Back to square one .. Regaining my freedom

M.f.

Keep your chin up. As long as you never stop stopping. Keep going and you will beat this once and for all. I recently slipped and find myself back at the beginning but I am back on the right path and this fills me full of excitement. I know there is only good things ahead of me. Forgive yourself for the past while and focus on becoming a better you for the days, weeks and months ahead. This is your life and your worth it.

Tomso.

Today I will not gamble.. as simple as that. This shouldn't be so hard, one day at a time 🙂

Stay strong everyone

Today I will not gamble.. as simple as that. This shouldn't be so hard, one day at a time 🙂

Stay strong everyone

Hey myfreedom,

Nice job in picking yourself right back up and giving it a go again. One day at a time, and you will make it happen.

Great job.

Chicagoguy

This is my final chance to regaining my life back, I will just put everything behind, it is the only way forward. No more thinking about the past, its gone for ever. Forward to a new life , one better than it's ever been!

I am really excited, this time I will succeed !

Don't know how many on this board are experiencing gambling withdrawal symptoms, I come to realize that these are as real as with any other drug, it being substance abuse, alcohol or any other type of addiction. I did not believe it , was just feeling so depressed after losing or going through a long period without a bet. But after I documented myself quite a bit I realize gambling withdrawal is so real!

Ok, so I was clean for a period of 2-3 months maybe through the Xmas holidays and just after new year started gambling on and off , ever since I haven't been motivated to do pretty much anything work wise, just went with the wave.. I've been to the gym went out quite a lot (have to mention in October I started a psychiatric treatment ) but haven't been able to keep up with work ever since after new year. I mostly feel fatigue , boredom, lack of confidence, self Estéem, I feel like even if I wold be able to maintain my work schedule it would be not worth it. What is going on with me I am not sure, but I am almost sure these are withdrawal symptoms from gambling, since when I gamble, when I am there (in action) these symptoms fade away! d**n machines take all my depression away and make me feel alive. Unfortunately for casino owners I will not need their services any longer, I will confront the problem instead of finding an escape route that will only pull me into the dirt worse.

Stay strong everyone

Stay stong and true to yourself, you can do this one day at a time. Suddenly you look over your shoulder and wonder why you ever did it!

I believe in you, I believe in you- you should too xxxxx

Kitj

Just came back from the casino, blew off 2400$, as usual the money doesn't even matter but the fact that I lost, that I gambled again.. I need some advice here.. it hurts me a lot that my gf has distanced away from me a lot .. and this is what I believe keeps me gambling, when I stop she doesn't still seem to trust me and be my same girl again.. will she ever be the same? will she ever love me again?

I don't know what I've become.. what is going on with me.. day by day I live the pain of gambling .. the effects it had over me, I am living an empty life: no motivation, no happiness, no much pleasure into much anything, this d**n addiction has emptied me totally, I cannot live anymore with tha pain it has caused me..

When will I ever recover?

My gf is so distant, never wants to have s*x with me, always refuses kissing me, and always tells me she cannot do anything more than she has ever done (which is very little to be honest) Should I end this painful relationship ? What is your opinion?

Thank you for reading..

Stay strong everyone.. the trick here is no bets .. simple as that .. I learn it day by day it becomes easier to fully understand.. NO BETS is the trick to coming clean of this DRUG.

Hey myfreedom,

It's ok, pick yourself back up, and dust yourself off, and start over again. You asked for advice so here's mine to you, take it for what you may. I would enroll yourself in some group therapy for gambling, and if your no longer doing the 1 on 1 anymore, get back to it soon. You need to find the strength within yourself to move on in life gamble free, don't try to get that strength from your girlfriend because she's not a compulsive gambler like us. If you truely love this woman then you have to give her time to trust you again, she sounds like she doesn't want to be hurt anymore. Find motivation and pleasure in not gambling, turn that into your drive. Focus on yourself, because without fixing our addiction were no good to ourselves or anyone for that matter. You can do this, stay strong, come on here and post often seek advice, let it all out. I'am new at this also, and finding my way through the ups and downs of being a compulsive gambler, I lean hard on my therapist for guidance in these trying days. Believe in yourself and put your mind to it, only we can make the decision to stop betting. I wish you the best and hope some of this helps you in your journey. Read my thread under "chart of compulsive gambling and recovery" all of it.

Sincerely,

Chiacgoguy

P.S. It's in the intros forum

Chicagoguy

This addiction has brought me to a stage where I just feel I have done everything I possibly could, but this feeling is just because of the emptiness it has left me with, lack of motivation and willpower to go on further on this journey called life.

I start learning that gambling is not the real thing in life, the ups and downs it comes with are not natural, it's not what normal people (people who don't gamble) go through on their journey. These ups and downs that come with gambling are so fake, just look how short lived their are especially the ups. You win a certain amount and you are on the up, but for how long, it hasn't lasted for more than few days for me at most. It is not the real satisfaction in life, not the real deal.

I Am very depressed lately , and start feeling guilty again I recon for gambling again. I'm just looking forward for the real deal, and not using gambling as a way to cope with life problems. I will just not accept this any longer. It has caused me so much pain, and simply I cannot believe where it has led me. I should have been a healthy successful young man , and what am I ?

Even a few months off gambling has proved to change the way I see life and I react to different things. Why not be totally free of this disease?

It is a disease and one powerful one, that we can cure !

Stay strong everyone

It's been only 24 hours since I last gambled but I already feel more positive comparing to if I would have continued gambling and probably would eventually lost everything I have. My money is now secured in my moms account and not willing to ask for more in order to gamble.

What is lost, is lost and I'm not looking to recover any more of the losses. This addiction as I've mentioned before has left me with an empty feeling and no motivation to do pretty much anything. I am at a point where I do not even care if I've showered or taken care of myself. Days go on and on and nothing seems to change much. But I did continue to gamble. Would have probably been feeling a lot better if I just didn't place a bet in the past 3 months since I've started again. I felt the urge and I just gave in, needed the rush. I came to the conclusion that this rush is satisfied once in action but doesn't last for long. Why would I continue doing it if its not long term satisfaction anyhow, just for a few hours of adrenaline just to end up losing, and feeling more depressed than before. It is simply not worth it.

I met a guy in this casino I've gambled in the past period who truly inspired me to stop this altogether. He is simply devastated by gambling. He told me that he once had quite a bit of money available and was betting the same as me maximum bet until all money is gone. He just likes the thrill, the buzz gambling gives him, and this has kept him coming to the casino till this day. Now he doesn't have much money to gamble but its the same feeling for him even playing small bets. In other words he bets as much as he can afford just to feel the buzz. It's crazy what he told me about his career in showbiz. He used to have a well paid job which he has lost due to gambling, lost his girlfriend due to gambling and what not.

I have lost enormous sums of money and my biggest regret is that I've lost the only property I ever owned, a cozy 30 Sqm studio apartment which I much loved. But since losing all these I have continued gambling through out January February and march hoping I will recover the money lost, that i had from selling my apartment, this was my target and then I'd stop. I don't think I would therefor there will not be a next bet, I do not want to know what the next bet will bring, what the next card will be, it is way too dangerous for me at this point. Now every loss for me becomes harder and harder to tolerate and accept so I don't want to end up up not being able to cope with the loses any more... It would be crazy to risk my health and even myself this way.

In other words I still have myself, I haven't lost "me" and this is huge. I will not give in to this addiction. Onwards to a better me and future.

Stay strong everyone

Almost heading to bed.. had a few glasses and pushed myself to work for a few hours .. no motivation at all still but looking forward and working on regaining my motivation back.

I will start of with a planned quit smoking plan. Tomorrow I will smoke the last cigarettes remaining and will quit them for good (will help myself a bit with the ecigs I have purchased this last weekend)

Wich me luck on my quit. I've wanted to quit smoking for a long time, this will be a challenge !

Keep strong everyone!

Good luck on stopping both vices fella.

I stopped both gambling and smoking in February. I really feel that they both go hand in hand - by stopping smoking you automatically have more energy and get up and go.

I actually smoked over the weekend but I've stopped again so this was just a blip and I'm not too down about it. However I know that any relapse into gambling could be disasterous, finance wise, and simply cannot happen.

I remember thinking before I stopped smoking that I could never really be happy not smoking. Realise now this is total rubbish and the addiction playing with your mind.

Good luck