your kids (emotionally and financially).

I can understand the disappointment you feel about your birthday and that you may be reluctant or unable to spend any money on yourself now. The sun will be shining this weekend and you deserve a lovely day with your little ones. Happy birthday xx

My partner did the exact same thing to me, he earned alot more than I did and put me in the same situation however we don’t have children. But the birthday situation he did the exact same thing, my partner has been clean for 3 months now because I hit a breaking point and gave him the option to leave and do what he wants or to let me help him stop

All his bills were being missed and he was borrowing money left right and centre 

You can’t just block unfortunately there is a way around getting onto sites that aren’t registered to this country 

my partner agreed to all the following terms and it actually stopped him : 1. to blocking him off all sites and all bookies in 50mile radius it took hours, 2. aswell as that he isn’t allowed to use cash cause he might give it to someone to do it for him (he had an issue with bookies and slots), 3. he handed over his bank details which I have access to 24/7 and I know all the websites now from his transaction history 4. doesn’t have a card now either so he can’t register to new sites, we agreed 3 months ago if this doesn’t work he will lose all financial freedom and won’t have any access to his bank 5.I have access to his phone bill and changed the parental control on it to a child so he couldn’t access over 18 sites on his phone ( it does work connected to WiFi but he couldn’t do it around me) 

At first you come off as the worst constantly questioning but my partner has thanked me in the end cause no one else managed to force him to stop 

The last thing I would check is if he’s gambling online in your name, my partner signed up in my name and his moms name on 

That's so sad for you and  it's not fair . I did the same things to my partner and still feel so bad what I put him through but he is a good man and he has stood by me as he knows I never want to gamble again and I really hope your partner will reach that point of acceptance that this is an addiction and it's not just affecting him it's affecting you .   It took me two years of denial that there was any problem. I convinced myself that I didn't have a problem and then I would have a win which would lead on to more loses . I thought I was in control it was the opposite. I was so afraid to tell him and so ashamed but will never forget how upset he was the day I stopped and confessed everything I was at the end of my tether and didn't want to live but God Bless him he stood by me. He also laid down a new set of rules. He wasn't even upset that I lost all the money we had he was upset because I had lied to him. I remember crying when he took my phone off me and my bank cards but it was the best thing he ever done for me. 58 days later and I'm feeling so grateful for his love and support everyday .He has also put me back in charge of finances and I have saved a good bit of the money I lost and we are going on holiday in July.  hopefully you can work out what's best for you and your kids and partner and protect yourself from any more financial harm and get some support behind you .  Mary