I've lost count how many times it's been now. I really thought I was doing better recently. I had barely thought about gambling at all for about 3 weeks. Then bam! A text from a casino I thought I was excluded from says I have 100 free spins to use. So I log in thinking, it's ok because it's free. Played down the spins and then the inevitable thought crosses my mind. 10 or 20 won't hurt. So i make a small deposit and I actually got up to £700 with my initial tenner and was thinking I could just withdraw this and pay off a chunk of some debt. But no of course I wanted 4 figures before cashing out. To cut to the chase, my 700 win became 500 loss. And that 1200 swing happened in about 20 minutes.
Why do I keep doing this to myself. These little thought of oh this won't hurt but in actual fact it's killing me. I'm drowning in debt and I keep adding to it regularly. I'm self excluded almost everywhere but I always seem to find a way.
I need to get rid of this disease and I don't know what else I can do to help myself.
MrHar
Hi MrHar,
Thanks for your post, and I hope you're finding the forum to be a supportive place. If you're gambling online, have you looked into any blocking software that would prevent access to gambling sites? Sites like K9, Gamban, and Betfilter would be worth looking into, and they might be able to offer you some protection. If you're doing this through your phone, some gamblers find that not having a smartphone is the best way to go, since not having access to the internet in your pocket can really offer you some relief.
Otherwise, have you thought about getting any group support through Gamblers Anonymous, or maybe getting any individual counselling? That could help you sort out better why you gamble like you do, and help you with ways to manage your urges more effectively. We've got partner agencies in many parts of the country that provide that at no cost, so if you wanted to get in touch with us on either the Helpline or Netline we'd be happy to look into that for you.
Hang in there, and I hope this helps.
Travis
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