Could really use extra support though don't deserve it

Hi Lulubobs , Look you can have all the support you want from everyone on here and that's unconditional but as you rightly pointed out the only person who can stop this is you , blocks and exclusions all work but to a point and if your going to go and Search out sites that your not barred from then there's no point in having them , I came here 13 months ago after a lifetime of gambling and was commited to changing my life for the better , I havent gambled in all that time yet I've still had access to cash and cards and no blocks on my laptop or phone , I self excluded frome all the bookies and casinos near me but if I wanted to gamble I only need a short drive to another area and there's the difference unlike you I choose not to gamble anymore ! .

It's not Rocket science but you have to decide what you want more , To gamble or not to gamble ? , lifes never ever going to change unless you make those changes and accept gamblings beat you and you simply have to choose a different way of finding the excitement you get from it .

Tio be honest , you need to think about installing some really good blocking software or better still speak to your internet provider about having parental controls where there is no access to over 18 sites , downgrade any smartphones to a housbrick that just makes calls and txts if thats what you need to do , in fact anything that closes as many doors as possible !

You originally came here because you'd lost money and couldn't control your gambling yet you go and do the same thing again it's crazy ? . I think you need to sit down and think long and hard if your ready to give up and if you decide yes then let all the past go , let go of all the losses and tell yourself there not coming back , if you do that and really accept it then there's no reason to keep chasing what youve lost and it dragging you back into the cycle of gambling again ?.

I'm sorry if you think I'm being harsh but it's the only way your going to wake up to what gambling does to us all , look for outside help if you can't manage alone , through Gamcare or GA , there's always other options .

Don't beat yourself up over this , whats done is done and now it's about putting things in place to make sure it becomes better from now on :))

I wish you well for now

Alan x

How many times have you been here before ?

Think about the way you feel now. Depressed, ashamed, lonely.

These are the traits of gambling. Before you log into a laptop, mobile phone, or walk into a bookies, casino, arcade. The way you feel now is how every single one of those episodes will end. Only you know how this makes you feel and only you can be the one to stop it.

If you decide that you will not gamble, then don't! If you don't want to gamble because you have spent all your money, then maybe you don't really want to stop.

Make a decision and stand by it. Everyday remind yourself of that decision and if you faulted remember that you are going end up skint and feeling like you do now, time and time again

Hello!

Welcome to the forum. I think the advice above is great.......but do you truly want to stop?

The support her is amazing but gambling throws so many things at you aside from money lost. I look at the opportunity cost of gambling. Yes, financially the cost is huge, but the mental cost, the affect on others is too much of a negative to make me continue.

Gambling will stay with us for life. The ability to manage it is in our control. The choice is ultimately ours. I can't have a small bet because I know I will get the bug and keep doing it. But I can't do it for the mental and family reasons around me. I want to be a better person for those around me so don't. That strength and support here has got me to 250 something days and now I hate gambling in all forms.

It's your choice. Support is always available but look at the other effects. The opportunity cost of not gambling is more money, a better life and less stress! The terrible feelings subside, trust me! But you will never win even if you win at gambling! An evil, evil thing!

You can do this! 🙂 Abet

Thank you everyone for your posts. Yes I do truly want to stop and I also appreciate the tough talking. I have self excluded and blocked now totally there isn't anyway I can gamble now. A return.... thanks too for telling me the terrible feelings will eventually go because I've been putting off feeling bad and living with the losses I've had even though I end up feeling twice, ten times as bad after gambling. I'm so serious about this I need to feel more positivity about my life too. This time I'm not suicidal yet more determined you'd think that being suicidal would be enough to stop me but I think it was when I realised I had to stop and couldn't 'escape' any more. This time I'm trying to be more positive about the good things that not gambling will bring and being free from a horrendous addiction. Thank you everyone for your time posting

Just take one day at a time.

At some point you will have to accept that you cannot gamble again.

For now don't think about forever, just take one day at a time.

Wake up tomorrow and promise yourself that you will not gamble today. That's it. Resist any urges, distract yourself by coming on here and reading and posting. Slowly your finances will get better and the urge to gamble will slowly fade.

I recommend the Allan Carr how to quit gambling book. It helps you change your way of thinking about gambling.

For me, I decided that I was done with gambling. I can't beat any of the systems available to us, and trying to simply drained my finances. Basically gambling is pointless. If you can convince yourself of this, it becomes easier.

To stop gambling benefits your life and everyone around you. What's the point ?

Good luck and stay strong

Thanks Alan just read your post again twice yes I'm making the choice to not gamble ever again and this time I'm going to do it. Your advice on letting all the losses go is good I need to do that properly yes it's beat me time to say goodbye for good thanks Alan x

Thanks 2124 that's some really good advice thank you I'm finally ready to quit for good and it will definitely help taking one day at a time which I haven't done before and this time I will be thank ful that I've not gambled instead of 'wanting' to I don't know if I make sense but I mean it this time basically I'll be reading yours and all the posts and ones from before everyday it most definitely helps and I'm truly 'listening ' this time thank you

Hi again Lulubobs :)) , Nobody said it would be easy right ? If it was there'd be no need for this place , therapy GA and everybook that's ever been written on Compulsive Gambling , in fact it's bloody hard to give up something thats been such a big part of our lives for so long , what started out as fun eventually for all of us turned into our worst nightmare ,It's a drug which gives us a buzz win or lose and just like any other drug we get withdrawl symptoms and that's what you have to fight as 21246 said Just one day at a time is the only way forward , even an hour at a time if things get really bad , the important thing is that you don't give in , you fight and fight until those day's turn into weeks then months then years ,

When I came here all I'd ever managed was a couple of days at the most and I couldn't really ever see myself breaking free but one day at a time I pushed forward to a point now over a year later the urges have all but dissappeared , the longer you go the easier it gets , I promise :))

You can so do this and like me sometimes we just need a good kick up the a**e to get started :))

xx

it's

Ok time to start a post in recovery section I'm moving on from new one to being seriously in recovery thank you everyone you've all helped so much

Hi Alan just reading through posts again and saw your last one which I missed before, thank you it's helped me with urges I'm having today and reminder to take one day at a time

Lulubobs1966 wrote:

Hi everyone I'm ashamed to say gambled after all support received too. I'm so very sad that I can't seem to control this illness but this time I've really done it just can't go on I'm ruining my life. I've done. Please anyone any support would be amazing what is wrong with me? I don't want to ruin my life any more words of wisdom please gratefully received

Hi so sad reading your post it's as if your reading my thoughts ..i too have a gambling problem .. I have been here too many times,
nothing has changed im still a looser ..I have no idea why I gamble or what's wrong with me ..this may not be the last time you try to quit ..but don't stop trying ..I'm in mess at present ..This may not be my last attempt at being gamble free but this time i know it will be my Best shot .
Don't give up .

Lulubobs1966 wrote:

Hi everyone I'm ashamed to say gambled after all support received too. I'm so very sad that I can't seem to control this illness but this time I've really done it just can't go on I'm ruining my life. I've done. Please anyone any support would be amazing what is wrong with me? I don't want to ruin my life any more words of wisdom please gratefully received

Hi so sad reading your post it's as if your reading my thoughts ..i too have a gambling problem .. I have been here too many times,
nothing has changed im still a looser ..I have no idea why I gamble or what's wrong with me ..this may not be the last time you try to quit ..but don't stop trying ..I'm in mess at present ..This may not be my last attempt at being gamble free but this time i know it will be my Best shot .
Don't give up .

Hi Lesley I've started a recovery diary in recoveries section hope your ok, don't you give up either we can do it x

Hey again,

I hope you are feeling better and starting to cobble together a good recovery plan! Apologies if I came across a bit tough love, but sometimes we just need to hear it! It's a struggle, and it's tough, but when you've tamed gambling it's worth it. See every day not gambling as the start of a new future and cut out ALL opportunities to gamble. It really is a day at a time thing. Keep posting, if you get urges come here. Read around. But remember it takes a lot of courage to come here, admit a problem and face it head on. Kudos to you!

All the best!