Dormant

Afternoon V

Keep hanging in there you know it's worth it. Just thought I'd mention a new Saturday chat starts today between 2-3, if the Saturday sport is getting to you might be worth popping in. Not sure if I will make it but you don't need me to hold your hand.

Have a good weekend just avoid the 1st bet the rest will fall into place

KTF

Martin the top geezer. Thankyou

Your more than welcome to hold my hand but be careful mind as it has a tendency to fall off ☺

My barriers today is work again. A posh part of Surrey in the sticks and no bookies for miles...

Just a quick Vrrrrommm

How is week going?

Missing your updates ☺

Remember Sandra, what makes you comfortable, never let's you grow.

I read that and liked it, so very true and akin to that life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

I took an early one from work today. I'm at the business end of a hard contract, tempers starting to fray and rows a plenty. I've felt the volcano bubbling and now sat having a cold one as I slowly rewind. Hence this post ......... s***t, the illusion of the comforting bookies are appealing as I have a little jaunt a way from the safety of the sticks.

I'm trying and achieving isolation from cyber world and steering clear from here. This place can replace the comfort blanket, albeit healthier but none the less a replacement.... Disclaimer, only my humble.

I think it was Glint who said in one of his many fantastic posts that an element of ego isn't a bad thing. So here's a little from me, im a fortunate chap, a gentle strong soul who got caught up in many addictions. For so long of my life I wanted to replicate one of my hero's ( my dad )who was a womanising, hard drinking, gambling charismatic strong character. I failed on a few of them and became a gambling, drinking, drug taking character. I'm now at the conclusion as I look in the mirror that I didn't need to replicate anyone, just be me..... And, im happy with finding me...

A ramble as I avoid a gamble

Hi Paul

Like and relate to the 'dad issue' you describe.

My father also a strong, large character. I also struggled trying to emulate, whilst not really having same dna

Or rather - what makes my dad unique and a large character is that he wasn't trying to emulate someone - he forged his own path.

In fact I can now increasingly see the same emotional vulnerability in him, becoming more apparent whether in his or my old age.

It's all about personal responsibility for me just now. Partly because I was pretty openly (in my mind) 'blaming' my father, bemoaning my inadequacies.

Cheers

Louis

Hey Mr V!

Robin Hood here lol. Decided to take different route tonight (no eyes rolling or finger pointing but some people DO work till 5am on a Friday night :-/ ) & guess what - A1 does take you to some woods lol, might need to investigate in daylight tho 😉

Thank you for your post! Remember honourable Shiny telling me " You are enough" so may i repeat the same to you - YOU are enough Paul ☺..don't try & be someone you're not...it never works!

Dear Freda's acceptance comes in the picture here...listen to wise ones & act 😉 (note to myself to do the same)

As of greatest palls i met on here...have you heard from Dotty as my shout outs not getting answered :-(...worried..

Anyhoo, you look after yourself and keep on keeping on! Jeal of cold one ya had yesterday but i wouldn't b an addict if i didn't...slap my wrists! Since i don't want to get drunk i better stay away from that 1st one ☺

Later you and thank you for your kind words again!

It's all about personal ' responsibility for me just now. Partly because I was pretty openly (in my mind) 'blaming' my father, bemoaning my inadequacies.'
Ditto on that Louis - Same, Same but different!

And like anything in life especially including addictions, the not taking responsibilty is the spiders Web. Good on you Louis, your doing the walk in sync with the talk ☺

Just as you finish Sandra, I start!! And I'll say this untill im blue in the face, us humans are not designed to work! Dotty ' s still learning to email but I believe her mah is ok and im sure radio silence is temporary.

In b&b, just about to head to work. A collegue is stressing me and I thought ' f***k it ' amd walked yesterday. Being a control freak, never wrong, a closed mind, overly sensitive, a manipulator and passive aggressive despite being a hulk of a man! Am I seeing a reflection of myself to a larger extent! I think addiction in one form or other is all around us. And ' discovery ' acts as a cocoon to save one being dragged back into the S****e.....

Probably made no sense what so ever. Lots on my mind, tired and a little wound. . . .

I won't gamble, but........ I know, my mood makes it dodgy ground

That makes complete sense to me Paul, especially the bit about not being designed for work 🙂

I know you're not a 12 stepper but I have found that reciting the serenity prayer when my mood is starting to flare sometimes helps me even myself out.

For what it's worth, we like you so I hope you can figure out how to do the same & I also hope your mood settles & you have a calmer day.

I get what your saying there Odaat with regards to the serenity prayer. Could do with something similar in dealing with this work S****e I'm dealing with at the moment.

Have been full of angst since Friday and heading to work with a stomach full of flutter flies. It's a bit.ch, I'm liking this hard job im on but witnessing a full blown addict head games being played out in front of me. It makes me appreciate more and more what im capable off and what f & f have to go through. But my dilemma is, I can't talk to someone who's always right and it's my work, so I can't walk a way !

Maybe looking for a positive is, in ' discovery ' , your able to see the reflection of a clouded mind addict. But, I'm worn out by a person not a job!!!

Long winded point but barriers are also needed to the addict mind which in various degrees is all around us. We're a world who worships addicts and also look down our noses at them. Irony hai.....

Eat, sleep, drink healthy will need to be my barriers this week as I wait for flutter flies to fly off

Sugar Ray Leonard you say: Olympic gold medalist, five-weight world champion, widely regarded as one of the greatest of all-time in his profession.

An obvious comparison, often made.

Thank you for your post volcano, it's prompted me to post and given me a positive start to the day to build on.

Idle exhaustion remains. I'm amazing myself at how little I'm cramming into my days.

I am sort of working on it, without really knowing where to turn, which repeatedly leaves me lost in a reverie where practicality quickly turns to fantasy.

If you're towards the end of the contract at work and you won't be working with this annoying character again, I would be asking myself: 'is any of this going to matter in say a months time?'

If it won't matter then, try not to let things get to you now.

Always best to reflect before you retaliate.

That's important.

If you could go back, would you have done things differently last week?

If you take a moment to think at the time; you'll be much more likely to act then, accordingly with how you would rather have acted upon reflection.

Expect all the angst and flutter flies you had on Monday were for nothing and this week hasn't been as bad as you had built it up in your mind.

That's usually the case with these things.

Have you had time for any ACT therapy yet volcano?

It'll be very interesting how you get on.

Read your post over in the 'Debates and discussions' which I thought made a very good point from a different angle that only you could look at it from.

Always tough reading about your arm.

I have the utmost respect for how you responded to such adversity volcano.

Thank you for sharing.

Definitely an example of where you need to give yourself a ton of credit.

That was a defining moment in your life.

A moment no one would know how they would respond to, unless they found themselves in that very same difficult situation; a defining moment where you are forced to learn a lot about yourself.

Acceptance and determination.

That is what you are made of volcano.

Remember that.

Sugar Ray Glint. This is maybe one of the many reasons why I relate to you. To quote the rightful greatest -

The man who has no imagination has no wings...... and will stay grounded!

And as i'm on a roll -

He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life !

RIP Ali

Albeit, with the latter, us CG'S seem to take the wrong risks on donkeys or fixed machines and the risk should be at the end of one's comfort zone..

Your bang on with the annoying character and the flutter flies have flown and im pretty good. Thanks..

ACT never took off. I've put work first and doing every Saturday as I work toward a aim. .... TBC on ACT..

My arm is a big part of me, part of my humour and in a odd way, possibly a good thing to happen to me. It helped me look at the world differently and emphasise with others more and appreciate my fortunes. Before, I took things for granted and needed grounding.

I think adversity is a gift of sorts. It acts like an LSD trip and im always facinated when I meet people whom ate slightly of the wall or who have an abundance of humility and the reasons behind why they are who they are..

Would Stephen Hawkins change a thing if he had a choice ??

I wish you well Glint and keep working on the Idle exhaustion. It's somewhere in your DNA that makes you take the punches and to get back up.......

' No Mas ' Not in your vocabulary

I'm 50 today as I sup my lime soda and then it dawns on me that im also 50 days Gf today 50/50, I love signs!

Belated 50/50 ☺

Enjoy your lime soda 😉

Very true about adversity volcano.

Adversity can be the making of some; success the undoing of others.

All about how we deal with the good and the bad.

Anyway...

Happy 50th Birthday volcano!!!

Well done on the 50 days (and years).

Pisces, eh?

That's a cool sign.

Enjoy what's left of today, wishing you many happy and healthy years ahead

Glint

Happy Hawaii day on both counts my fellow salt of the earth.

Keep striving