DaveUK - New Diary

Hi Dave UK

Thanks for getting back to explain how you came to play the FOBT's again. I think we can all identify with you in that we think it's safe to dip our toes back in the water after a period of abstinence..... In almost all cases it most definitely isn't !

Yes, the problem with regular gambling is ' winnings ' are only really a short term loan from the bookies. I wish I was like those people who bet twice a year on the Derby and Grand National and nothing in between but I'm not.

Luckily I've never been tempted to borrow money to gamble and I never use a credit or debit card in a bookies or on-line as it's traceable on a statement and also I don't really want my bank to know how I spend a lot of my money. So I must have some restraint I suppose.

Having said that this afternoon I credited £200 to my on-line account with the intention of having a few bets on World Cup matches, and, surprise surprise, I now find that I've lost the lot on on-line roulette and slots !!

It sounds as though you and I are fairly 'sensible' gamblers - at least compared to some of the horror stories on here - but I suspect it would be so so easy to get into real trouble trying to chase losses.

I don't mind losses on roulette and can walk away with money still in my pocket but I find when playing that it's almost impossible not to increase the stakes as you play, particularly if you play for a longish period.

I think controlled gambling is pretty much a myth for most people, except for the £5 each-way occasional punters I mentioned earlier, and we must accept this if we're serious about giving it up.

I've never been any good at saving money and I must have spent many thousands gambling over the years but the losses have really escalated since FOBT's and on-line gambling reared their ugly heads.

We know that we never win in the long term - as I demonstrated to myself when I checked my old bank statements - but we still persist in thinking that we will win ' the big one ' and it'll all be alright. How daft is that ?

The funny thing is when I go for a period without gambling I can spend what seems like a fortune on food, drink and entertainment and still seem to have loads of money left in my wallet at the end of each week.

Gambling really is a pretty pointless exercise but it's so very hard to stop.

I wish you and everyone else on here the very best of luck in their efforts to lead a normal life again.

Thanks for really useful thoughts Blackjack.

The only control I can honestly I have is that once I have lost what I have won overall it prompts me to stop but where the lack of control is stopping once I am winning and the ability to stop the play, win, lose cycle. I am going to stop it this time as the feelings generated in me when I am chasing and losing are just horrible and I do not want to risk everything I have worked hard for at the expense of trying to outwit an ultra, ultra, ultra clever machine and equally clever system.

The point you make Blackhack about money lasting so much longer when we don't gamble resonates well with me. I think feeding money into a machine devalues it do much.

The weekend has been an achievement as on 2/3 occassions I have needed to go into town fir genuine reasons on my own and would have hadample opportunity to sneak in to the bookies. I have come no where near doing this.

This takes me to 8 gamble free days and the investment I have made in reading self-development books and publications has been very worthwhile.

My next target is to make it 9 days - I need to do this. I cannot gamble because I cannot stop.

I like your attitude dave, I can really relate to it and have taken in some inspirtation from your posts. Especially aggree with reading up on compuslive gambling.

The main problem for most CG's is noone knows that we are CG in most cases. There's usually noone over your shoulder to go "wow, you wanna stop putting your money in now mate" "your gonna lose the lot"

Sites like this and online publications bring home the reality of CG, and people on here are supportive. This is the only place I can find and talk to people who suffer from the same thing.

Keep it up mate, im on day 5 and its feeling good. I wanna get to year 5!

GOOD WORK! STAY STRONG!

Thanks wronghead - 5 days is really good and if you concentrate on just a day at a time 5 weeks will become 5 months which will become 5 years.

You are so right that its good to be able to come on here and confess what we have done and for me it is important to post on my diary and not just use the site once things have gone wrong.

I have had another gamble free day and am spending time investing in my personal development rather than feeding a machine with £20 notes!! I have done some useful work around associating my brain to all the bad feelings gambling brings - this will help as a deter me I am sure.

I cannot gamble because I cannot ever stop.

Well done Dave on reaching 9 days from someone on 72 days. Just make sure that we always have a 63 day gap between us, eh?!

Those FOBTs really are evil. They have been installed a a group of greedy people who obviously put in hours of research and are 'clever' enough to take money off us.

BUT the more people like us stay away from them, the less money they will have. Hey, even with a small group like the ones in your diary, they are already thousands and thousands of pounds down!

Now that makes me feel good!

I have no qualms about bookies being a place for people who would like to go in and have the odd flutter like £1 to £5 on a horse at the Grand National but it's when they started installing those 'reverse ATMs' where you can bet £100 a spin that the charm of bookies died. How on earth can ordinary people like you and me afford to bet £100 a spin?! Now that's what I call incredibly stupid!

Sorry but I just wanted to share my tuppence worth!

Remember not to dwell on the past too much but it might be useful to think about one truly dreadful occasion when you were really down after losing a huge amount of money that you did not have. I have one and that is the only thing that I remember about my past = the future is far more important to me now.

Onwards and upwards to reaching double figures tomorrow and keep up the good work!

Day 13 completed - and I can honestly say I have not thought about the FOBTs.

In some ways I am lucky as the roulette machine was my only form of gambling and has only ever been. I was not the slightest bit interested in betting on football, dogs, horses, the lottery or scratch cards or anything else.

To be precise I was a FOBT addict not a gambling addict and before anyone says I know its a form of gambling but this to me says the attraction was the machine not the gambling.

There are moments in life that we can look back on as defining and for me it was when I was finally able to articulate what it was about the FOBT that caused the problem and it is summed up in the phrase 'I cannot play them because I cannot stop'.

As we know if you win you can't stop and while you are chasing you can't stop and the outcome is ALWAYS the same - a big loss and that sickly feeling. Sometime its a while before that big loss but it always happens!

Thank you to whoever first posted that phrase - thank you very much.

I must admit I am also geting a kick out of the fact that everyday I do not play means less profit overall for the bookie - very satisfying!!

Stay satisfied Dave , they have enough Hun.

Hope you enjoy the footie, i know i shall.

TC

STAY STRONG

Kim xx

Thanks Kim - I will enjoy the footy and also enjoy getting back on track.

14 days complete and loving being back here with some old friends to.

Have a lovely weekend.

Dave x x

Well done, Dave, 14 days is great - 2 whole weeks! Loved your post about betting small on the FOBTs before getting sucked in - I can certainly relate this with my experiences with those awful machines.

They were created by a group of people who obviously put in a lot of research into how they can make a machine which can act solely as a reverse ATM. Hopefully more of us will come to our senses and these people will lose a lot of money by us not feeding these machines.

Sorry to rant on, but I thought I'd put in my tuppence worth!

Keep up the great work, Dave and enjoy the football. 1-1 isn't a bad result, after all, starting a tournament slowly is not necessarily a bad thing.

Cheers W58 - yes 1-1 was OK and to be honest no-one has looked any good yet - Argentina are OK going forward but poor in defence. No doubt Brazil will end up looking good (they always do).

As for the FOBT's they must employ some real clever people who know how the brain works and can therefore maximise the profits - well they can employ Einstein as far as I am concerned as there is no going back as (and apologies for banging on about this 'I cannot play the FOBT's because I cannot stop'.

The big loss is seeming like ages away and so now the real work starts as the pain of the loss has lessened.

Day 16 - but 1 day at a time.

never apologise for the i cannot win cause i cannot stop phrase dave mate...them few words have given many people on here immediate hope,myself included...well done on your continued recovery...as you say one day at a time soon them days will add into months my friend...best wishes we can do this 😉

17 Days Complete.

I cannot play FOBT's as I cannot stop and it always ends the same way - ALWAYS.

I will not gamble tomorrow.

Best wishes to all.

I have not played the FOBT - the reason being that once I start I cannot stop.

Its nice to hit the 3 week stage but what is important is the future so I am going to do a day at a time.

It has also occured to me just how much of my life was being impacted when I started playing the FOBT's again. The obvious consequence is the financial side of things but I also now look at the lost time, the lies and the inability to concentrate on things for the want of getting the next fix.

Life feels so much better without the FOBT's.

Another FOBT free day - had entire afternoon to myself and going to play never entered my head.

Thats 22 days and £22 in my savings jar !

I will not gamble tomorrow.

Another successful day and to be honest the FOBT's are starting to become a distant memory and just something that other people may choose to play.

Some people choose to smoke, I don't - some people choose to take drugs, I don't - some people choose to play FOBT roulette - I don't. There are equally things I choose to do that others don't.

A friend asked me last week if I had won lately and I looked him in the eye and said

' I don't play them anymore because once I start I can't stop so its just not worth it'.

He smiled and agreed!!

Another positive is that as its getting on for a month since I last played FOBT roulette the pain of tbe last loss has pretty much gone but I still have no intention of playing.

I will say it again - the big change for me when I read on here the saying 'I cannot gamble as I cannot stop'.

I will not play the FOBT tomorrrow!!