Hello all, I am very new to this, joined yesterday to be precise ! Seven years ago I started gambling, it started small, then after loosing about 1000 it turned into panic, I kept going in the hope that I would win back my losses, it has always been on the online slots, the ironic thing is on a 125.00 a go spin I won 17000, that would have got me back to where I had started, so I withdrew it right, wrong ! My head was then telling me, hold on you could win big here, cut a story that went on for about two months short I ended up loosing 45000. My husband found out and understandably went mad, I had a rather large pension, and took some money out of that to pay him back in full, all sorted then, no ! We will come back to the pension in a minute, Despite all this a few months later I started gambling again, looking back it seems that my reasoning for gambling is it is a good way of getting extra cash, problem was when I did have a big win my head would say keep going you could get it bigger !!! I used to tell myself my new gambling was not a problem as I only spent the spare income I had, did not get into debt to fund it and never borrowed to fund it. And so it continued for years, one evening I came back from work to a letter from hmrc appears the company I used to realise the funds were not legitimate and the matter was going to be investigated, and could result in a payment owing of 25000 for the vat not paid on the payment release. And that was it, I started gambling away our savings to try and get 25000, listening to myself now, I can't believe what an idiot I was, two days ago my husband found out and understandably went mad, my clothes were on the front door step when I got home and I have been sleeping on my daughters sofa since, the plus side of this is that she is studying to be a counsellor and has recently been studying gambling so has been an absolute god send. Sorry for the rant guys but It really has helped just writing it all down. I have read some of the stories on here and it has made me realise I'm am not unique just another statistic in a very worrying addiction
You certainly aren't on your own Heather....loads of us here in the same sort of boat...me ...finding the online slots one day ..quite by accident really....fun at first 20p spins soon increased...like you I had a good win....and thought all the things you've said ....it's how the addiction grows. ...slowly taking more and more....and sadly not just money.....anyway...your here now. ..and that's a massive good start...the bombs gone off and now you have to deal with the fall out .....my immediate advice would be to read and read on here.....give the helpline a ring for practical advice....it's great you've got your daughter to hand....and even better that she's got an interest in addiction....take a deep breath and take one day at a time. ..come here often...ask questions....write down what your feeling....it does help...good luck x
Thank you Loxxie, i have only been on here a day, and it is already helping, reading other people's stories I realise that this is horribly common, it seems the Internet has a lot to answer to, although today was my first successful day, today was pay day and I still have every penny in my account, I closed all my accounts last night just have to hold back on the temptation to open a new one ! But so far so good X
Good for you hun..I set up parental blocks on my bb to not allow gambling sites....works so well....maybe worth a try...I think it's best to have as many obstacles in place to stop you running to the slots especially in the early days....it's tragic how so many are getting hooked up in the secret world of online slots..but least you know now your not alone x.
It you don't mind me asking how long have you been 'clean' and how did you deal with your partner with this. It's only through coming on here that I realise I am being selfish towards my husband, I need to give him time, I did email him earlier and basically said the amount of Rubbish he has put me through that I have forgiven him for and the things I have helped him with why can't he help me, in foresight totally the wrong thing ! If we all had a crystal ball hey ! X
Of course I don't mind..
I've been gamble free for about 250 days....
Everybodies is such a long story...for the full version click on my name...but basically...
Future son in law told hubby....
My youngest daughter knew and was given me " time " to tell hubby..
Anyway...he spilled the beans via text ...poor hubby was dumb founded...had no idea..
Anyway he reacted in the total opossite way to what I expected...me..my daughter and him sat till 5 am outside in our smoking shelter just talking...the bomb had blown....debris everywhere.....but very slowly. ..one day at a time practical things were sorted ...relationships were examined....and the journey started....
Wow you've done so well, I hope things continue to improve for you and thank you so much for talking with me X
THANKYOU...
And your very welcome...
Us girls like to chat lol...
Let the debris settle a little hun. ..
Think what you really want...
Just Remember hun....online slots will give you back nothing...zero...zilch ...what lady wants such a one-sided relationship !. ..
Thank you, I just feel so numb at the moment this is all so hard at the moment and that added to not knowing if my husband will speak to me hurts, some of the proper is he has a large network of friends and times like this we end up with more than three in the marriage if you get my meaning ! X
You will feel numb..sad..guilty.. .just about every emotion on the planet...nothing will change overnight love...you've got to concentrate on you...I hear what your saying about hubby...he's got to get his head around it all...I don't know the inns and outs of your marraige love....not do I know what the future hokds....what I do know is online slots is not the answer....sometimes I think we just have to hold tight and ride the storm....I can promise you though....that everyday you don't play slots will take you a day closer to all the answers x
Hi Ladies, I just joined today. Im at my breaking point. $30,000 in debt and now my son is in debt too from on line trading and Ive co-signed on a $30,000 loan for him that neither one of us can pay now. He had to move back home with me and I can't help him because Im on the verge of doing a consumer proposal to get out of my mess. Im a single parent of 2 boys, 26 and 28 now and my 28 year old is developmentally challenged, so it's been a struggle for me. I started playing in the real casino and banned myself and then I found on line slots and lost a lot there. I started counselling and then I fell back to on line slots again when my stress came back with my son and my job and just life in general. I don't know how to get out of this mess now.
Good morning
And welcome, although don't think any of us wanted to end up meeting in here ! I too am a newbie so can't give you much advice based on experience, although what I would say to you is (and this is from personal experience) try talking to the people in the live chat they are great and some of them have been going through this for a long time, also ring the number on here I have not done it yet but they are supposed to be great and can give more practical advice on what to do. Based on what I have gone through in the last few days I can tell you this, don't dwell on the past you can't change it, focus on the future and how you are going to deal with it, if you can get debt management sorted out do it as soon as possible at least then you can manage you finances based on what they want you to pay back on a monthly basis, put a block on your computer, phone, tablet whatever you use so that your cannot open gambling sites, close all the ones you have, another thing you could do is order a new card and scratch out your csv number on the back so you can't use it online, these are some of the things you can do but please speak to the more established people on here I have found them to be very inspirational, heather x
Morning Heather...great advice you've just given..well done you..
You found much more posative today . Your right . ..yesterday's are gone. ...all we can do is learn from them...do you do face book
Morning Loxxie,thank you in the short 24 hours I have been on here I have learnt a lot, a lot about actions I can take, and that I am not some unique weirdo, a lot of people are going through this, I am very proud that I have not succumb to temptation even though I have money in my bank account a big step in the right direction, it is only 24 hours but it is 24 hours that I will not look back on and regret ! You know over the years with bringing up my three girls I have been 'mummy' number two to all there friends, they always used to come to me for advice, as I would not be judgemental just try and guide them in the right direction, I am pretty good at dishing it out but I think the worlds worst at actually taking my own advice, another big hurdle (I think) with regards to my husband, when I got paid I put 500 back in the savings account, not much but it is going in the right direction and I will keep putting money in every month until paid, any way I have checked the account this morning and even though I have text him and told him I have put it in, he hasn't taken it out, I strangely see this as a positive thing !? Yes I do do Facebook I am under xx
Hello Heather
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Best wishes
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