Being honest with who I am and what I've done..

Well done Mr Honest, keep racking up those days 🙂

I think for some people money is a root cause. I saw someone post here a while back about money anxiety which can fuel urges to gamble - which personally makes sense to my circumstance. I got hooked by a BIG win and the ability to earn thousands in several seconds and buy everything you want to.

Once that runs dry, I believed I craved that feeling and over time because addicted to the feeling of being rewarded free spins or a bonus game as I knew it could come with big money. Eventually it got to the point where I could win £1000 from a £5 spin and gamble it away because I wanted to get the next free spins or the next bonus round. Crazy really!

So I'm trying to work on setting small financial goals to tackle that money anxiety, with a big focus on self treats. I have a savings account entirely to spend on myself every 6 months. And trying to get into exercise to slowly channel those cravings for a big win. Small steps, I guess.

Keep going! How did you find the group session? I am looking into doing it but I'm slightly daunted of speaking about this to a whole group of strangers oddly! I think it's quite difficult to say out loud even though I already know (and tell myself) I am an addict.

Hi Adam,

Don't be daunted by it! Everyone else is in exactly the same boat. I can understand the trepidation going in but within a few minutes you'll feel comfortable and will relate to so many of the things you hear.

I always feel really positive just after I've finished and it's crazy how quick the time goes..

Good luck!

Initially , I really wasn't too concerned about " Why " I gambled I just knew I needed it to stop but as times moved on I have reflected on what was the big attraction ? .

Some of it was initialy down to wanting to win afew quid extra to supplement my income and as it fitted in pefrectly with the strange hours I work it was something I could pick up or put down anytime I wanted . It then after some bigish wins it became the chase of more because of the buzz it gave and as the f and Fs liken what we do to having an affair when they find out perhaps it was like that for me also , a place that I could go and be in my own world with my gambling mistress which then concludes that I wasn't happy in my marriage again which was partly true .

Jeez !! that spiralled a bit didn't it ?

So I guess I still don't know is the answer from me but I'm glad I stopped will do for now :))

Day 29.

Hi everyone.. just checking in! Not much to report. Busy at work and not really given gambling much thought.

On a rather tight budget for the next billion months but it's great to not be counting the seconds to payday.

Hope everyone else is staying strong.

Day 37.

No gambling and zero urges. I've not really even thought about gambling except during my counselling session earlier in the week! Feel a bit c**P when I see the tiny budget I'm surviving on but it's not the end of the world.

One thing I have realised in the past few days though is how unhappy I am with my career and what I spend the majority of my life doing. I'm just not challenged enough and wish I did something I loved.

Could this be why I've put off tackling my gambling for so long? After all, when I'm in the depths of this addiction I just want the simplest job ever that a blindfolded monkey could do because I don't have the energy to focus on anything else!

Interested to hear what you guys think..

Thanks for listening.

Hi Mr H :)) .

It's amzing what gambling actually hold's you back from doing , you begin to wonder if youv'e stropped yourself from reaching your full potential if I'm honest . I've been a couple of years gamble free now and have spent that time amongst other things' really focusing on getting my business up to speed and I can't believe the difference a bit of time investment has made to my turnover :)) .

You start questioning things more because you now have the time too , instead of filling your hours with anything gambing related I can understand you questioning yourself over your career , maybe now that voids there you need another bigger challenge to fill it ? .

Maybe it's time to set yourself a challenge and look for something more fullfilling to do with your new gamble free life ?

The money situation will improve my friend it just take a while for thing's to filter through , and at least your now not making thing's any more difficult by gambling :))

Congrats on the 37 day's of winning :))

All the best for now

Alan

Thanks Alan, great comments as always and lots for me to think about!

Day 50.

Half way to my initial target of 100 days and feel really proud of the progress I'm making.

Have said to myself as soon as I mark off the last 'x' on 100, I'll rip down the wall chart, print a new one and go again. This isn't just about 100 days.. it's me changing for the rest of my life.

Counselling has been really helpful and I'm really keen to get some more permanent support organised such as long term sponsor or just anyone I can pick up the phone and call when I'm struggling to deal with stuff. I've realised how much it helps talking but it isn't always easy to act on that.

Hope everyone else is winning their own battle..

Thanks for listening.

Glad that you're doing well so far. Thanks for commenting on my post recently and it's always helpful knowing people have had similar experiences. Keep up the good work! Being completely honest really is the most difficult but best option for sure.

Day 100!

To anyone out there thinking it can't be done, it can.

Thank you to all those who have and continue to support me including the great support services I've used through Gamcare.

I just wish I gave it this much effort, honesty and dedication previously..

Welcome to the century club Mr Honest 🙂

Thanks ODAAT.

And for your previous advice too..

Let's make it to 200!!

Thank you for posting thw letter to your girlfriend it has inspired me to the same with my husband. I think i csn only beat this is im totally honest. Im very scared though he has no idea and ive got us in so much debt.

Well done to you!

Heva

You won't regret it Heva162..

Well done for taking the biggest and most important step.