I need a friend...sorry if that sounds a bit desperate!

Hi there ReleaseMe, I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling like this. I’m not a gambler myself... and I’ve only been on this site a week. But I must say that the support I have been shown has made me feel so much better about my situation. There’s such a lot of support and good will from this community so I feel that you have come to the right place for help, advice and big support. From what I know about gambling, acknowledging the problem is a massive step. There is a phone number on this site too that you can call for advice. Also some of the diaries are inspiring and show very much how people have turned their lives around in a short space of time. I have read some of them and I have been inspired. I don’t want to give you any advice as I’m not a gambler myself... but I have read that it’s one day at a time... and practicing that gives you strength and hope. I will come back to you with some of the diaries I read. From my own experience, I wish my ex CG boyfriend had had the insight to recognize that he is a gambling addict and had the courage you have to seek the help needed. Be proud you have made that step

Thank you...I guess that where there is life there is hope. If you are a ‘victim’ of a gambler then it would be helpful if you could let me know how it made you feel... that’s if you do not mind and I am not being too intrusive. (Then I thought ‘stupid question’ and read your original post...Wow! I am so sorry for what happened to you. We gamblers forget or learn to not care about the consequences. We do become expert liars or manipulators (although at 2.00 am it becomes difficult to blank out). You have done nothing wrong...Never forget that you are the victim and that subsequently it is you whom deserves sympathy (which is difficult for me to admit as I am no I better than your ex partner). Try not to beat yourself up too much, you did your best and followed your heart which in itself is not a bad thing. Unfortunately you learnt a tough lesson, any compulsive behaviour must be addressed and dealt with by the perpetrator first by accepting that there is a problem. Be positive because your negative experience has helped someone else...ie me! Everything happens for a reason and you will be stronger wiser and a better person after your awful experience... Anyway thank you for responding and I look forward to hearing how you are getting along.

Thank you ReleaseMe for your powerful response. I’m very good today and much better than I was a week ago. It has been a truly difficult time especially as I did stay in touch with him when I came home.... but I think I was so angry with the lies, deceit and stealing that I just did not feel I could support him. Also, he told me he would give up the gambling when I found out ... but he made no effort to seek professional help or help of any kind... and in fact, he stole from me again. So that’s when I knew I had to come home. And that’s when my emotions about the situation really hit me. In relation to the impact, I think that family and friends of CG’s often need help and support too. And when they don’t get it, it can hurt them emotionally. I have found this site an amazing help. I think you can see from my story the impact that this situation has had on me... I felt very used too for money. I also felt that if he really cared about me that he would not have done what he did to me. I suppose I don’t really understand the power that addiction desperation has on a person... but I still felt that he could have decided to stop what he was doing sooner. Maybe I’m being totally naive about that.

I have decided that I won’t let this experience change me as a person... of course, I’m going to be more wary in the future but I have a good heart and will continue to show the warmth and kindness I have. And you’re right, this experience will definitely make me stronger. I’m starting to feel like me again. And generally, I am a strong woman and just try to get on with difficult situations in my life. I am glad that I have helped in some way and I’m still looking for those diaries!! Sabine... is one. It’s amazing and so inspirational!

I totally respect the fact that you’re taking responsibility for you and your actions. I believe that you have taken a massive step forward in making your life one of fulfillment. Thanks so much for your response and I’ll talk to you soon.

I’m back!! Also, I read the diary of Matt 24 and it was great. There are loads of fantastic diaries on here and it has really helped me to read them and people’s stories. You have made a very important step forward. Will keep in touch and sending you my best

Hi ReleaseMe, how are you doing today? Just checking in to see how you are. The diary of CJ is also great. He only started his journey recently and is very positive and supportive to other members. I hope you are well

Hello Maria25....Despite having the opportunity I haven’t gambled. Still have the desire but trying to keep the destructive consequences at the forefront as a deterrent. How are you getting on? Part of my strategy is to try and block it all out but I suppose that is not healthy...hence why I don’t constantly monitor this site. But if I know you are about then I’ll keep an eye on here...Anyway let me know how you are?

Hi ReleaseMe, I’m doing very well thanks. It’s lovely to hear from you. I’ve been doing lots of walking which really helps the mind and the endorphins!! I’ve booked myself a very cheap week away at the beginning of April to catch some sun and I’m really looking forward to that.

I was thinking about you and hoping you were doing okay. That’s great you’ve done 2 days and well done. It’s one day at a time ReleaseMe. I know everyone has different coping mechanisms and this site is great for giving support. I mentioned the diary of CJ as he has only recently started his own journey and is very positive and encouraging. You’re not on your own and I’m always here if you want to vent or just talk. Well done again and have a nice day. Talk to you soon.