This is my first post, I dont usually like to talk about my problems but am at a bit of a loss. Im due to get married soon and eveything is arranged and paid for but I've recently found out my partner has a gambling problem and I'm crushed, not because he has a problem but how deep and long the lies have been going on, I though I knew him but now I'm not sure and I'm under a huge amout of pressure to continue with the wedding as "I should be supporting him". But the lies just never stop and just when I think there cant possibly be more I find out about somthing else. I could cope if he came clean but he never does I always have to catch him out then I end up getting the blame because I make him feel guilty. Its all just such a mess and I just feel so lost....
Hello rose 84,
Welcome to the forum. You are about to make a life commitment to your partner and it is important that your life together is based in honesty. It sounds like he has a gambling addiction but he is not able to own up to it and deal with it. He would need a lot of help when he decides to open up and you could support him with his recovery but until he shows signs that he is dealing with his problem you would need to first protect yourself from the effects of gambling.
I would recommend that you contact GamCare and discuss this with an advisor who can arrange a referral to 1-2-1 counselling. You may need to explore what is going on between you and your partner and start sorting out the “mess”. You can support him but you do not have to put up with lies and dishonesty.
Best wishes,
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