Tempted

Hi Hannah. It is uncanny how we all think it's easy money. We don't want to spend our hard earned money on normal things like fixing the heating, but we are happy wasting it on gambling.... I guess it is the whole package, the fix, the excitement and the money is a bonus. It seems that the easy money element is the trigger, when in reality if we'd have not gambled, fixing the heating wouldn't be a problem. 

In my younger days i would put £100,s of pounds in fruit machines to win £20 jackpot. If i count up all of the money i have lost gambling i would be a millionaire. I could never win my money back but i still go back to it to pay for a holiday or a treat or car repairs or fixing the heating. 

Do not gamble under any circumstances. It cannot be controlled for us. Do not be in the position i'm in at age 51 where i rent and will never own a house and have security and will probably never retire.....

Good luck

Hello Hannah. 

Congratulations on 5 months gamble free and respect to you for managing your finances in a sensible manner as well as having all blocks in place.

Unfortunately we are compulsive gamblers so will be tempted now and than but we only ever need to concern ourselves with staying gamble free today because tomorrow will not arrive until today is done and gone.

Wishing you an Easter Weekend of contentment and fun. 

A big thank you for visiting my diary. I appreciate your support. 

Aum ?

Hi all, 

Feeling quite positive today, I was advised to use a free credit score site to monitor how my score is doing after it being appalling. I’m glad to see it’s recovering as I pay off my debts and it’s nice to physically see progress even though I know it will be years before it’s back to a good level. The site has recommended Loqbox to me, a site that ‘lends’ you £2,400 for a year interest free and you pay £200 into it each month and the money is yours at the end of the year. Seemed like a good way to help build my savings back up, has anyone heard of it and knows if it’s as good as it seems?

Hope everyone is doing well.

Hello Hannah (and anyone reading this forum)

Glad you're feeling positive. Just wanted to remind forum users that we can't give financial advice here and anyone posting views about this product will be giving their personal opinions and experiences. 

You may be able to find out some information or reviews of this product through sources like Money Saving Expert or Money Advice Service. 

Best wishes

Deirdre
Forum Admin

Well it’s day 0 for the third time in a year. The lockdowns really helped me and knowing my card was blocked was great. When casinos reopened I thought I could become an ‘in person’ gambler and somehow my odds would be better. I went twice, I can’t remember when but both times since I last posted. I couldn’t use my card so I was limited to the £300 cash each time. Needless to say I walked out empty handed both times. They were set backs. I had another setback yesterday. I had been paid back for something in cash, plus a withdrawal of £300 meant I had £500 to go in with. I had a rubbish day with some bad news and thought if I could win something the day would be better. Again, I lost it all. £500 seemed a lot more than £300, I don’t know why. But I then got an email from PayPal, and I wondered whether any casinos accepted PayPal. Turns out they do. I put in £150, trying to get back to £650 got to around £570 and then lost it all. Put in another £400, lost it all far too fast. Put in another £350 (I have 9k in my bank account - you can see where this was headed). So all in all had £1400 at stake. After feeling horribly sick for a long time and not even enjoying the playing, I got back up. But I didn’t have £1400 I had £1411. I hate odd numbers. It’s ridiculous I know. I then lost the £11 but wanted it back, because I HAD had it. Such an awful mindset. Eventually I ended up on top for the day, and I withdrew at £1650. But it was 2am, I had to be up at 7, I was a wreck. And now I’m really scared of PayPal. I’ve spent a bit of time blocking myself from some of the casinos that use it. But will anything work more widely? Gamstop doesn’t seem to do all casinos unless I am wrong. I don’t play at the big names, mostly ones I’d never heard of. I searched ‘PayPal’ on here this morning and whilst shocked at the amount of debt people get into with money that isn’t theirs, I got really scared it could be me. The only saving grace is after the first £150 PayPal wouldn’t let me deposit directly, I had to put the money in the PayPal account but sadly I was more than happy to.

I’m worried for what’s next, but this ‘win’ didn’t make me happy, so maybe that’s enough for now?

Hi @hannah13

I'm not going to lie, that post was tough to read. It echos so much of what so many people through, including myself. Just because you didn't enjoy the gambling, doesn't mean you won't do it again. It didn't stop you this time and probably won't stop you in the future.

You need to take control. The blocks on your bank cards are great, but you have to couple it with willpower. Paypal is an awful thing for a gambler because you can't block gambling transactions on it and can get into quite a lot of debt with them. GamStop will help prevent you from gambling at some sites. All reputable, trustworthy websites are on GamStop. The shady ones aren't.

Install GamBan on ALL of your devices. You can get it for free through Gamcare. This blocks a lot of gambling websites. Even those shady casinos.

But ultimately, the only way to stop for good is to really want to. You have to be strong. Look into the GameChange course by Gamcare, which helps you understand your behaviours and triggers and how to resist them. You can beat this addiction, but you need to take action now before your £9k bank balance becomes a negative figure. 

I wish you so much luck with your recovery.

PayPal have limited my account which means the money I deposited and won back is stuck. I cannot prove I have a ‘supplier’ or ‘provided a service’ because I don’t. Hopefully once this is resolved it puts me off ever using them again and I’ll manage to tackle my problem. 

I have my money back this morning and have closed my PayPal account. I hope I can trust myself at some point but not yet. 

hope you’re all well. 

@hannah13 

I have just been reading your story and it all sounded very familiar. I'm still at the start of my journey... Aiming to get to 40 days at the moment. Some days are great... Others, not so. I have self excluded for 6 months but yesterday found myself counting down the days to be able to bet again. Worrying. Part of me (OK most of me) thinks I can only get out of debt by winning my way out. Crazy because every time I gamble I have no money. This is literally the first time in 4 months that on the 9th of the month I still have money in my account. Anyway, it would be great to hear how you're doing... Have you managed to stay free? Thanks for sharing