2010

Hi Jas

Hope you are ok after yesterday. Please post and confirm.

P is away and all laptops are passworded so I have had to go to the library. I think that even if he gave me the passwords I wouldn't be at risk and so I will ask him for them later when he calls me.

I have come a long way in my recovery and to be honest I'm really proud of myself. I remember my counsellor telling me not to let anything or anyone get in the way of my recovery and that is my plan...full stop.

I would like to apologise for any upset caused on Sunday evening. There were lots of contributory factors ands so I will leave it at that.

I forgot to thank you for your kind posts 🙂

Jas x

The weather is gorgeous here today so out into the garden it is

P has given me the passwords...trusted me with them. I feel really happy about this, trust in a relationship is imperative and it's still something I need to earn.

Today has been lovely...possibly because the sun is shining, such a motivator.

P is away for quite a while and it is a bad time really. It is the anniversary of losing our girl and so it can be a bad time, for us both and all my family. I may take my relative up on her invite, thing is she is in Stranraer and it's one hell of a journey. Will think about it though, as long as there is no snow!

No gambling for Jas

Bye for now xx

Hi Jas

What a great life you have, lounging about in the garden and browsing the library.

By the way, I have read every sports book the library has to offer in recent years!

Given my problems. amazing to think of CGs who've never gone into bookies, I kinda thought before coming on here that was the start point for most folk years ago before the online stuff existed.

I'm sure you'll be fine with the laptop passwords.

Your song wasnt a repeat!

Garden Of Love

Hi jas,

you alwasy have some positive stuff goin on,i know i have been making more of an effert to see family& friends instead of the casino...alot more fun!

Best Wishes

micheal42

Hi Jas

Glad to see you are ok and so happy P has trusted you with the passwords 🙂 Big step forward and I know how good that feels.

Its a pleasure to see you so positive today, I have no idea what went on in chat but whatever it was sounds like you have achieved a lot by putting it behind you.

All I will say is that with a bunch of cyber friends who are in reality often strangers in a highly charged state ie fighting this demon, perspective and good sense can fly out of the window sadly.

I think we can be too wrapped up in our own problems to see clearly sometimes.

I hope you are missing P but in a good way...I know you will be, just think how uch you will appreciate each other when he gets back.

Thinking of you

love

W xxx

ty for your encouragement its so great to not be alone in this.

gl x

Glad I made you laugh Jas,

Didn't realise what a sad day it is for you today *hugs*. My R is away too, and I know how helpful that arm around the shoulder can be, when you are going through ouchy feelings.

The sun was lovely today wasn't it! Summer is coming you know! wont be long 🙂

Take care,

f x

jasmine. . Losing your girl anniversary. So Sorry to hear that. . You ve had so much bad luck in your life that its hard to takeit all in. .hopefully each day bet free is a shining light for you. . Good of P to give you them passwords. . Dont think the trust thing is ever in doubt nowadays. . Anyway have a nice day and keep up the great work you do on these diaries. .

Hello,

Going to go off for a few days to Scotland. Just printed the route map off...gawd help me. So I am packing me and my dogs off to stay with my relatives....they live in Stranraer, bit of a way out but so beautiful. They are up in the h i l l s and overlooking the sea......there is no light pollution and so you can see stars everywhere...quite magical actually.

I had to tell a fib though. I was asked why i wasn't flying up......I didn't dare say I had no funds and so I used the dogs as an excuse to explain why I was driving.

Ok...so I have to check the oil and water and tyre pressures aaarggg....help me 😉

For some who don't know...P and I have two adopted daughters....they are both in OZ now working as Doctors. Anyway, one has been promoted and I am so full of joy I can't begin to tell you. Brimming with delight. One day I may go into more detail as to the circumstances surrounding their adoption...they were 13 and 14 and wild. Anyway...all history now and the sun is deinitely out for both of them. Pure joy.

There will be no gambling where I am going....just knitting lol

Stay strong everyone....love to all my friends

Jas xx

To add.

I have the t.v on whilst packing. Several online gambling adverts. At the moment I have all the components available to me to allow me to gamble. I have the time....P is away. I have cash in the bank account as dd's haven't been taken and I have a computer.

I can honestly say I have not one ounce of desire. Thought I would record this.

Anyway...must shoot off.

Not an ounce of desire. Good stuff and that`s how I feel:).

enjoy your relaxing break in stranraer jasmine. . Think the nearest airport (prestwick) is fair car journey away anyway and who s to say you can get a flight there from your local airport. . No Ounce of desire to gamble now thats confidence lass. . As for them adverts they should be banned like cigarettes. . Keep up the good work and enjoy your time away. .wp.

Hi Jas i am just popping into diaries of all those people who have helped me in acheive 4 months of g free. Thought i would read where you are at. I live in Scotland and i hope you enjoy your visit. In addition i see you have two adoped children. My step daughter has two adpoted children and i always think it takes a real special person to adopt so well done it shows your courage and heart. God bless you