Hello all
new to this so don’t know where to write.
I have been on here a week now, reading everyone’s stories & it hit home to me. I had been gambling every day for 3 years. I am 40 years old. I never even thought about gambling before this. I gambled till I had no money left even if I won big I would just play till it was all gone. I would spend all my wages on it after my bills were paid. I wound then lie to borrow money, get loans to gamble, lock myself in a room for days to gamble, wake up in the middle of the night and place bets. I won big last week then the next day lost it all, & then my own money, trying to win it back. Gambling had taken control of my life for the past 3 years & I finally come clean to my partner & broke down. I am now blocked for all sites online thanks to contacting gamcare. Bookmakers was never a problem as never went in them but online gambling pulled me in without me realising I had got myself an addiction. I decided enough was enough, as the money lost over the years I could have nearly paid a house off. It’s only been a short time of me not gambling but I never thought it would be this hard as obviously my days was filled with gambling at home & work. I keep myself busy & if I get that urge in my brain telling me to gamble I come on here & read stories for half hour & then that urge has gone. New year new start, save money, enjoy holidays with my partner & my family. Crazy how I would always moan about how much that or this cost but would spend grands gambling. Makes me feel sick even thinking about it. I will never give them bloodsucking companies another pound. Gambling put me though hell not just with money, or my self respect but the lies I would tell just so I could gamble. Gambling companies I can say I am done with you. I thought to myself life is to short wasting your time doing this, gambling would make me feel ill & the thoughts that went through my head I never want to fill them again. Worse addiction gambling is. The silent killer.
You can also decide that come what may this will not kill you. We are habitual beings. We do things on repeat 80% of our time without thinking about it and our brains are not even designed to stop habits without huge and great effort. Our fight or flight brain can only handle so much data then our subconscious takes over as that has much more capacity to process things. So you can fight habits with other habits. You will need to learn new things by not doing old ones. Is that easy? Not at all. People go through this by falling getting upp again and falling then getting up again. Eventually you start to get it. You will need people. We are flock animals and need support of others. You can not do this alone so get the right people too confide in when times are hard. Learn some coping mechanisms by talking to a CBT counsellor. That helps you a lot. GA is community so you will get strength from others. There are so many ways forward but like the mind changes with time your attitude to gambling will change to. Decide how you want to live and make it happen. You can do it!
Best
C
Thanks for the reply. Day two now no gambling. Probably does not seem alot but to gamble every day for 3 years, this is a massive step towards me beating this illness. Went for a walk with the dogs this morning & first time I had not gambled while walking them. I use to walk my dogs in the park and gamble while they would run around as to me I thought it was a good way of hiding my gambling. Put as many bets on as possible before I got home. What a sad state of mind looking back on it. The good thing for me is I am blocked from every site from gamcare for 5 years. So the temptation has gone as I know I can not get on any sites to gamble. Never been to a casino or a bookmaker so I know that would never be a problem for me. Online gambling was my downfall as it was so easy to gamble every minute of each day. I still have thoughts of placing bets in my head which I never thought was possible but I am sure in time that will fade out. Thanks for taking the time to read my story.
Hi.
Im 45 years old and after non stop gambling for years, I ended up here searching for help.
Have a read of my story/posts and I hope they give you as much help as reading others stories did for me. I’ve just popped back on to check my gamble free days and I’ve nearly hit 1.5k! At one point I couldn’t go a waking hour. I didn’t think it was possible to stop, but it really is if you get your blocks in place, refuse to feel guilty about what has happened and you look and move forward.
new year, new you? I dare you
@jy82 keep at you must have lost alot in 3 years, the funny thing is i was reading another story online about guy who won XXX then lost that and 130k chasing it within 5 days he was only 21 nothing was done to prevent check and limits surely they could have seen large transaction going through we have to remember gambling is a business and they know exactly what they are doing out of 100 people surely 90% are compulsive gambliers the one who enjoy doing it are the one that might go on weekend put the odd bet on have a laugh with friends i would say it worse for online gambling as very few would be doing it for entertainmrnt am sure their a million things a human can do to enjoy time for instance when i was gambling i did use to see some people in casino who just went their for a drink and dinner maybe watch sports they never gambled surely they could have gone to pub or club and done the same thing very few people enjoy actual gambling these establishments wouldnt run if their wasent problem gamblier thats food for thought
@jy82 I have done just this today. Only issue for me is online slots when feeling lonely. Usually after a high such as Xmas or holidays. I vow never to go on the sites again after an awful loss last night
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