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Hi Ade,

Just congratulating you on your positivity, that definitely is the way forwards because the addiction hates it.

Stay extra strong and focused as pay day arrives, you can be caught unawares, never never underestimate the power of the addiction,

Well done on your days

Suzanne xx

well done ade not far off a month free any day free is great "when your in your right mind" thanks for all your support much appreciated lets keep it going and get to that never nearer finish line

Thanks Suzanne, Michael and NT for your supportive posts.

Day 24 for me today. Just back from the Christmas company do.

In total control of my own destiny. Haven't felt this good for years.

Keep strong all

Ade

Hi Ade,

I love that totally in control of your own destiny. Well done, I hope I get there some day.

Well done on your postitivity

Suzanne xx

Thanks for the post Suzanne.

This is my 25th day without any need or desire to waste any money on the outcome of random sports events. I have clarity of thought like never before. My family comes first. My daughters are up and about having their breakfast making some more Christmas decorations and looking forward to a nice family day around the house. My other half has gone out shopping and I am planning a productive day of small diy tasks that have been put off for far too long, and tidying the leaves (again!) in the back garden.

It was pay day yesterday for me and I have no need or urge to draw any money out. In the past a Saturday morning plus money just paid in the bank would have equalled only one thing. But that, like I said, was in the past.

I am now in the present, and looking forward to making my future a much better life than the one I was stumbling through previously.

Keep strong all and have a great weekend

Ade

Hi Ade

Many thanks for my Saturday support again,maybe next week I won't need it.

Your doing well in your recovery, and iI hope to follow in your footsteps

Thanks again Dino

Thanks Dino and NT.

Day 26 for me. All is good after enjoying a full family orientated weekend.

Keep strong all

Ade

27th day without gambling, or the slightest urge to gamble. My days are so much better without the repetative drain of gambling, and more often that not losing. Returning to this site, and starting my recovery diary up again has been the best decision I have made in a very long time. I had put it off again and again when the thought of posting again came in to my head throughout the Summer and Autumn. I always found a reason not to stop. Mainly it was gambling on football and horses. The habit of doing these sad bizarre rituals had become so engrained in me, that it had become the norm. I was just on the revolving roundabout of gambling, not wanting to get off. I was not ready to. I was losing a lot of money, but logic played absolutely no part in my thinking. My self-worth was low and I needed help, but I was never going to admit that to myself. I liked the feeling of a wedge of money in my pocket and taking my chances on football coupons or random horse races. Virtual horse racing became a big favourite of mine too. It actually makes me laugh now, when I think that a month ago I was gambling away my hard earned money on f*****G cartoon racing, sometimes before 9am on a Saturday morning whilst I kicked my heels waiting for my daughter to finish her gymnastics training.

I would gamble like this for weeks. The Saturday morning virtuals whilst I filled out my countless football coupons. Then back again to the bookies about Noon to place more football bets whilst picking up a newspaper and some rolls for lunch (had to have an excuse to pop out). Then maybe another visit just before 3pm Kick-off to do another footy bet and do some horses too.

After the inevitable losses, I would normally find another excuse to go out (normally to get a take-away, or go to Homebase for some obscure diy part), then bet on foreign football coupons, and dogs, more virtual S***e and American Horse racing. It defies believe really that I have done this for so long and not realised that I was destroying myself slowly bit by bit. My head was f*cked. My social skills were deteriating to nearly non-existent, whilst I walked the path of this gormless automaton. Obviously Sunday would follow a similar pattern with the inevitable chasing of ones losses from the multiple losing bets from the day before. Monday would be the lunchtime dash to do dogs and virtuals plus more obscure football coupons. Tuesday and Wednesday more footy, normally Champions League, etc.......you get the picture. Occassionally a fluke would be landed. Say a 50/1 or 100/1 virtual each-way win, or an obscure South-African horse that had my Grandads middle name in the title. But I would say these were rare......very rare. Enough to keep me involved mind, but very rare indeed. I guess I'd also have a football bet come up once in a while. But this was very rare when I think about some of the ludicrous accumulators i'd do. All in all I was S***e at gambling..Correction. I was f*****G S***e at it.

Not sure where all that came from, as I was intending to write a short post. Anyway, I feel better for writing down what a sad, selfish, stupid P***k I was.......

Now, I feel calmer, focused and at total ease with myself. Organised, driven, regretful, but at the same time totally determined to make this change permanent.

Thanks for listening

Stay strong

Ade

Hi Ade,

Thanks for sharing, what we are all too familiar with, I guess we will never know the real real answers as to why/what/ what if/ but that doesn't matter now, it's today that matters and you are doing great.

Take care of today, that's what matters

Suzanne xx

Thanks for the post Suzanne.

Bit of a reflective rant yesterday. Not sure where that came from really, but nice to get it off my chest. 28 days since my last bet and my strength and determination is still strong.

Have to look forwards and focus on the positive things in life from now on.

Keep strong all

Ade

A very merry christmas Ade

Thanks for all the support from a 21 day gamble free Dino

Thanks Dino.

29 days for me. Happy Christmas all.

Ade

Hi Ade,

Happy Xmas, have a good one.

Suzanne xx

Thank you so much Suzanne for posting, and following my recovery.

I have reached the 30 day mark in my recovery. I am barely 15 minutes into Christmas day and I feel elated with the change in me over the last 30 days. I am just savouring the 2nd of my 2 cold beers that I am treating myself to as I post. My golf balls are all asleep. Tucked up, awaiting a special day when they awake......

I am too, and I will savour every last second of a gamble-free Christmas.

Keep strong all

Ade

Ade

fella my best wishes to you and yours this christmas

keep shovelling that sand!!

abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back