07/08/18.
Woke up this morning feeling a bit down, feeling a bit guilty but still wanted to go to work as I knew this would keep my mind off things. Work was good and the day went quick as I work with some decent people. Work certainly took my mind off things as my feelings of guilt soon disappeared.
Once I was back home, all blocks were in place to prevent myself from gambling. K9 software was installed, all apps excluded from and my brother paid a yearly subscrption to gamban for me. It feels really good knowing that my family are behind me and are supporting me through this, they have given me the tools to succeed but only I can bring success to myself and I am determined not to let myself down but more importantly not to let my family down. My biggest inspiration is my two year old nephew, as he adores me. He inspires me to inspire myself to better myself. I keep saying to myself, 'who do you want your nephew to know you as? A gambler that can't afford to buy him or gifts and take him out for days, or his uncle who he adores and who managed to turn his life around?'
This evening I also took the decision to hand my debit card to my mum and allow her to control my finances, it felt strange to do this at this stage in my life and at times it may feel like I'm being babysat but I know it's for the best.
Take care.
Ry.
Hello Ry,
Well done on all the constructive efforts you are making to progress your recovery.
It will be easier for other forum members to keep track of your progress if you update your original diary thread rather than create a new thread every time you post. You can find your threads on your profile page. If you like, you could copy and paste your posts titled 'Day two', 'Day three', 'Day four' as replies to your original diary thread, so they are all in the same place.
Take care,
Forum admin.
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