How many times do I have to tell me self there is no such thing as a winning streak.
I play roulette on the 500 machines amongst the other challenge games they include, pardon the facetious nature of my text, but although in jest I do crave to win jackpots.
the thrill of winning 100 went a long long time ago, it's sickening how the machines have made me devalue money, I mean I could easily plough through a 1,000 in 30 mins on the premise I just need the numbers to come in twice, I mean the machines are totally random...right?
anyway digression past the point.
when did 50 become a throw away and on the flip side.. I grudge the price of a chocolate bar in a comer shop... 70p for a mars bar you're having a laugh , but 5 mins later I've lost (or won) 1,000, oh I do know like you that for every 1,000 won there are 2 or 3 lost, but that's a distant memory. actually even when I win, unless the shop closes walking away when you're winning, it's just not done.. or can I.
I did set a challenge end of May no more machines, yeah sure keep the 20 per week on the lottery who knows..it might be you. 😉
You see I said did, end of May true to my word... even finished on a Plus 1,500 thought nice birthday for the kids sorted..
well it didn't work out I decided that it was appropriate to lose about 10,000 in less than 20 days, and each day sarted as win days, why cant I walk away when I double triple or even 12 times my initial stake. ever since debit cards in the bookie I have no control, it's not real cash is it...until the next couple of days.
I have it far easier than most, got a great job with little out going, my plan to save for a couple of years an buy a place went I mean I'll never get back to where I was 5 years ago, married with the kids jumping about...
I'm not blaming the gambling for the divorce, I didn't gamble that much when I was married, I was able to play the long game small stakes with tiny returns taking months to make a decent profit, but never losing... the problem with that is spending a whole heap of time spread betting and juggling between the betting shops and ensuring the automated systems are function...
anyways made about 50,000 playing it easy, then bang divorce I couldn't care less...lost the house the car and the kids... not that I fought or anything just gave in to the citation and said OK have it all. walked away and after a while dull existence became duller and duller. any way the bookie... playing high roller chucking 100 per spin to win 360, the thrill of seeing the money bank climb to 2,3 thousands in a matter of 5 minutes and then all of a sudden back at the counter asking for 200 more credit in the machine then another and another sometime emptying the bank account.
I have even tried to curtail my access to funds, but I have credit cards that allow me a cash advance (how silly) 15 months free interst well just the upfront 3% but hey who's counting.
now from+50,K a house a nice car great kids, hot wife to -25 K, and you know what... it's still manageable (in my tiny mind) how stupid can you get before you realise you're stupid...
2 years t's going to take to clear... so really do I have just one more spin to see if it gets wiped out in a day? Then I'll walk away
Hi sfmd
You are walking away now because you have come to this very supportive forum
Well done it can be the start of your new journey
To abstain and walk away from gambling that has taken so much away from you
Your comment on kidding yourself on all the debt and losses being still manageable that made me see red about myself cos I thought 20k plus was still manageable and it was not until I had no more at all to feed the addiction I stopped
Walk away now else it will take everything from you and that won't be manageable
I do wish you the very best on stopping because in the end it is the only way to go
Suzanne x
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