Finally giving up

Dear Onepunchjamoo

We're sorry you're feeling so low. We understand you feel hopeless right now, and you don't seem to believe that recovery is possible for you. We - and others on the forum - continue to believe both in recovery and in you. We hope that in time you see this and start to reach out to us. We are going to email you directly.

Forum Admin

Onepunchjamoo wrote:

I'm giving up trying to fix things. I've quit my job, I'm no longer in a relationship and I'm ignoring loan companies, I'm fed up and tired, I'm just going to lie in bed almost all day every day and whatever happens, happens. My mind is corrupted beyond repair, I'll cause less stress and damage if I just stay in bed. I won't be able to gamble either because I won't have money so maybe after enough time I'll get over it but I doubt it.

Hi Onepunchjamoo

Thanks for posting, no matter how bad you feel right now, you will be able to feel better, even though you're initial thought will be to disbelieve what I have just said. Please go to the GP to talk about depression, and get yourself to a GA meeting. I stopped gambling in March 2016, after very nearly killing myself, I know the lows that gambling takes you to, but I also know that recovery is possible.

GamRecovery

Just for today I will not gamble, one day at a time.

Wise words, I hope Jammo listen to it.

Hi jamoo

I’ve read a couple of your posts and I understand where your at…..you feel like everything’s ontop of you but trust me burying your head in the sand and ignoring all your problems wont help

Ive been where you are , Ive struggled to find 2 quid for a cup of coffee and ive had to hide in the toilets of trains to get to work

i often felt like just giving up .....but what would that mean ? I just end up sat in my parents’ house all day spiralling into the depths of depression watching everything around me crumble

remember nothing lasts forever it took me 2-3 years to sort things out and I pretty much stopped gambling all together for a year or so , but in that period I found my current girlfriend whos probably the best thing to ever happen to me , we now live a modest life together in our rented house and are planning to go travelling In the near future she’s fully aware of my problem with gambling and although she struggles to understand it , it helps to have someone to keep me in check

im not going to pretend ive had a “perfect recovery” because I haven’t I still do football bets with varying success and I’m still working on myself to this day

I don’t think anyone ever fully recovers from a gambling addiction once you have that demon it will always be in you …..how you deal with the demon is your decision some decide total abstinence is the only option personally counting down days and living in fear for the rest of my life isn’t for me

But In saying that neither are FOBTs & online gaming which in my opinion are both fixed so I wont play them out of principal ……I used to visit land casinos regularly when I was younger but since I got with my mrs and moved out of the city I rarely have the time to go to one which is good because you can lose a lot of money very quickly ……I primarily only bet on football now which satisfies the demon and some months provides a good supplementary income, others a loss some months Im even

In my journey I learnt I am a chancer by nature it’s a part of who I am , like you I get very bored living life in its normal confines il always want to take some sort of risk in life and I have to appreciate not every decision is going to be the right one I’ve accepted I have to take the good with the bad by living like this that’s my decision

In saying that I know how bad things can get and that serves as a warning to me that sometimes I just need to take step back from it all and clear my mind

Always remember The worst type of gambler is a desperate gambler

in your case you are very desperate and saying your on the verge of bankruptcy so gambling is not the way out of your situation as you cannot think clearly

im sorry to tell you but the only answer here is long hard graft , apologise to your girlfriend and explain the mess your in , ring your creditors and explain the situation because I promise you they would much rather small token amounts when you can afford them rather than force you into bankruptcy where they won’t get a penny

forget about quitting your job , It sounds like you may need to work 3 to sort this mess out and once you’ve sorted the mess out and got some money in the bank then you can decide if you want to have another bash at gambling who knows after doing a lot of of 60hr weeks and you start to appreciate the work that goes into earning money you may not want too

Many on here will disagree with my way of looking at it but where you have failed to recognise all the other generic advice perhaps mine will resonate with you

Things can & will get better if you allow them too

Great post. Glad you're able to only gamble a little too, nice to see someone that doesn't think never gambling at all is the answer.
Things are ok with my gf but I've quit my job, it's over. I may try call amigo and see if they can wait.
The more I work the worse I feel when I lose it all.. I was doing 48 hour weeks and then to just lose it devastated me.. I'm at a dead end right now, I can't afford anything. I need to go into work and fill something in to get my holiday pay then that's it.. I'm sure in a few month it'll pan out, I'm in a better mood. If it takes me ages to reply it's because all my posts have to be reviewed first and it usually takes at least a day, how very helpful.

To be honest it breaks my heart when I see you coming back and with same results man.. I hope you grab one healthy thought some day and you stand for it... It took me so long to decide whether change is possible or not... I thought that its too late.. I have ruined my reputation, I have ruine my life with gambling.. I dont appreciate the simple things in life, the value of the actually hard earned money... But my mind is reprograming everyday.. its difficult.. I had days where I wouldnt leave the house, had no motivation.. but I came to realise that its not possible to be always motivated but its all about discipline and character.. I hope you get better buddy, wish you all the best, keep in touch

the dude

Could you find more work ? I don’t know where you live but I know distribution warehouses like amazon etc are usually hiring loads of casual workers at this time of year

Its pretty monotonous work but you can’t use your phone for the duration of your shift and by the time you finish you will be too tired to think about gambling

They pay pretty good wage and overtime will be plentiful before Christmas

Good to know things are ok with the GF and give amigo a call and tell them you’ve got no job and they’ll have to wait I wouldn’t worry too much about your credit rating , ive been in an IVA for nearly 4 years now (that means 0 credit ) cant even get some bank accounts lol

There’s this big hoo-ha in our society about how bad your life will be if you don’t keep your credit score in good health

It’s a load of rubbish the banks only want us to have credit so we are locked into paying it back with interest for the rest of our lifes its how they make they’re money

I know people who are still paying for nights out & presents they bought last Christmas seems absurd to me ,My life has actually got 100X better since I got rid of all the credit cards & loans

as far as the actual gambling itself goes I would definitely recommend knocking it on the head for at least 6 months because its incredibly difficult to turn consistent profit off gambling even when you have a good staking plan and money to spare I often have to remind myself its IMPOSSIBLE to win all the time , work your socks off through the rest of this winter and give your finances & cineworld card a chance to recover

Give yourself a target of say £500 to save then give it to your girlfriend to keep safe then rinse & repeat

Not heard much from you recently Jamoo, how are you getting on bud??

You said you'd quit your job last time, have you found anything else?? Have you managed to completely abstain from gambling whilst you've had no money??

Hope your okay and that your slowly getting yourself in a better place mate.