I'm a 39 year old with a gambling problem. I finally admitted to myself and my family in march 2014 that I had a problem. I contacted breakeven which provided counselling support. this was going well until the counsellor started to tell me how much they had won at casinos etc. I didn't go back after that as didn't find that helpful!!
I stupidly relapsed in may 2014, thankfully I didn't get into further debt as I "won".
my husband and family have been very supportive. I have been to the doctor and asked to be referred to counselling through the gp, however locally they don't do the gambling support.
luckily since my relapse I haven't felt the urge to gamble as when I have been in a low mood or bored I have gone out of the house and visited family to talk to them.
I have changed my mobile phone number as I kept on getting phone calls and messages from casinos. I have also changed my email address to stop the messages. I have given my husband access to my bank account and any money that I manage to save I give him to look after.
I am still paying off the gambling debt that I accrued before that my husband let me take the money off the offset mortgage and I pay that back.
is there anything else I can do? I know this isn't something that i'll get over and it's with me for life. does writing a daily diary help?
I know I am one of the lucky ones as I have a large network of family and friends that I can talk to but sometimes I need to talk to someone that is a stranger. is this normal?
thank you for reading
Hi mjc!
Firstly, welcome to the forum and really well done on managing to abstain since your relapse - don't underestimate the difficulty of the first couple of months and don't beat yourself up about what happened in May.
I think what you're doing and the recovery foundations you've put in place are excellent. I run a "challenge" on this section of the forum and we did a survey a few weeks ago on the things that make the biggest difference in supporting sustained abstinence. Many of the things you are already doing came out highly on that list - it also included some demographics and you're in an age group and s*x where recovery chances are statistically high - the signs are good!
Onto your question.......I completely understand why you would want to engage with someone independent to your family and friends. My family have been amazing in the 7 months I've been stopped - their support, their care, their understanding has been unconditional.......however, they still don't truly "get it".......and I don't think unless someone has been there that they really would. I guess it's just like any addiction - experience of it is the key to understanding - both the thrills and the challenges.
When I first joined the forum I kept a daily diary.......over time this has slipped and the "challenge" is my main focus on the site. I'd urge you to have a look at the 2014 Challenge thread and go to page 316 at my "big" post. It's got the results of the survey in it. The diary really helped, but the challenge now helps me more - a kinda team spirit (there's about 42 of us in the challenge at the moment). Every week I do an update - have a read of a few and if you think it may help to be part of it then drop a post on there.
I think you're doing brilliantly well!! Keep it up.
Take care,
Mr Brightside
mr Brightside
thank you for your reply. I'm going to check out your challenge. I've told my husband about this, he is being fantastic with support etc, and he is encouraging me to check out the challenge also.
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