Husband gambling 2 small children

My husband is a gambler and generally bad with money. A couple of years ago whilst pregnant with my second born I was blindsided & found out he’d gambled so much that he hadn’t paid rent or bills, we got the car taken off us & he went behind my back asking my family for money. The lies he told broke my heart, it’s was like he was emotional switched off. I was heavily pregnant on tears begging for the truth and the lies just piled up. I chose to stay with him for the kids. We both had separate councelling and he said he’s banned himself. He sent me statements and things for a while but that fizzled out. I’ve not been able to trust him since and I am incredibly hurt but I’ve tried to do some work on that and work on our marriage. 

Recently they’ve been some red flags and I had a feeling he may have been in trouble again. He continued to lie, tell me he couldn’t gamble and that it’s in my head. Turns out my gut was right, he’s been gambling again and blown all his wage in a few days and not paid rent or bills. I’ve managed to find some money to pay the rent thankfully but I’ve ended up getting into debt to do it. We have two small children and I don’t understand why he would risk them being homeless. I also don’t have any money for Christmas presents. I’m heartbroken. I know he is only human and half expected a relapse but this doesn’t feel like a one off mistake - this feels like he’s been gambling again for months, lying, scheming and jeopardizing our futures and the kids. He has only come clean because he had too and he had no more money to win the rent back. I’ve asked him for full transparency and to check his online banking and accounts. He’s outright refused and said he will not, he’s said he will send me statements but not sure me his phone which I think is a red flag? I gave him an ultimatum and he said he would have to sleep on it. 

I have always shown compassion and tried not to shame him, I’ve tried to be understanding and always thought he was a good person just making bad decision. Now I just have this gut renching feeling he’s a narcissist and maybe I’ve been living in an emotional abusive marriage. The lies he tells me are incomprehensible and he would literally have me begging and in floods of tears and still bare lie to my face. Whenever I have asked him for proof or to make phones calls/ show me he has always turned it around me and said I’m being unfair and he feels uncomfortable.

I just feel heartbroken and also worried for my children - where do I go next? I’m no worried about next month rent. He says he’s being truthful now but I can’t help but feel I’m only scratching the surface.