Trying to stop

Hi Onepunch,

Without wishing to sound condescending; well done for coming on here and posting your story.

Gambling addiction gives you that hope that one day you’ll get that big win, which will set you up for life, but you and I both know that the size of the wins are irrelevant as as soon as you win that money becomes ‘stake’; if you were to win thousands or tens of thousands, it is highly likely it would end up back with the gambling company, that’s how it works, and if we struggle to quit when at the bottom of the barrel, we would no chance whilst we have means to feed a habit.

I’m not sure where you are spending your money, but if you lost such a large amount in one day, I would hazard a guess at online.

Number one priority, Is to get the blockers in place on your phone and pc, limit your ability to gamble.

I wish you all the best.

D

Hi One Punch,

Good opening post and very honest. It will help your recovery if you can get to the bottom of why you gamble and it looks like you're already half way there. It might be worth contacting GamCare to get some councelling as if you can address the reason you gamble then addressing the gambling itself will be a lot easier. The big question is why you feel you need these material things (which, trust me, gambling won't buy you) and hopefully someone more qualified than myself will help you to answer that.

You CAN have the things you want but it won't happen overnight and it certainly won't involve gambling. My advice (based on personal experience and, moderate, success) is to get a job but start up a business on the side doing either something you love or something you think will 'work'. Yes, you'll be doing 70 hour weeks rather than the 40 you dread BUT you are working towards an exit strategy and you will find genuine fulfillment in what you are doing (in the meantime, the 'day job' will keep a roof over your head whilst you're building the business). This will also keep you busy and away from gambling (the 'quick fix' for mundanity).

Before ALL of this though, you have to get blocks in place to stop your gambling. Self-exclusion, blocking software, relinquishing financial control etc. VERY important in the early stages of recovery.

All the best

Phil

P.S - This is my advice (apart from the last paragraph which is universally accepted as gospel!) and my experience. You have to do what works for you but, be assured, gambling will NEVER work for you (only against!)

Thanks, it's ok, you don't soun condescending. If I could stop, I could win hundreds a day, every day. But because I've had such big wins and losses it's just not enough anymore. I won ВЈ1900 on a football bet then on my first roulette spin won another ВЈ1000 and then lost it all.. I just want to be able to walk.. I enjoy gambling and I know it could be profitable if I just learn to control myself. I mostly gamble online yes, I hate walking home after losing, being out in public when I'm angry because I also went to prison another time for throwing a chair at the bookies staff when they shouted at me for punching the fobt machine. I'm banned from 2 bookies in my area, one for the chair thing and another for breaking the machine with a chair when I lost £1000 so it's just safer for me to do it at home. There's always going to be sites I can access, I've banned myself from a few sites after big kisses but ultimately I'll always come back so it just seems like a waste of time and I don't want to put myself in a position where I'm desperate because I don't know what I'll do and if I go prison I'll probably lose my girlfriend.

I think I need counselling that's why I went to my doctor but like I said he sent me here and said to book another appointment in a month if this doesn't work. Gambling has bought me a few things that have actually made me pretty happy and it's allowed me to give my mum money and do food shopping for my mum and my girlfriend and to pay off some of what I owe my girlfriend, I actually paid off quite a lot then I borrowed £200 back and lost it. Ultimately you're right though, unless I win a slots jackpot, the lotto or a number I have max chips on comes 38928 times in a row, I probably won't be happy for long. I'm just not where I feel I should be and I just want to catch up. Even when I work I think and talk about money, every job they'll be someone who gambles who engages me and most people love talking about what they'd do if they won the lotto. I really don't think blocks would work for me because when I get desperate I'll try get money by any means and I'd rather stay inside and lose money than go outside and maybe hurt someone and get arrested.. I think my attitude and outlook is probably a big problem here.. I sound like a greedy idiot I know, I just see money and things differently to a lot of people.

Thank you both for your comments though.

Hi Onepunchjamoo,

Thanks for your post, and well done for sharing your story here.

You seemed to be struggling with your gambling problem, trying to win some big sum of money, but then you put it all back in again. Gambling is actually like that.

I think you’ll benefit from our advice on how to manage your finances and eventually stop gambling.

I suggest that you contact Gamcare on our free phone Helpline:- 0808 8020 133, and speak to one of our advisers and find out what other help options are available to you.

We are open from 8.00am to midnight, every day.

My best wishes to you on your journey to recovery, and please keep posting!

Regards,

Beatrice

Hi im new to this iv just recently gone and loat a big chunk of my life saving. Im 27 and worked very hard doing S****y jobs to save up ВЈ70000 in cash in the bank. Until.recently i was always on the fobts in bookies. Always winning and losing in the hundreds. Until recently when i lost 2500 in an hour in the bookies. So i took someones bad advice and went casino to win Kt back and guess what i did win it back. But i went back again a few days ago and lost 1000 very quikly and started chasing. I again took someones bad advice and went on a roulltte table and let the play for me until i had lost all in all. ВЈ11000 in 4 hours. And i couldnt get over it so i went again and happened again i lost a further ВЈ8800 so i basically lost ВЈ20000 in a week. Im absolutely gutted why i couldnt stop what money could have been used for etc. I was saving for a house and car at the same time . I still have money but im strugling to get over it. I dont know how i could do that. This is the reason i avoided casinos because once i lose ВЈ10 ill risk £100 to get it back

I know how it feels to lose a large amount after losing ВЈ28,000 in a day that was all I had, I think the best thing you can do is try to accept the loss and be thankful you still have ВЈ50,000. I don't know where you live but that could buy a flat or a house that needs work where I live. I gamble because one of the things I want is enough money to buy a house without a mortgage. I also wouldn't trust anyone with your money like that, because if you win they'll probably ask for some but if you lose then they'll claim it wasn't their fault. You clearly have more will power than me being able to save so much, I just hope for your sake that you don't try win back the £20k. I don't think gambling is bad, just people should do it in moderation and stick to limits but when you win, human nature and greed kick in and you want more so I guess some people just aren't built for it.

Don't see it as a loss, see it as a lesson.

I just went and did it again. Lost my last pay and now I have no money coming in and I'm broke. I gave my girlfriend ВЈ50 before I started then when I lost my money I took it back and lost that too. I was ВЈ100 up with my money then £90 up with her's but it wasn't enough.

Hi
They offer free councilling on here. You dont even have to visit them you can do it over the phone. Councilling is a good way to see the demons that we have. Sometimes is hard to except them and to let them out.
I know you say gambling is ok but it isnt. It is really hard to execpt you have problem but that is what we have. Chasing that one big win, but it never comes because it is never good enough or big enough.
Its so hard somedays and i like you have taken myself of loads of sites but found ways back on. People talk about blocking software. It is funny as i used to say i am not paying xxx for that piece of software what a waste of mobey. Then gamble thousands away. Our thoughts are our worst enemy.
Think about councilling on here i am.sure it will help especially with the anger you said you get when losing.
Hope you are ok.

I think I'd prefer face to face counseling to be honest, I don't like talking on the phone. But I do really think I need counselling which is why I've gone to the doctors but they told me to try this for a month then go back. I'm the same, I bargain hunting and spend carefully but then I lose hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands.. I get that gambling can cause negative effects but I always win.. if I just walked away I'd be laughing. I wish I never started, I don't view money the same anymore and because of that I'm so unhappy in any job I have because I feel like an idiot working 40 hours a week to make what I could make in one spin on my phone in bed.. I think I know how I feel, I know my thoughts are greedy and stupid too, I'm not sure what I want or how it can be helped but I do really want this to stop..

Hi Onepunchjamoo

Our counselling is mainly face to face, offered in various locations across England, Scotland and Wales. It's free. You've said yourself that your anger can get out of control and you've been violent towards property and people, and you're concerned that your anger could result in prison. It sounds like you urgently need support for your gambling addiction. Why not give us a call on 0808 8020 133 to see what's on offer? If you prefer not to phone, you can chat to us 1:1 on the NetLine to get the ball rolling.

Deirdre
Forum Admin

Thank you, I think I'll try that considering I've just won ВЈ2 off a daily free spin, got to £180 on roulette and lost it then created tension between my girlfriend and I like I always do when I lose. I doubt you'll do it where I live because I live in a small town and I've looked into meetings online only to find the closest one in the city next to me which I can't afford to get to because I have no income at all.

The closest to me are Stoke and Nottingham.. I live in Burton-on-Trent and I'm broke so basically unless you live in a city you're f*cked. The person I spoke to suggested the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy so I guess I'll check there next

Done it again,borrowed ВЈ8 from my girlfriend to extend my buy back time on something I sold ski could gamble and I gambled it, then I borrowed ВЈ10 from my mum and lost that then another £10 from my girlfriend. The amounts are tiny, usually I'll throw away hundreds, but I have no job and I'm not on benefits so I'm going to stress about paying them back. My girlfriend is SO supportive and doesn't make me feel worse than I already do but I just hate this, I feel so depressed and worthless after losing. I'm fed up and if I'm honest being on here doesn't help me..

Hi onepunchjamoo i found for me the only thing that stopped me gambling online was when i hit rock bottom had no money to pay bills and scared myself spent all my credits cards had pay day loans i could not afford. I realised if i did not stop i was going to lose my family . Everyone is different but i think you have to reach a point and then your brain kicks in you have to stop . I really hope you reach this point soon so you stop wasting your money and time . The problem us compulsive gamblers have is we love playing its not the winning thats why we always give it back every time . Why not try stopping just one day at a time like me . I will not gamble today . I really hope you can stop good luck my friend Bambi