A while back I posted about how I thought it was possible to 'control' a gambling habit.
I since found out it's not.
It's really not.
I've blown £30,000 since 2017 and barely managed to save my relationship because of online slots.
I tried setting monthly limits on what I would spend then regularly lost three times that amount chasing losses.
I tried setting 'time out' periods on my online account but found myself counting down the time until the exclusion ended. When it did I'd deposit (on average) £400 a time and a lot of the time I'd be up to £900 or £1000 but I'd never withdraw and would blow the lot.
I tried 'weaning myself off' by watching Youtube videos of slot players instead of doing the playing myself but it only made me want to play the slots myself.
Bit of a disaster really.
What might not be popular though is that I don't consider compulsive gambling to an illness.
While it certainly IS an addiction the fault doesn't lie with casinos or online slots, it lies with me.
My responsibility.
So I've gone down the route of self-exclusion from every site, shop and location I have ever joined. I've used software to block my online stuff additionally
It took a while to do but it felt incredibly positive.
And this is what I've learned and that I would humbly like to share:
There is no 'trick' to quitting.
No shortcut, no method, no technique and no easy answer.
I had to see this for myself. I wouldn't believe the posts I read here and the info on Gamcare
I thought I could find a better, easier way to quit
But there isn't one.
There IS really only one way and that's to block out temptation using self-exclusion and controls.
I genuinely believe that every gambler has to discover this fact for themselves.
You can read it over and over but until you get the point that you believe it in yourself you won't really 'get it'
I've finally 'got it'
It cost me thirty grand and I STILL have to make it stick
From what I read here that's cheap at the price
Please self-exclude, please block, please remove temptation
Best of luck.
My personal opinion is that you still don’t get it!
Illness or not, I don’t need you to agree, I am a sick person with a warped mindset when I am gambling...Stopping gambling didn’t help me, aside from the initial euphoria of a mini fist pump every day I chalked up on my day count, I was still mentally unwell. Today, with the help of GamCare (& the people I have “met” on the site), my loved ones & GA, & the work I have put in to adjust my mindset, I’m a happier, calmer person...Self exclusions don’t stop me being an addict, recovery stops me wanting to engage with my addiction.
You are right, there are no easy ways but I implore you, don’t think you’ve figured it out...There is NO cure, but there is a better way of living - ODAAT
I totally agree with ODAAT
Sadly your post scares the living daylights out of me, for you. I could of written it a thousand times over, I hope you are right but I also fear you are just having some time out, a breather.
If you want to gamble, you will find a way, putting blocks in place is good but not enough
Is it an illness, I'm not sure myself, an illness, a disease, I really dont know and personally I'm not too bothered, I do know it is behavioural
I'm early days in my current battle, just over 400 days gf, after 20+ years of solid addiction and hundreds of lightbulb moments, lots of stopping etc.
There really isn't just one way
I personally think the responsibility is mine, not anyone else’s.
My gambling problem is an addiction NOT an illness. There’s a difference. I’m not sick, I’m just addicted to gambling.
Does no one else here feel the same way?
The thought process of addiction isn’t exactly normal or healthy, is it?
If you take the word “disease” literally dis-ease, not or anti being at ease, doesn’t that describe addiction?
CW
That's a good point bluescreen
Each to his own eh?
I drove past a bookies today with £100 in my wallet.
Kept going (this time) so feeling motivated but only 3 days GF so time will tell.
Self-excluded and blocks in place
Taking responsibility this time
It really depends what type of personality you have
personally I agree with you the addiction is my problem with a product that I chose to use
nobody really cares if you blow 2,3 or 400 quid gambling its you that has to deal with the consequences of being skint and in debt for the rest of my life if you chose to do nothing about it
im sorry but fundamentally a gambling addiction isn’t a “ mental illness” its a bad habit or a personality flaw at best similar to over eating , smoking and drinking
how you then deal with it is up to you ……there are those of us that wish to sit down rationalise and say hey yeh I’ve had a problem with gambling I’ve created a lot of debt for myself I better sort myself out and get on with it
there are others who wish to class themselves as “sick” and spend the rest of their lives telling everyone how they got addicted to gambling because they were sick
I suspect this is some sort of coping mechanism perhaps to deal with the guilt or shame associated with losing money gambling
I also see the term “addict brain” bandied about an awful lot on this forum and im still not entirely sure what it means because people don’t suddenly wake up one morning with “addict brain”
any addiction will usually stem from a poor upbringing , trauma , lifestyle choice or greed
as with any hypothesis there will be those who disagree with the above and that’s fine ultimately you are the only one able to conquer your demons
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