Hello everyone!
I made a post late last year about how I was done with gambling and how bad it is and how much I was commited to stopping and I did well.... For a while.
I remember how awful I felt when I lost the last of my money to the bookies and felt like I was the worst person in the world! I quite easily managed to persuade myself to have a small bet on the footie because Obviously a small bet won't do any harm (how stupid of me to think that) and anyway here I am 4 or 5 months later still gambling, still losing and ready to give it another shot! I found myself trying to log in to online accounts that are banned and just thought to myself WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!????
I can see myself going down the same road I have been down many times before and I don't like it one bit!
May I add I haven't lost everything this time I just realise that what I am doing is bad and will only have one outcome,
sorry for the long post guys but I feel relieved that I am writing this and making the right changes to make a better me!!
H.
Hi, Harry,
I've re-read your previous threads and interesting as they are, there has thus far been total silence from you about putting blocks and barriers into place. So it's not surprising that you're still gambling.
The standard advice is to break the time money location triangle, take one away and you can't bet. If you can get your OH to manage your money, pay your wages into her account and have her drip feed cash as required, that will make a real difference. Self exclude, block devices, downgrade your mobile or get proper IT advice about blocking it. Ditch your Visa card and have a basic cash card only.
Most importantly, when you can, go to GA meetings, get the external support. There may be support from your employer, you're not the only member of your profession to have this problem.
But if you're on leave with your wages in your account and relying on your own willpower, then you'll gamble.
Make those changes, for you.
BW,
CW
Hi CW I have tried to hand money over to OH but find it difficult because because we don't live together, I have banned myself from all online betting services and have told my Mrs that we are going to self exclude from the shops when I get home, I am already self excluded from the ones around my base so I can't gamble here. Hopefully taking away all options to gamble will make the urges go away in time! I have my driving test on Thursday and have just booked a couple of days away in the Lake District for next month so I have some stuff to look forward to! 🙂
I hope you are enjoying your weekend, I am third day in a row duty and it is extremely rubbish haha
H.
Hi Harry,
Well done for posting and keep strong. I'm ex military and used to gamble when bored. Was 2 years clean and relapsed yesterday, so back at Day 1. We can kick this.
Hi, Harry,
Handing over financial control may be harder when you live apart but it's not impossible. Parents do it, for example for a gambling child away at uni. Your wages could be paid to her and she could make weekly or bi-weekly transfers. Even daily if need be.
Would suggest a rethink of blocks and barriers to keep the triangle broken - more is better than less, at least at the start.
Good luck with driving and the Lakes.
CW
Hello Harry
Welcome back.
Going down the small bet road will take you to the same place. It's a well-travelled road, been there myself more than a few times.
Any bet - however small - comes with the huge risk of descending us back into the thick of addiction. A small bet isn't worth the big risk.
Make changes, learn from mistakes, stick with what works and you'll firmly be on the road to recovery.
Destination: better you.
Best wishes
Glint
Hi Harry and welcome back , I just want to mirror what CW said to you , my sons at uni and struggled with finances , not gambling related but just in general , so instead of him having access to a large amount of funds in his account , such as when his grant goes in , he pays it into my account and I drip feed it to him when required and it definately works .
Sometimes stopping gambling and more importantly staying stopped is a bit like undertaking a big DIY project , have a plan , do the preparation and have the right tools at hand , its not rocket science but a bit of forward thinking will stop you wrecking your house ?.
All the best buddy !
Cheers for all the encouragement guys it's nice to be back on the forum, i think it's all about knowing what you want from your money instead of seeing it as a thing that just comes and goes every month. See that's my biggest problem id think to myself ahh don't worry I get paid again soon which is completely the wrong way to look at it! Now I'm thinking more along the lines of well I'm gonna need to buy a car and I want to go on holiday this year. These things are going to take priority over gambling for sure!
H.
Sorry, Harry, but I disagree. I think it's about you understanding what gambling gives you, why that need arises and non-addictive ways of meeting it. Anything else ignores the fact of your compulsion to gamble.
CW
Hi Harry I am a CG and although I haven't gambled for 102 days I will always be a CG. That will never go away it's how you manage it. As CW said in her last post you need to deal with the problem. Thinking of what you can do with your money is only really masking the real problem. It is an addiction that some with will power alone can deal with but very few as its too easy to relapse. If you truly want to give up and understanding that you have already relapsed you will put as many blocks in place....such as ones both CW and Alan have mentioned above. Read lots of the diaries in the recovery section and you will hopefully gain some useful tips and advice.
Good luck with you recovery
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