The side effects of FOBTs - DEBT

Hi Jamzie and welcome to the forum :)).

My downfall was the Fob't mate so I know only too well how they have you in their vice like grip and how difficult it is to noyt give in to the temptation of taking them on again :((.

You know I stopped gambling over 18 month ago when I came here , that point was the lowest in my life and I'd contemplated ending it all as I couldn't see anyway out at the time , I just couldn't stop pouring thousand's of pounds into those things , which isn't difficult when I was betting £ 100 a spin every few seconds , so I know that feeling well my friend :(( .

Youv'e just started to get into debt but if you don't stop and draw a line under it things will quickly become far worse , in the couple of months leading upto me quitting I'd probably won 10 to 12 k in the casino plus various amounts on the Fobt's and still ended up in 10 grand of debt , a day or so before I stopped I won about £1500 in the morning in one bookies and 2 hrs later lost it all plus another £500 on top ? , How crazy is that ? . The trouble is when we become compulsive gamblers the money reall doesn't matter at all , we are after our daily fix , our buzz ? and that buzz becomes more and more expensive to get as time goes on , it's never as good as it was that first time time of winning and all the winninings or borrowings as I like to call them , is keep you in the gambling cycle , thier just tokens so we can keep playing .

If you want to stop then you can but you have to b e strong and prepared to help yourself , there's no magic wand I'm afraid .

You'll never beat those machines , it's all aboiut odds and statistics and they;ll always be in the bookies favour otherwise they wouldn't in business would they ? . Sure you'll get the odd win and maybe evn hit the jackpot now and again but that's just designed to keep you playing , throwing you a few crumbs to keep you interested and I'm sure you like I have had plenty of near misses , usually the number either side of the one you have lumped your money on ? .

Ask yourself this " How much is £ 500 giong to change your life ? , not much really I would think but that's it , that's all your ever going to win on a maximum payout if it comes in and how many times has that happened ? , yet we stand there pumping £100s and £ 1000s in those machine just to win £ 500 poxy quid , it's crazy !! .

It's like standing in a boxing ring with the Fob't as a heavyweight and you as a lightweight getting smashed and beaten to a pulp every round but still willing to take the punishment day after day when you simply cannot win ! .

Make a start by self excluding , you only need a handfull of photos and a few minutes , you can either as I did go around all your fav bookies and exclude yourself or theres a national number which will be able to do it for you , the info is available on this site if you need it . I preffered going around myself , the first ones the toughest but it gives you a real sense of pride knowing your taking back control of your life again :)) That's part of what we refer to on here as the Triangle , Time, money , location and early day's it will keep you safe , if you remove one and keep the triangle broken then you can't gamble , the exclusion deals with the location , the time is about you keeping busy and occupied and the money is about making sure you din't have too much access to it , just have on you what you need , don't carry card's and such and better still particularly in the early stages think of handing over your finances to someone you can trust which brings me onto the point of telling people you have a problem , most people on here at least those who have managed to stop gambling have had to sit down with those they love and have the conversation , I did and it wasn't a day that I looked forward to but once done it stops it being your little secret and gambling no longer has anywhere to hide , so you need to think seriously about coming clean to you mum and dad , I know it's not someghing you want but you'll probably be suprised and you will definately need support along the way :)) .

The last bit of advice I can give you is too accept what youve done , dont beat yourself up too much , were all human and we all make mistakes but we can also learn from those mistakes , draw a line and accept that what youv'e lost has gone for good , I looked on it as an expensive life lesson or as a cure for an illness which had cost me 10k but allowed me to live a normal happy life from that point :)).

If your anything like I was it's probably a relief that it's not just you and that by coming here your not alone ?

There's plenty of people to talk to on here and lots of diary's to read if you wish , Gamcare can arrange councilling if you wish it's free as is the chatrooms at various times of the day or there's external help such as GA if that's something of interest , it's all bespoke so just use whatever you need :)) .

Best wishes for now and I'll talk to you soon , keep talking and putting your thoughts down and maybe consider a recovery diary on the other page as well ? :))

Alan

Hi Jamzie23

You need to tell your parents all about the addiction if you can as soon as possible.

One of the key triggers will be getting more money that you can feel flush for a moment with.

Its not idiocy jamzie. Its an addiction which we have to learn about. Its a powerful and complex addiction which made us do things just like you.

With your openness honesty and proper blocking measures you will make this history. You do need to understand the grip it has had on you.

Really you need no access to loans now and someone should be managing your money. Im deadly serious there as your mind needs time to heal. There is no room for half measures and people can help you if they are managing your finances. Your parents do need to know that no money must come your way without them seeing where it is going

Are you ready for that?? Its not about treating you like a baby. Its about saving your quality of life

Best wishes from everyone on the forum