Why not GA (Gamblers Anonymous)?

Hi Sam, this is good to hear & o will be attending GA as soon as I am back in the country. I had read about the religious element & it made me feel uneasy so your point about using any higher power is good to know.

Thanks,
Redham

Hi Sam

Perhaps because addicts will look for the path of least resistance?

Perhaps because addicts will find 1001 reasons not to do something which takes them outside of their comfort zone.

perhaps.....because it works

Unfortunately the path of least resistance and operating within the comfort zone=business as usual

addiction requires radical and committed action.

Louis

Good points...
I've never felt I wanted to attend ga...
I've used here...my family and friends and gamcare couselling...
I've also looked at a lot of things about me aside from the gambling and changed the bits I was unhappy about. ..
I've read up on the steps a little on line.. and think that I actually am doing them sort of myself anyway....if that makes sense !
But....if I feel the need for whatever reason in the future I would go take a look...
For me....it's not about resisting or outside my comfort zone. ..
I've pushed myself daily and so far so good. ...
But like with any illness/problem/addiction....
There's lots of remedies that work...

Yeah , I tend to agree with Loxxie on that one , I'd not thought much about attending GA when I arrived here , to be honest it wasn't something that appealed to me very much but as I seemed to be doing just fine there seemed no need , I suppose it's down to the individual . I don't think Louis ever attended GA either , I may be wrong so apologies if I am but his way seems to be working as well , so It's probably more about the individuals needs and preferences .

I would never dissmiss it though as another tool should the need arise one day :))

Best wishes to all .

Good thread.

I went the GA route because I needed help. The only other option (apart from self therapy, which personally I think is dangerous remedy) is counselling. I did say that "counselling wasn't for me" even before trying it! Socan'tcomment on that one except for the fact more members in GA have spoke that counselling wasn't as good as GA meetings and finding a counsellor that you can truely open up to and one that understands was hard to find. A strength of GA is that everyone in that room is a compulsive gambler.

Like Sam Crow refers to about gambling and having terminal illness (my point and totally in agreement, once a CG you will never be cured, you only arrest the addiction, so terminal YES, because we cannot control our gambling). We only spoke about this last night in GA and I said these meetings "drip-feed" me whatever it is that has stopped me gambling for near 9 months. If it wasn't for GA I know for sure I'd be in a darker place. Even if I wasn't gambling my head would be full of all sorts you just can't discuss with anybody who doesn't care or understand.

All the best whatever route you take.

Sam Crow wrote:

Simple question - Why not try GA? So many new CG's get very sound advice when they arrive or return to the forum after a relapse and it usually includes going to a local meeting. This is often met with some sort of excuse 'it's just not my thing'. How do you know if you haven't tried it? Some would worry about the anonymity aspect and others find it too far to travel. I've also heard the religious theme being used as an excuse - GA is not connected in any way to a religious sect or denomination. The steps speak of God or a Higher Power as you understand him - this can be anything or anyone. Some have their children or partners as Higher Power's for example.

Personally I put off going to GA for years mainly because I thought I didn't need it and was still in denial about my addiction. It was the best decision I've made in a long time to finally give it a go. I was met with a warm welcome and advised to give it 90 days (gamble free and attend meetings whenever I could - usually once a week for me). After that it was up to me to decide to continue with the GA programme or go back out to the gambling world. The way I look at it is if I had a terminal illness which required 60-90 mins treatment a week to keep it at bay and help me lead a normal life I would drive or commute anywhere in the country for it. GA is where I go to get my treatment.

As for anyone who has tried GA and felt it wasn't for them, fair enough - at least you gave it a go! It's about finding what's right for us even if it's difficult to begin with, nobody said it would be easy.

No they didn't say it would be easy, although with this progressive illness it appears to be much easier for some than others. If you don't need help from the like of GA, i'm happy for you, but if you are addicted and need options, give GA a fair chance.

Louis your comments are bang on:)

I think its a good idea to stand somewhere and say this is me and I am a compulsive gambler.

Many years ago however I wasnt ready for GA and found it quite heavy. I was quite shy and some of the stories there were so serious it scared me really. I have twisted memories of a dark and forboding room. I was an addict but I didnt see myself in the same category as others. Couldnt handle it because I had a twisted view that I was a la di da light gambler who shouldnt be there listening to stories of life savings stolen and all sorts

That was my mistake and as I just said I wasnt mentally ready to do it or even quit gambling. I have to be deadly honest here and say I thought these people have serious problems but I dont. I found it scary at the time like I was a dabbler in with the big boys

Again my error and my mistake

This thread reminds me that I always had a problem and in the mid 1990s I tried to combat it but gave up far too easily. I was scared delusional and half hearted then though....more a false pride that I can handle it before I reach some of the stories I heard there. I didnt feel above anybody but I was awkward in the situation and found it too much. To be honest and I must be honest I didnt think my stories were worthy to tell when I had heard others speak.

My view now is that they do a good thing and every avenue must be explored with an open mind. What I do now is doctors counselling, full reports to my family. Good blocks and extended blocks wherever I am working or travelling past..monitoring of all finances by my family and reading/taking part in this forum.

I wont rule it out and GA is an avenue I would like to explore further now. I have a feeling the local group will be in the nearest city as I would love it to be more local

Just my thoughts

Best wishes

That's an interesting post JD and all the more so for your honesty.

I feel like I missed a trick not attending as I like the idea of connecting with people on a deep level. I like the idea of connecting with people for that moment of being in a room, regardless of background, regardless of whether you ordinarily would have time for that person.

I think my original excuse was that I was superior to the average GA attendee - obviously I had no evidence to back up this stereotype of the typical GA person - I'd created some kind of image and I was definitely better than that image. Obviously this was all part of my deluded mind.

Maybe after a year of abstaining, when I started being more introspective, it started to appeal a lot to me. Then a year and a half ago I got into ACT, which seems to share similar ground with the Steps (from what I can gather). But by then it sort of felt too late. Like it might be a bit smug turning up having not gambled for quite a while. I can still realise this is probably an excuse, but I don't have the drive.

I advocate GA, not as an attendee, just as a neutral observer. Having been on these boards for quite a few years, it's patently obvious that it works. It's not guaranteed but the comparative success versus other methods, particularly simple abstention, must be enormous. Before anyone pipes up to use themselves as an example of how doing it their own way works...hold fire.. I'm by no means saying GA is essential. So this isn't having a dig at doing it 'your way'. But statistically, you would be increasing your chances enormously by attending.

Just to clarify, I have no hidden agenda in favour of GA - it's jsut apparent that it works. It's a shame there isn't the solid data to back up what I'm saying. Then again, it's not that surprising. Who's going to pay for the research? Certainly not the gambling industry, why would they want to do anything which highlights a technique that works?

Actually.... hang on a minute, the government should f&8king pay!

Louis

To answer the end of Louis's question. I think Dan answered a while back. I believe he said there wasn't much data as they're an anonymous organisation.

I tried ga myself one time and I found my first time to be really good. Completely the opposite to what I always thought it would be
No smoke filled room's full of suited people looking all gloomy.
All generally happy people. I was surprised how mixed the group was I would say probably 3 more males than female in a group of 18.
But ga didn't fail for me. I failed in the first thing they asked me to do. And that was come back the following week.
The following week my wife talked me out of going as it was our little girls dance show.
The week after I worked late.
By then I was to embarrassed to go back. My ego told me I would be fine. Which followed up with a relapse. I'm still looking for an alternative group as I'm still to embarrassed to go back. But I would go back. And I can see why people speak so highly of it
Bit of a ramble as usual

Deano sometimes i could just kiss you with great comments like that. Others shake you. Let go of your ego & go back to wolverhampton, they wont judge

Deano, Deano,Deano...big sigh!! If you'd come on and said you'd tried it and it wasn't for you then I'd say fair enough. But to say it was really good, that you got something out of it, that you wanted to go back...and then to not go? And to be looking for a different group even though you liked the first one? I don't think it's ego getting in the way. Ego implies that you think you're better, that you know best and you'll do it your way. That's not what I'm hearing from you. I'm hearing "I'm embarrassed" "what will they think" "I'll be judged". Why will they be any different to anyone on here? Me and you have both come back here after f*****g up, but we were welcomed back warmly. I don't doubt the ga meeting will be the same. Dig deep and go for it. You know it works xx

GA is one of those things you cannot knock until you've tried. I was always so skeptical about going and used to just make excuses. Around a year ago i went after my girlfriend asked me too where i went to one session and never went again. Around 5 weeks ago i relapsed and when i handed my finances over to my girlfriend including online banking details i suggested to go to GA where i have now been going twice a week for the past 5 weeks. I can honestly say i look forward to going and speaking about everything to likeminded people. Several members have been going for over a decade and are still going to this day as they believe if they stop they will fall back into gambling. I see these people as an inspiration and has really helped me deal with everything. All i can suggest to anyone reading this is to at least try not just one meeting but try at least a few before you make your decision. You need to WANT to go not be forced to go because you will just make excuses. Members tell me they would be dead if it wernt for GA so please just try it and it may even save your own life in the long run.

A kiss from Dan. And a telling off from lb. Twigh light zone maybe?
Both comments are spot on
Thank you