Good evening everyone,
So after 14 years of gambling it’s now time for serious change.
My addiction is to gambling, mainly roulette on the FOBT machines. Last week on payday I went and blew a substantial amount, and carried on getting money from where ever I could find it as we do. I was around £700 short for essential bills..Â
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I hit my lowest point and recognised that I wasn’t actually gambling with money any more but actually with my life. I felt that low that I genuinely felt that if that happened again I’d probably attempt something silly.
Anyway 40 minutes on the phone to someone from GA and I pulled myself around determined to change. I’ve put the blocks back in place with Moses, and still blocked from previously with online casinos.
Yesterday was tough explaining everything to family again, but they knew I was gambling again but I’d never admit it. I essentially cut everything and everyone off and the worse 4 month stint of gambling I’ve had, and I thought I’d had some bad ones previously!
so here we are.. day 4 gamble free, and I’m determined to stop this mental torture I put myself through.
I have an appointment this week with a group Gamcare recommended, and GA meeting on Wednesday.
time for a new life, and time to document that journey hopefully.
I hope you can all support me through that journey, as I will do the same with you ?
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Hi Daisey I was in a similar position 22 years compulsive gambler,slots,casinos,bookies,sport betting you name it.
I am currently on day 15 today gambling free and my life was never as good as it is now.
Depths don't go within days no,I still owe lots of money from my gambling past but I believe within a right time it all be paid off
I don't go to any counselling because I don't believe in it,I've done that in the past and I gambled straight after the meeting so for me it's a complete nonsense.Some people find it helpful some don't.
Hi
By going to meetings I would exchaneg my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits.
Every time I came out of the gambling establsihments with no money I was causing myself more and more pains.
The consequencesd fo my suffering pains was fears I did not understand.
Only by abstaining from unhealthy habits could I exchange them in to healthy habits.
In the rooms of recovery I would get more honest with my self.
By not hurting myself I would reduce the fears I was causing in myself.
The recovery room therapies helped me understand how emotionally vulnerable I was.
My emotional triggers were my pains I could not heal.
My emotional triggers were my fears I could not reduce.
My emotional triggers were my unreasonabale expectations of people life and situations.
My emotional triggers were my being such aloner.
My emotional triggers were my being bored and uable to do things in healthy ways.
When I did things in resentful ways I got no credit or reward from doing them.Â
I could not show sincere gratitude or appreciation because my emotional values were very low.
In my recovery I would reward my self for being so healthy.
The therapies were enabling me to articualte what my feelings and emotions were.
The therapies would help reduce my fears.
The therapies would help increase my trust in others and my self.
As my trust grew my intimacy grew with myself and with others.
Love and peace to every one.
Dave L
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