Back to stay

Hi

Just wanted to drop a note on i think really to be honest.

Joined last week an just don't trust myself, self excluded and invested in blocker which seems to be working.

5 days now gf which is strange as was football on line which averaged 20quid with weekend late night on line casino ( fruits) .

I feel much better in myself although in writing this still thinking about it to much.

Fingers crossed.

Hi Tinyb well done on staying gf keep going we can do it 🙂

Reallllyvbusy day went to see my son and then my grandson, took him out to a play Centre he loved it. Didn’t have time to think about gambling until now. Made such a difference having money in my pocket to help my son out and treat my grandson. It used to be so difficult to find the money for them when I was gambling also transferred money to my granddaughters mum to treat her as she won a Christmas card competition bless her. So good not to struggle doing that. So very tired now though not having very good nights sleeps but hopefully that will improve the less I’m stressed etc over gambling. Paid some debts too and got car cleaned properly inside and out, that had taken a back seat when gambling. It’s crazy what ends up taking a back seat when your gambling and that’s all you can think about to spend your money on. Getting urges tonight despite all that positivity a long way to go yet I think. Keep going ppls

4 days thought it was 5 but still amazing 4 days rarely could I go a day gf, where did I find the money???? Ridiculous no more

5 days but not having good day been going through my banking deposits and the amount is unbelievable how much I spent over lnast month gambling I timesed that by the amount of years gambling and the amount is horrendous how do you get your head around that? I’m. Gutted. But happy at least now I’m gf. Need to sort my head out as all I want to do now is the old chase my losses but looking at that figure that’s impossible

Hey lulu, I don’t post very often but wanted to wish you well, you know you can do this, draw a line under the losses and take each day at a time . I know it’s not easy but the rewards of not gambling are so worth it and I’m not just talking about cash in the bank, building society or your purse . it’s that weight lifted off your shoulders as you wake up in a morning and realise you lost money you didn’t have, it’s about being with loved ones and giving them your full attention as your minds not else were. It’s about liking the person who looks back at them in the mirror . Keep knocking mr g out when he rears his head, take up colouring, jigsaw puzzles anything to distract when the urge arises to spin those awful wheel. Best wishes x x

Hi Lulu

You're doing great! Try and not look back, You can't change the past however you are in control of today!

Be kind to you, as anon said - do anything to distract yourself from those urges. They will pass, they're only thoughts...dont act on them!

Just for today - stay safe

S&B xx

Hi Anon100 thank you I really appreciate your advice it gives me such a boost especially when I’m struggling like today. I cleaned my boat from top to bottom lol (live on narrowboat) and took out my frustrations on that, it’s very clean! Lol. I’m going to take up my hobbies again too. Thanks Anon hope your all good x

Hi SJB thank you again such a boost to get these messages of encouragement. I’m starting to get my head round the losses, I cleaned like a mad woman today lol it definitely helped lol hope your all good too x

Waiting for my 6 days to come up on my page. Tough day really getting my head around losses still not there yet but much better than I was, learning to draw a line under it all. Cleaned like a mad woman today to take my mind off urges. Working extra on cover too this week so that’ll help a bit. Still got cash which is hard to get used to to be honest so used to being broke by now and borrowing etc. Be so good to have a better Christmas and no more waking up those mornings feeling awful, depressed etc etc having lost money just can’t afford to lose. Nearly 6 days of waking up free and it’s bloody good. I’ll deal with those urges and stop ruining my life and those around me.

Keep thinking about this bit of advice ‘just a thought, don’t act on it’ 6 days really struggling today but doing it

Hi Lulu,

Keep riding thoughts out. Have you got any practical blocks in place? Self exclusions at least..every little helps!

This is not easy but definitely doable. Wouldn't it be nice to see full g free week tom huh ☺..keep building those days up, I can assure you the further away you move, them more your thought process will keep changing.

& of course...thoughts are not gonna harm you, actions might. Please make the right choice!

Keep busy and if not busy, take time for self care. Nice book or creative cooking ☺

You can do this - in fact - you ARE doing this!..well done!

S&B xx

Thanks SJB great boost for me! Yes I have cash only bank card and have self excluded to the max. I slipped 6 days ago by actually going in a bookies just to play my most lowest point I think because online your ‘anonymous’ but the bookies ppl see you I still can’t believe I did it never ever again I self excluded anyway. My ‘choice’ is online slots that’s what really has me hooked totally. I’ve kept myself busy today with work and what I call my winter clean lol. I can’t seem to find an interest yet in any of my previous hobbies though apart from reading. I’m hoping that will come back like it has done before. Yes seeing 1 week will be amazing! Thanks SJB x

Keep going Lulu. It takes time to find what else we can do with our time away from gambling. After being so consumed by gambling we get a bit lost in ourselves. Takes a while to find out who we are again. Im only just starting to now after 10 weeks (tomorrow) GF. Let it just happen and find peace in the fact you are allowing yourself to start looking at yourself to ask the questions of what you really value in life. Its a big question!

All the best

Nearly 1 week. I’m having thoughts and even though the blocks I’ve put in place stop me initially I know there’s things I can do to get round them but and that’s a big but the time it would take to get around those blocks gives me the breather I need to resist those thoughts, they pass and I’m going to get stronger every day gf. This time is definitely different, I’ve gone back to gambling so so many times after a period gf thinking stupidly that my ‘luck’ would change that I deserved a bit of luck after not gambling, also periods of stress weaken my resolve, boredom, escape. Basically I have to address a few issues in order to stay gf. As soon as that blanket self exclusion of all sites comes out I’m joining. I’ve self excluded to the max right now but the gambling devil on my shoulder is whispering there might be a new site, why don’t you search? Technology is amazing but it has its dark side. I feel contemplative tonight, wondering why and how online slots got me so bad. I’ve watched part of that video and it’s going a long way to explaining this awful addiction. Going to watch rest tomorrow. Nearly 7 days, 1 whole week gf!