Can’t do this anymore...

Thanks for the words of advice. I will when I’ve sat down and looked at all of my finances. 

So end of day 2 and no gambling thoughts. Slept for half the day and then spent the other half deep cleaning the fridge and declutteri g kitchen drawers. By chance got in touch with an d friend from school days and have arranged to meet for lunch tomorrow. Something to look forward to. We also talked about doing some other stuff so hopefully, when money isn’t such an issues we’ll be able to do some other stuff to fill my time instead of sitting at home bored. I am on my own a lot of the time and this was definitely one of my triggers, being bored and lonely with nothing to do so I need to fill my time. 

I did a little bit of shopping and had a really nice dinner. 

In bed now just reading the site to help me go to sleep. Day 2 over and gf. 

Day 3 - starting to feel a bit better and no urges at the min. Just getting ready to go for lunch, haven’t seen this person in years so hopefully we’ll have a good catch up. Then when I get back I’m going to continue with the house work and decluttering. Need to keep my mind occupied with healthy things. 

Hope everyone else has a good gamble free Sunday.

I hope you had a lovely lunch and catch-up with your friend. Just checking in really to let you know I'm thinking of you. 

G'nite 

xoxoxox 

Aww thanks Drama Llama, your support is appreciated. 

End of day 3 and moving in to day 4, even though I still need to sleep in between. 

Despite having such a major blow out only 3 days ago, I am feeling okay. Today I actually had a good day, having lunch and a catch up with an old friend-I can actually say I genuinely enjoyed it and hopefully will become a more regular occurance. I have plans for tomorrow so that will keep me busy and I strangely feel quite calm about everything as I know the future holds bigger and better things without a life of gambling. I can really say by signing up to gamstop, I feel happier and less worried about a relapse as mine was online and with that in place should make it virtually impossible for me to do so in the future, plus because of it I would even bother wasting my energy to try and find a way round it. I am feeling positive this time that I can lead a gf life, pay off my debt and hopefully start saving. Still a few things financially I need to sort out this month but I know I am get this straight from refraining from gambling. 

Best wishes to all on this journey. 

Night all!

Well it’s now 16 days gf and things are a lot better. Financially I managed to sort out most of the nessessities and will make up the few payments I haven’t at the end of the month. 

I  am feeling a lot calmer two weeks on and the fog is starting to clear. I managed to resolve it without admitting the relapse to family close but it was very close. I know some won’t agree with this but it means the only damage emotionally was done to myself and not my loved ones. 

Things are looking a lot more positive then two weeks ago and I hope they will continue this way staying gamble free. 

I have blocks in place including gamstop so I am feeling hopeful that I can remain gf.