After 15 years I self excluded today

@releaseme. Yeah, I kind of get it.  We have been flooding your brain with dopamine by gambling for years.  It becomes a comfort blanket.  Even with the losses I experienced I would return back and gamble again.

All of that is taken away and the dopamine drops and you feel less at ease, more flat and more anxious.

Hopefully your GP can get you on a short course of Valium or other dopamine related meds.  It works in about 30min and worked for me until I felt more stable. 

I feel more level now.  I was anxious earlier but did a 5km run and really pushed it hard and it has taken the anxiety away.

Would be good if you could find something that is going to give you the buzz.  Exercise is the easiest.

Hope the GP appointment works out

@releaseme hi mate.  How's it going?

@thebean this is my problem I have acknowledged my faults and addiction I confess daily to the sin but I am stuck with debts and bo one to turn to...and this daily stress is unbearable and sometimes feel like there is no way out the constant call from lenders etc and the constant denials to get the funds to clear at least some debts and have some sort of peace so that I can fight tru the rest

Posted by: @releaseme

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Hello

Today I self excluded. After 15 plus years of despair, lies and  utter destruction I finally did it…I had an appointment with a specialist counsellor in the morning yet I gambled all that I had (and what I owed to others) straigh afterwards. The usual suicidal feelings combined with a pure hatred of oneself are now weighing very heavy on my shoulders..

I guess I have to start facing the reality of what I have done which is so daunting so I will get drunk and hope I do not wake up tomorrow.

These words are for me (because I have no one to talk to as I have alienated anyone who did care)…Being a gambler I am selfish, self centred and ultimately I am a no good liar. It’s cool because I have reaped what I have sown. 

 

Made me think about when I was planning a road trip and had to make sure the car I bought was actually road-ready. I used https://www.faxvin.com  and it gave me the full history—accidents, title status, mileage, the whole deal. It felt good knowing exactly what I was dealing with before hitting the road. Same kind of thing applies here—when you get all the facts and decide to steer your life in a better direction, it opens up a whole new journey. Wishing you strength on this new path, and thanks for sharing—it really helps others feel less alone.

Big respect for making that move - it’s like deciding to finally take a different road after being stuck in traffic for years. That first step is always the toughest, but it sets the direction for everything that follows.