hi, i've finally taken the steps to stop gambling. Joined this site tonight after chatting online to an advisor. Been going out of my mind with anger/worry/resentment and I can't speak to family. I've just gambled all of my overdraft and there is a week until payday. What is worse is im going on holiday in 4 weeks and have already gambled what spending money I had saved. I will now be relying on my overdraft again and I am petrified the bank will see my gambling withdrawals and stop my overdraft - I am petrified every time the post comes or the phone rings. I am so stupid for getting in this position.
Hi Mikey and well done for taking the step of speaking to someone and opening a diary on here. I first posted Monday just gone and it's doing me the world of good.
Like me it sounds like your not in debt in a big way but your contiually blowing your wages & overdraft. I did the same. Kind of made myself believe I had it under some sort of control but I hadnt.
If you can find the time read some of the diaries, the stories behind some on here really pull at the heart strings. I'm sure it will make you realise how 'lucky' you are.
Along with other things its has given and will continue to help me.
wise words from someone on here.......I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP
Dave
Thankyou for your post Dave.
2 whole days without a gamble now but I'm not feeling good about it yet. The reason is I have maxed out my overdraft and don't have 2 pennies to rub together - so not sure if I haven't gambled because I don't want to or because I can't. After my last gamble I was £600 up and luckily I withdrew it...just waiting for it to go into the bank...scared of what I will do then. My mum wants to go visit my sister tomorrow but there is no petrol in the car and not entirely sure how I will get out of it...will I fane illness? Oh the lies begin again!!!!I dream of the day I am debt free
Hi Mikeyd--best thing to kick you off is stop the lies and come clean mate.
If you have to rely on lies you will get caught out so honesty is definitely the best policy. You will get loads of help on here if you really want to change.
Keep reading and posting but remember there is no magic wand that we can wave and change has to come from within.
all the best
Stumper
Thankyou Stumper...I am determined to change. The days seem so long however and I am not back in work for 6 weeks! My greatest enemy is boredom..I am going to post on here everyday as just the process of typing seems to help get my head in order
Mike
Well done so far.
Have you self excluded yet from shops and sites? If not, do it, puts in that buffer. When you get the money, if you havent anywhere of your usualy accesses to gambling then you cant, try and make it difficult for yourself. The more of an effort it becomes the more time you give yourself to think no i'm not going to gamble and less impulsive it will become.
You'll need passport size photos to self exclude in shops so get them done before you go in.
Dave
Thanks Dave. I have never been to a shop...my habit is online casinos. I have excluded myself but have always just found other casinos eager to take my money in the past...they are not going to beat me this time though
Hi and a huge welcome to this very supportive forum - we are all in the same boat as you - lies, worries, split personalities, the list goes on.
But what really does matter now is that you have made this decision to CHANGE for the better.
It won't be easy especially to start with and you have 6 weeks free time coming up. You really need to think of something to keep you occupied - painting, running, write a book, cycling, post here, visit family, etc. Once you have thought of something, STICK TO IT!
Your first targets will be to get through these tough first few days then the whole of the 6 weeks. Trust me, you will feel LOADS better when you get through those 6 weeks and you will be all set up for a very positive future.
If I were you (but I'm obviously not!) I would come clean. That will be incredibly hard but it will be a massive weight off your mind.
You will beat this, mate, just stay strong and stay positive!
N
day 3 - not a good day.
What its like to be penniless and struggling to think of ways to get money in the bank to cover bills. Today i took out what little is in my credit card to put in the bank, now thats maxed out. Still waiting for the casino to put money in my bank and that isnt happening so looks like ive been stung there. To top it all off I went to the gold shop to sell my £900 chain I bought in Turkey and guess what....its worthless...another lesson learned. HOW HAVE I BEEN SO STUPID?? Applied for a loan, it was a 'no' of course! and now all I need is a nice letter from the bank saying they are cancelling my overdraft, just waiting for that one. In the meantime, my mum is constantly going on about how much she is looking forward to Florida in 4 weeks and I know I don't have 2 pennies to rub together..I have had to tell my mum and her response is 'it's your own stupid fault'. She is in the process of ringing round the whole family now telling them how stupid I have been. Day from hell!
On the positive side, all this stress is making me adamant that I am not gambling again!
day 4
Yesterday was a very low day and the weather didnt help. Feeling more positive now but I have only just got up. My resolve for not gambling is so strong, perhaps fuelled by my new found hatred towards online casinos.
I can't believe it's been 5 years since my last post. Reading them back was depressing...I was in such a bad place.. I am happy to say I haven't been in an overdraft for over 4 years now and I have almost paid off credit cards...about 5 grand to go (was over 18 grand!!!). I came back on tonight because I have started gambling with more intensity lately and I really don't want to go back to 2010. Hopefully just typing these words will get my determination back
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