Good morning everyone and hoping you're enjoying the weekend.
I'll be posting a mini-update this evening; away on a mini-break with my family this weekend. Being a recovering problem gambler, day by day, not gambling, affords such pleasures. Rather than soullessly wasting money, I'm doing stuff with my loved ones. Guilt free.
I'm loving the positivity in the posts lately. It's not easy, this, but we can do it, and get used to the better life (compared to the ongoing 'dull, thudding headache' of the alternative).
As for the World Cup, let's enjoy it for what it is - an enjoyable celebration of the beautiful game.
Not worth a gamble; are we that one-dimensional everything has to revolve around a bet?
NO. We're better than that.
Have a great day everyone!
Mixer
Checking in on day 7, have a lovely weekend all x
Checking in, 26 days.
Been thinking less about gambling and feels like ages since I quit but in fact it’s less than one pay day since!
Finances looking better already and not wasted down the drain at the slots.
I just need to continue to see that this is the only way I’ll ever sort out my finances and become financially more stable. I hate being in debt and having no way to save anything significant due to such a large chunk paying off money owed every month.
Got to do it this time ! No more back tracking .. been there many times over the past few years. This time it needs to be a permanent end to it all. Best wishes to you all for the gamble free coming week.
Well done Mixer on 300 days ... and also well done Sars27. Today I am 29 days GF and I also second Mixer’s words on how lovely it is to be able to spend money on pleasurable things with the family etc. Not having to worry that there is no money left in the account for bills due to gambling. This is the longest that I have can hand on my heart say I have been GF for xx much love all xx
19 days gf : -)
*** Sunday Catch-up ***
Good evening everyone! I hope you've had a good week and weekend. And maybe enjoying the football, if that's your thing. But not betting on it. The fact that a million accas went up in smoke with the Germany game is a moot point, because if we - as problem gamblers - win, then we keep going till we eventually lose, and then lose some more. That's why we can never enjoy a win - we don't keep it, and then lose it all and more. The definition of that is self-inflicted torture, surely!
Many experts suggest trying to block gambling out of your mind. It sounds good, in theory. The problem is, gambling is bloody everywhere. Telly, high street, devices - there's no hiding from it. So why not try this. If you do think about gambling, then do so. But think about how better things are that you're not gambling; being contented that you're making the right decision to abstain for life (my view of recovery; there are other views). Inwardly smile because you've made a consious effort to make this decision that will, in the main, make you feel relaxed, guilt free and contented.
Yes - you will feel undoubtedly feel 'cold turkey (I do, 300 days gambling free!). You will feel uncomfortable and irritable as the gambling devil 'deep within' kicks up an almighty fuss. And it will. And is. However make d**n sure that the gambling devil knows it is an unwelcome tenant and you keep booting it out, to kingdom come, every time it has the temerity, the sheer cheek, the gall, the nerve, to cross your threshold. Picture that scene as you boot it into kingdom come.
Attitude of mind is key to this, in my opinion. Get the mindset in place and everything flows - getting the blocks in place and that inner focus to succeed, one day at a time.
In other news .......... I would like to propose a change to the Guru Challenge, and that is that I dispense with the rollcall. The reason is twofold.
One, the 2018 Challenge admirably takes up that role, counting up the gambling free days. It has carried out this service, fit for purpose, for years. And two, I think a tweak of direction for our thread will improve it. Allow me to explain...
My proposal is that the Guru Challenge carries on with bi-weekly catch-ups, where everyone who posts (since the last catch-up) gets a guaranteed reply (from me, at the very least), this keeping our journeys very much alive with that guaranteed personal touch. Of course, we often post to each other on this thread and that fosters a great sense of comraderie - always unconditional, empathetic and genuinely helpul support, of course - and we're not afraid of 'tough love' either.
I hope this change of Challenge direction is helpful to everyone. There are quite a few of us now (around 30) and I've found myself spending much more time of the logistics of that, when I'd rather spend time with more personal replies. It provides a difference, and distinction from the excellent 2018 Challenge. And - if anyone does relapse (it happens..!!!) then I believe there a better chance of us 'bouncing back', instead of recoiling and disappearing because everyone knows you've hit "Day 0". We don't expect 'perfection' here - just a commitment to help ourselves help ourselves to deal with this addiction. For the avoidence of doubt, we all want to do whatever it takes to deal with this addiction; that's our indisputable aim. And we support each other unconditionally.
Do let me know what you think. And now - on cue, let's see how we're getting on!
Bigmug - Really loving your determination and with 19 days under your belt, and a payday (if you're salaried) on the horizon we can see you hit that 30 days. It will beed blocks in place; bever be afraid to make 'em! Keep it going 🙂
JA72 - I've been reading your recent posts with alarm because the gambling devil within you is giving you a really **** time. The World Cup, I'm assuming, hasn't helped matters. I've written a personal message on your diary. Keep kicking that 'devil' in the shins and keep blocking. You're being tested and stepping up to the plate; recognise what's happening, and active on the Gamcare forums. You have the edge.
WhereIsMyMind - Welcome to our group. Like the name - we've all asked the same question, many times. Remember, our willpower is no help; we use it to sneakily start up gambling again; it works against us! Hence why we need other countermeasures, practical and mental (counselling, GA etc). Have you read this, might set off a few thoughts - http://www.gamcare.org.uk/forum/want-do-something-read (first post).
Determind Dan - thank you for your kind words. I've only had 10 pints in 21 days averaged over 4 sessions. Have dramatically reduced the booze. When the doctor says 'cut back' and provides evidence that even I can see (made me go white), then it really focuses the mind somewhat! I'm delighted to see you've chalked up 35 days gambling free (30 days+ means your serious) and that's fantastic, my friend.
Chartom3 - thank you for checking in and resolutely, quietly, determinedly heading for 200 days. You've had your 'dry run' before and this time, with zero complacency, you're back, and back in spades. Noted and respected.
Christer1 - I hope, in light of what's been happening in your life that you're heading towards as even a keel as possible. Sometimes, certain things happen and they turn our lives sideways and it's hard to keep control. We're with you, Christer, to help 'steady the ship', Ok.
Godoicul - Excellent progress. 177 days gambling free, almost half a year (183 days). I know I haven't put a 'hex' on you reaching that milestone, because I know you're bloody determined - say no more.
Tara2 - Hi Tara. You've written that you've a few things to sort out, and you will, in your own sweet time. Going gambling free affords us an element of control to make these decisions. One of the multitudinous advantages of being gambling-free is - more control. You start to dictate the pace, rather than let events run you - its no fun, forever 'chasing our tails'. All good, Tara 🙂 !
Wardal1979 - I'm really genuinely pleased to see you appraoch 30 days; as I've said, this is the milestone that proves intent because within 30 days of a relapse, it's inevitable they'll be an element of 'free spend' to try and tempt us again. You see the benefits, and are happier. That 's what it's all about. Keep going, choose the better life all round!
Sars27 - thank you for checking and hope that everything is just fine for your and your lovely family. Your posts reassert your commitment with a healthy 'freshness' that symbolises both your spirit and inner steel. Superb!
xangel11 - I hope you had a good weekend, too! You're back, reaffirming your commitment to go gambling free and we can't ask for more than that. Keep blocking, and keep going - you know it makes sense !!!
Boxingdayfresh - When having to pay debts due to gambling, doing so can be demoralising. But ... there is always an end date, a time when the debts are cleared. Very motivational. Don't forget Stepchange or MoneySavingExpert to limit the interest charges. A 'quick win' that even Gamcare would approve of. You can enginee r your own success, and how better things will be as that light at the end of the tunnel gets bigger. And there a better life to lead right now; some things are priceless and transend money. Like your loved ones, friends and family getting the real 'you' back!
Let's keep strong, keep blocking, and keep smiling, everybody!
Till next time,
Mixer
Hello.
I've decided to start my journey today. Day 1.
Is anyone else finding that they are getting loads of text messages from sites you have never been on before ... trying to entice you ? I am registered with GamStop and have GamBan installed ... but it is annoying !
Thankyou mixer my family actually think me as a person actually cope with everthing well but its nice toget your advise
Thanks for the update Mixer, it felt good to read it and be part of the group. Thanks for the link you put in the update, it was really useful. I plan to start a recovery diary today and do plenty more reading on here. I'm on day 10 and feeling good!
Wow what a day yesterday was. Now that’s how I like to feel emotion when watching a game of football, not the sick feeling that you’ve done your b******s in again .I must say I’m really enjoying this World Cup so far. Took 2 week off to watch all the games. 0 temptation to place a bet which is how it should be.
Cheers for the update Mixer have a great week everyone
EXACTLY right, Godoicul!
Day 60! 40 to go to my target first milestone, yeah baby!!!
Can’t believe it let myself down today been doing so well and I feel sick with absolute guilt and also loss of money back to square one
Thx. Mixer and congrats. I have alot going on right now , such is life. tara
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