Hi there this is the first day today I tried last year I added 5 year ban I managed 6 months thought I could do this then I found a way around it until it spiralled out of control once more why?? Because I did because I used all the excuses in the world to justify my actions to them and myself? am I happy I went back not one bit I’m in more debt my family are disappointed and I feel iv let them and myself down more than ever I don’t no what else to write except iv gone through step change my family are supporting me and this morning iv arranged to talk to a councillor I’m terrified and feel I’m completely alone in this but I want my life to change for the better I want my kids to have a mum that there proud of Why is it such a issue? Why can’t I just stop? What’s wrong with me? Thank you for just readingÂ
Welcome to the Forum and well done for posting this today . It sounds like you have been going through a tough time and we are really sorry to hear about this .
There's always hope and you are never alone and you have already made some great positive steps forward. By posting here today , By opening up to family who are supporting you and by contacting Step change.Â
There's nothing wrong with you , this is an addiction and a compulsion and now that you are on the steps to recovery things can get better each day gambling free.Â
Please feel free to contact the GamCare Helpline on 0808 8020 133 or Netline to explore the additional support available to you. We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week if you would like to talk to one of the GamCare HelpLine advisers.
All the bestÂ
KirkÂ
Forum AdminÂ
Thank you both for your replies I don’t have a partner as during lockdown I left a emotional abusive relationship who I was with for 11 years and I know as you said it started to escape I just can’t seem to get out of it already one day in he’s visiting the kids and he’s started and I just feel like screaming and playing online I won’t My first day is today and tomorrow will be my second thank you for your support and well done to you too it is so hard to admit and overcome I’m determined to try and you will too you also took the right steps I’m here to Also support if I canÂ
Hi Mummyz,Â
Thank you for sharing your story with the Forum.Â
From what you said it has been a difficult time for you over the last few months and you are taking all the right steps to recover from this.Â
It sounds like your ex partner is still around and that this is really difficult for you. I wonder if along with using our services it might be useful for you to speak to the National Domestic Abuse helpline or Family lives. They both might be able to provide some support for you. You are not alone in this and as the last Forum Admin mentioned, our advisers are available 24 hours a day. Keep using the Forum if you feel it helps and we do have a chatroom you can access twice a day (1pm and 8pm).Â
Take care,Â
RebeccaÂ
Forum Admin.Â
Tyvm I have done already they helped me leave but appreciate the support today has been a really tough day all round ?
I have tried family support social you name it it’s all a massive struggle he still is controlling which makes it much harder so I’m learning each day how to deal with it all Ty for ur encouragement and well done to you also I’m in a better mindset today as he’s blocked all areas so is gambling I have joined here and this is day 2  free from gambling so baby steps but the right direction I have a feeling things will get worse before they get better but am confident the support from this group and my willingness to want change will help thank you once again and Well done to you alsoÂ
Hi,Â
Having just read your post I hope you are in a better place now and things are looking on the up!Â
Keep strong
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