[Closed] Charly's life

Hi

Thank you for your kind messages.

Had a nice evening with my 'boys', phonecalls from my family and a visit from our neighbours.

Have volunteered to do the nightshift for the G.A. helpline tonight, which reminds me, I have to print of the meetings list in a minute.

Still having trouble with the internet provider. looking into changing providers. hopefully the problem will be sorted soon. Am missing the evening chats with you guys.

Am feeling good. No gambling thoughts to report. Am a bit worried about my sister. Her relationship has just gone t**s-up and she's been on the phone pouring her heart out. Will be good to go over in a fortnight to give her a big hug.

Mum and Dad are ok, although I really do have the feeling Dad has given up on life. When I go over in 2 wks, I'm going to go for a walk with him and have a chat. He really must get up and go for walks more often. He just sits around indoors. He says, he feels safer there. He's worried that he'll feel sick or faint when he goes out. But he needs to get some excersise. So we shall see when his little girl gets there.

It'll be a manic weekend in Germany. Have to sort my brother and sister out, too. They haven't spoken to each other for just over a year now and I think that's quite long enough now. Me think we're going to have one of those sibling sessions, where we drink a lot, talk a lot and laugh and cry a lot. Am confident that we'll be able to get back to normal.

Have a good day.

Stay strong, safe and don't gamble.

God Bless

Charly

Hi Charly

with you by your familys side you will get back to normal, you care you love and you are a rock for your family..

Listening to your sister (and now its really listneing) because your mind is with her 100% and not wondering of into gambling thoughts.. Just being there for her will be helping her right now and that hug you give her in two weeks I get this feeling its going to be a bear hug full of love and support..

Taking you Dad for a walk, helping him to see what he has, will give him strength, a little stroll, small steps arm in arm with his daughter will take some of the worry away from him..

You are one of teh good ones in Life Charly, you are golden..

Lots Of Love & Hugs

Lucy

xxx

Hi Charly, thank you for your advice. Ive been thinking about doing the phone duty for a while now as i used to do it years ago before i broke out. I just wanted to make sure im 100% focussed before i commit to it as my life has been a little wobbly lately.

Reading about your family reminds me a lot of mine. I need to build bridges, its holding me back in many ways. My brother i saw last October but hes a gambler and annoys the hell out of me when im with him as he does the old "im off to the bank machine" trick and 3 hrs later returns with lie after lie about where hes been while im sitting there with the kids. I dont need that hassle to be honest.

My parents just sit in their bungalow, dont go far but expect everyone to go ot them. My son hates it there because they let their dog jump all over him and hes terrified so theres history now between them and me for the total disrespect they shown him. Because of it they hardly know him and hes 10 now.

Sorry to ramble on your diary....should do it on mine.

For some strange reason i feel safer on yours than mine, cant explain that.

Love and best wishes xx

Hi Diary

Lucy - Thank you for posting those kind words. They mean a lot.

Keith - Thank you also for your kind words. feel free to off-load on my diary, whatever helps my friend, whatever helps.

Am slowly getting excited about the forthcoming trip to Germany(a week tomorrow).

Had to read my orange G.A. book today. There's a bit about the definition of a mature person and I don't think I was very mature this morning.

I felt myself getting very angry with my partner, because instead of talking to my lad about issues he has with him, he offloads them to me and I'm not sure if I want to get involved this time. We have all been living under 1 roof for the past 3 1/2 years and I think it's time that they talk to each other instead of through me.

What I will do however; I'll call in a family meeting and then we can all discuss it. If I get the ball rolling, then maybe they can get talking. I hate being piggy in the middle. I've done that for almost 20 years with my Ex, always trying to please both sides and forgetting about me and my feelings in the process. I'm not strong enough to go through that again. I need to know that if there is a problem that we can all talk to each other openly. This morning almost felt as if I was going behind my lad's back. I suppose that really pixxed me off.

Just writing this down makes me feel angry all over again. Grrrrrrrr

Not very mature at all, have to work on that.

Tuesday I did my first night for the G.A. helpline from 10pm until 7.45am.

That made me feel good in a way.

I did worry as to how many people would call and at what time. I only worried because I didn't want my boys woken up for something I volunteered for.

I moved the phone line from our bedroom into the back bed-room, turned the volume off on the phone downstairs and slept there. Didn't like sleeping on my own, but I didn't want my partner woken up by the phone ringing, I thought that this was the best solution.

It was a good experience and should they get stuck again, I will help out again. I just don't want to tie myself down with a regular slot, not yet anyhow.

There, now that's off my chest I feel better.

God Bless

Charly

I am not going to get mad. I am not going to go mad. I am not going to get mad.

If I write this down 50 times I might believe that.

I log on to chat room and lose connection while in there,then I can't get back in. My machine tells me I'm already in there and I can't be there twice.'What a laugh'

I sign out, log off, turn everything off, then go back in, and..... the flippin' machine still tells me I'm already chatting away. Hope you are enjoying our chat, lol.

HELP!!!!!!!

How can I re-join the chat room, PLEASE???

It is so frustrating.

I have made arrangements for my provider to change and hopefully that will solve it, in the mean-time I think I have to be a very patient, calm and collected bunny. :))

Well, I will try my best.

You all have a good evening and I'll log on from work tomorrow. At least they only lose the plot once a month or so.

God Bless

Charly

Hi Charly,

Hehe I can sympathise with your computer problem...for the past 2 nights mine has decided to connect even slower than dial up !!!

Phoned the provider who kindly reminded me I have mine via router which they won't recognise. So only current solution is to switch it off, unlpug router and then re-start.

But no additions to the swear box....Life is good, Life is GAMBLE FREE Charly..so instead take a leaf out of Lucy's book and say Fiddly flower petals..working for her as well.

thanks charly for reply always nice to get a few words of encouragement im still going to shock period at moment still thinking about gambling but still gamble free thanks charly stay strong like you said look to the future

Hi charly

Thought I would post this here too.

It is next wednesday....

PAIGNTON: Wed's At 7:30 till 9.00 Palace Avenue Methodist Church, Palace Avenue, Paignton, Devon

Access: Entrance in Tower Road at the back of the church

It is only a small meeting, I started the group up just over a year ago and we average between 3 and 7 people .

It would be great if you could make it.

Jim (last bet 22/04/06)

Hi Charly........im ok thank you, went to my meeting last night to get my top up. Off on Monday for another break, becoming an holidayaholic, worse things in the world i guess.

Hoping you have a great weekend and even greater break in Germany..........no one deserves it more xx

Hey Charly,

Thanks for peeking into the diary. Glad you enjoy the quotes, as I find them as a useful reminder, that I need to stay focused and positive as much as humanly possible. Congrats on your successes!

Take care 🙂

hi charly just a quick post to thank you for your post and support it means alot to me hope you have had a good weekend and thanks again could not have come this far without your support and everyone else on here take care steve

HI Charly

i often have to re read from the orange book about acting in a mture way..

i struglle with this as sometimes I say or do something and thing gosh that was not good.. But lol it was better than before..

So now for me its about being more mature than I was when i was a gambler.. and with gelte steps the maturity will happen.. progress is what to strive for..

Frustrations, anger and deep in thought - Its all good it because we have feelings and are in the real world and sometimes I even smile when I get frustrated as I think its good because I am just being normal and have feelings like the rest of teh world who don`t gamble..

You have looked deep inside Charly and found the real you and from where I am standing then the real you is an insperation to all...

Hope you get your connection sorted as soon as an doesn`t cause you to much jip.. and if it takes a while to sort the "fiddly flower pettals"...

Take Care

Love & Hugs

Lucy

xxx

P.s Charly

A high 5 to you for helping somebody else.. who have you helped?

Well that will be me...

Your diary has been an insperation to me and you have shown me that it is a safe place to tell your story.. I have just started mine and lol think its going to be an epic..

Just wanted to say if you hadn`t had done it I don`t think I would have found a way..

Cheers Hon

Love

Lucy

xxx

Thank you All for your kind words.

It makes me feel on top of the world.

I had a fantastic weekend. We went to Monkey World in Dorset yesterday and it was magical. I could spend weeks there.

The different species are just so comical.

After a kiss through the glass from a baby orang utan and a chat with two capuchins, my Angel decided that he was right about me all along - I am a monkey,lol

Haven't had this much fun in a long while.

I feel at peace with myself at the moment, the boys are talking to each other instead of through me, my girl is doing well. She is going to Disney Paris next month with her boyfriend, we're going to Germany Friday - life is good.

God Bless

Charly

Hi Charly

Havent been around much lately , so pleased you are feeling so good and at peace with yourself , and your wonderfull family are all doing so well

Monkey world , i am so jealous !! been wanting to visit there for so long , i have watched it on the tv ( its often on the dicovery channel if you havent seen it !) and absolutley love watching them , so much fun ! maybe i will try and get there soon with my son

Anyway , glad you are ok , hope you have a great break in germany

All the best

Stephen