My partner has a long term gambling problem which they admit to.
they are seeking counselling and I am trying my hardest to support them.
However they keep doing it once every week or so and are spending 500-3000 a session.
financially they are in a terrible situation, the only saving grace for me at the moment is that we are not living together so his finances do not directly affect me.
we have tried self exclusion, net nannies and monitoring bank accounts but there is always a way around these things if you try hard enough.
I can't run away altogether as we have a child together however if I keep being kind and trying to support him as I have been doing it's clearly not going to improve.
i gave him an ultimatum 2 weeks ago that he would lose me if it happened again and he has said since that me saying that has kept him from doing it.
This morning I discover he has done another £2000.
he doesn't know I know yet - what do I do? I'm terrified that if I leave him he'll spiral even worse and he has mentioned suicidal thoughts before. But if I keep putting up with it will it ever stop?
Hi Lfh
Those solutions you've looked at so far are the mild ones.
Compulsive gambling if its a real problem in a person's life is not just simply a case of not betting. I could no more just not bet than i could not breathe. Has he looked into counselling or gone somewhere like GA?
Please look into gambling addiction before you cut things off completely.
"Has he looked into counselling or gone somewhere like GA?"
Yes he is having counselling who have apparently advised him to go to GA meetings when he's finished with them.
i don't want to give up on him but so many things I've read online say to walk away as it will never get better - I'm not sure how long I can take it for any more.
Hi Lookingforhope
I think you should check to make sure that you aren't liable for any of his debts. It wouldn't be the first time that a partner has discovered that they were liable, even though they knew nothing about it.
Yes it can get better, but only if he is wanting to stop gambling and willing to put procedures in place to help him stop gambling. At the moment all I can see are halfe-hearted meaasures. He has to get serious.
Take care
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