I'm only young but my whole life I've been addicted to something, maybe it's just my personality, it went from drugs to alcohol to now being T Total but gambling, I've been doing it for 2 years which isn't long but I have such a need.. Sometimes I even like loosing and when I won't it's like I blank out, there will be money in my online betting account then I blank out and it's gone almost as if it wasn't me and then when I realise i get so depressed, it's causing problems with my relationship, my partner knows I gamble online and doesn't support it but them saying "no" doesn't seem to help. Today I lost 1100 to playing slots which is why I have joined gamcare. I don't know what to do, I currently have 6 payday loans of 500+ on each and I'm in debt to family members one being over a few thousand it's making me so stressed knowing I can't pay them back where it's effecting work. It's like gambling is my bubble and once it's popped il do anything to get it back even if it means lying, I hate the person it has made me and I just want someone to understand.
Hi AROB47,
Thanks for your post, and welcome to the forum. It sounds like gambling has caused a lot of stress in your life, and I'm glad you're taking steps to do something about it at this point.
A practical thing to start off with might be downloading blocking software. Programs like Gamblock or Betfilter prevent any gambling sites from opening on your computer, and a lot of gamblers find them to be really good protection when they're online. Those could help put up a barrier between you and gambling and give you a bit of breathing room.
Beyond that, it sounds like with your history of other addictions that you'd really benefit from individual counselling. Lots of people discover gambling after they've recovered from things like drugs or alcohol, but unfortunately, that can be just as destructive, as you're seeing. Addressing the underlying issues that are feeding these problems you're having would be a good step, and counselling can also help you learn healthier ways to manage your urges and take better care of yourself. It sounds like you've got a lot of years still ahead of you, so dealing with all this now could make them a lot less stressful.
If you'd like to chat with us about any of this, feel free to ring us on the Helpline (0808 8020 133) or the Netline from 8am to midnight any day of the week and we'd be happy to speak with you.
You can get back to being someone that you like, and feel better about yourself. As long as you have the desire to quit gambling, you can succeed, as long as you don't give up and keep trying. Remember that you were able to quit drugs and alcohol, now gambling is just the next one to tackle.
Hang in there, and I hope this helps.
Travis
Thankyou, that has made me feel loads better about my situation. Stupidly today once again I have spent 300 on slots online but I transfers the remaining balance of my bank (as it is payday) to my partner and we are going to get the cash out from the bank so It's not as easy to gamble online, if I want to play online my partner said I give them cash and they put in that way I might understand I'm loosing money instead of realising after I've spent hundards of pounds. I hope this helps me to cut down at least.
Hi AROB47,
sounds like you are heading down the right path and are putting steps in place. I am completely new to this myself but I wanted to say Hi, as personally it helps me to know that there are people out there reading what we have written that care, and that understand how painful this is.
Im in the process of installing blocking software now, Ive also set filters on my email, and Ive wiped all associated casino software. Im going to get something for my Iphone as well. I know that for me with the online slots the sheer ease of access to them was a big part of my problem. Im aiming to make it as difficult as possible for myself to get to them again should I feel weak. This is only my opinion of course, but I think the more blocks I put in place the more I force myself to "have to make a decision to gamble" i.e. - I would have to actively attempt to get around the blocks I have put in place in order to bet, and I am hoping that will remind me WHY I needed to put said blocks there in the first place. Maybe as a first timer to recovery this is naiive of me, but I am going to do as many "little things" as I can, in the attempt to form those little things into a large barrier to gambling.
All the best, and remember there are people here rooting for you.
FM.
thankyou.
after reading this i think i'm going to install a blocking software too because today ive gambled again, not as much as i normally do but i stopped because i saw my net amount ive put into the website i have put in over 13,000 in the last 2 year and thats only one of the sites i use, i have about 3 other account i use regularly. i have been debating going to a gambling meeting like AA but for gamblers but im a 20 year old female and i dont know what to expect and im really embrassed.
You've joined this site but are still betting. It shows you want to quit but it's got a big hold on you.
You really need help close to you and to use these blocking sites.
How have you done since monday?
Hi AROB47
I've been in this situation before. First of well done for coming to Gamcare. I know whats its like to have dug yourself into a hole and to think there's no way out. It's only natural when faced with a certain level or stress, anxiety that we get depressed and burry our head into the ground.
PLEASE understand that looking for that one big win will not save you from this situation. Your in the middle of vicious cycle. Your hoping that one big win will come along and all will be ok. Mathematically (especially with Casino games) they are designed to give the house a major advantage and you a major disadvantage.
Your first step out of this situation you have already taken is coming here. The second step is to realize that life is not over and life will go on and confront your situation head on. Yes it will be painful at first but taking action now will save you from making the situation much more worse. As others have suggested self exclusion and blocking software is a good place to start.
You have discovered a weakness about yourself. I felt embarrassed about this when I found out. I've since realized that I grateful I found this weakness, it means I'm now a stronger person for knowing this. There is light at the end of the tunnel I promise. You will walk out of this situation. The last step you need to do is take a valuable lesson learned. Don't become complacent and think that gambling is a solution to things.
Wish you all the best 🙂
Matt
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