Every Day Is A Second Chance

Hai LB,

You must know by now that us addicts have a tendency to lie..... ie my forum activity.

Besides its been good company on this train ride. I'm taking a weekend off from my recovery but without gambling.

We all need a break from digging every now and then, so a weekend of relatively comic news papers, a few beers with friends later and a good dollop of dribble to boot.

Enjoy your weekend....

Hey you,

Well, believe me or not i never knew such "gem" exists!! :-0...not until i met Juuune lol..if i remember correctly (not too good memory :-(..age that is ;-/) i brought one each for us on our first meeting since she waffled on about how good choice that is for ages! Well, ya know what - i happened to leave mine in the car..do'h (she soon destroyed hers tho lol) & in a heat!!! lol..and i eneded up with a pack of mushy stuff! But all worked out well cause as soon as i put it in a fridge it got its shape back (nearly)☺..who cares what shape - tastes the same huh.

Anyway, don't wonna keep stamping on those taste buds of yours and you must crave one badly by now :-(...try an apple/orange onstead ;-)..just a thought!

Me is back to work, so you all be good and behave!

One day at a time - keep winning
:-)))

S x

Ps. Got bargain on a way to work - 8 galaxy ripple bars for £2 quid! Would love to share .....but...ohhhh..those diets huh 😉

Hugs girl - you're doing it!!

:-(.
Only had one i swear! Other 7 was shared with awesome staff in this place! I decide to join you on the diet as of tom ☺...even tho, that's the only time i seem to eat sugary stuff (@ work so i can zuuuuummmm around like crazy & stay awake) 😉

Goodnight you & keep safe!

Hi LB,

Interesting last post. I have done counselling training in the past and your thoughts brought it all back. For me its so easy to fall into the "Im not ok" and "Your Ok" category. Born of low self-esteem of course. Fundamentally thats what stops me moving forward i think. I don't feel worthy even though I am very capable.

Well done on your gambling free time and generally being pro-active in life.

Warm regards... S.A 🙂

Feeling good today. Started the morning with a very stroppy teenager refusing to go to school, but even that has failed to dent my mood. A nice peaceful weekend and I'm (so far) sticking to my healthy eating plan. No processed food, no sugar, no alcohol...felt very virtuous at the checkout this morning. No more hiding a multi pack of ripples under the bag of salad for me! I need to stick with it because the bisuits, crisps, wine and chocolate that I turned to fill the slots gap has left me unable to do up my jeans and there's a very real possibility that I could get stuck in a doorway.

Mr. G has been quiet of late. Haven't heard him whispering in my ear over the last few days. I think he might have finally got the message to P**s off. Plenty of times when I know that I have been gambling and I haven't even thought about it. Some unexpected money was in my account, which I transferred quickly back to our joint account. I like to think I wouldn't have used it, but there's no point in taking that risk.

I've joined up some more dots, and filled in a bit more of the jigsaw. I'm really feeling that this is recovery proper now.

OAU. LB x

Hi LB , Thanks for dropping by and may I add how well put that post was !

As I did pass my test first time , be it many moons ago when things were much more lenient and lessons didn't cost a small mortgage, maybe your right , that " I do get it " and that it is all about acceptance ?.

I don't have those I need to go out and gamble again momements because I know it's just not an option for me anymore, so there really is no point in me beating myself up and struggling to come to terms with something that just can't be a part of my life anymore !.

I think it's just in my nature to ask why I get it and others don't ? . I'm really happy now where I am and to be honest maybe I shouldn't ask as many questions of myself but I'm one of those people who need's something to worry about , even if there is nothing to worry about , if that makes sense ?.

This site has opened up seemingly endless questions for me , we're all so different , so complex but we all have the same aim'sbut yet so different in our approaches to recovery .

I do see a pattern to the long termer's abstinance though and the whole total acceptance thing is paramount I believe to staying in recovery .

What I see on here is almost like the Monty python Leper scene from Life of Brian , when the Leper is cured he notices that he can no longer beg for a living and ask's " Could you just make me a bit lame on Wednesday's as its a good earner " , some want to be cured and other's still want to dabble ?.

Glad to hear that Mr G has been leaving you alone of late , def don't need him in our lives and that your drawing some conclusions of your own regarding your recovery.

Youre diet sounds a bit like mine though , almost low carbing ?, I'm type 2 diabetic no med's just diet controlled thankfully and a low carb diet is the only one that keeps my weight low , have the odd carb crazy day but only as a treat !.

Take care of yourself and catch up with you soon xx

Hey mrs Liberty,

Sticking to the healthy eating plan..that's awesome! No chocs my way either...but was naughty on alcohol 🙁 ...i guess i need to wait till I'm committed :-0...& that's a tough s***.

Not much words today, but since we had a "hug poor Sandra" day yesterday i shall return that ine your way...you need it or not - it just might help you to make the right step forward for the day ahead...hay ho...my hopes anyway ☺

((((((((LB)))))))) - healthy eating champion 😉

S x

Yo LB,

A cleansing of the mind and body eventually filters down and makes the soul wholesome again with a smile to boot.

Eagerly interested in your progress.

My ' dollop of dribble ' was merely suggesting I untended of having a weekend of small talk. Some thing you might recognise in my diary.

Have a good day on the celery as I sup my coffee and chomp at my choccy bar

Hi LB

Thanks for your supportive, kind comments. I was very touched when you and other people I have a lot of time for, posted nice things on my diary.

You seem to be doing really well - very calm, reflective and committed. It's hard to believe it was only as long ago as last August that you were in the thick of it - you've come far.

Best

Louis

Just a hi ☺

Hope all is good with yourself and wish you a great weekend 🙂
(Alongside healthy eating plan 😉 )

Take care Mrs Liberty

Hello again ☺

Thank you so much for your thoughts and please never think i will go of on one cause of these kind suggestions, because i won't. Yes i have deeper issues and CBT wasn't enough., happy pills wasn't enough and i struggled to make a "change" in present life.i did go through the process (very uncomfortable long & agonising phone call) of getting "accepted" or as professionals said..."preferable method to help with my PTSD" - EMDR...however i pulled out the last minute because couldn't handle it..Simple..just too much.

I know i need to address my issues & i will keep looking for the help out there. I was scared yesterday but only cause of my reaction re sad family news..everything else doesn't seem so important anymore.

I shall get bk on track with the family first and will start addressing my own lil head ☺

All will be ok! Once again i thank you for your thoughts and deffo know you're trying to help..
Tipu tapu...

S x

Hey mrs Liberty,

Of course we're friends! I am not a baby to be wrapped in the wool and be told what i want to hear. Some home truths hit home from many of you recently and i truly appreciate your honesty. Sometimes it's not easy to look at yourself, but the picture others arounds you sees is worth taking in consideration.

I'm absolutely aware of my shortcomings and i know that new tactic is needed...sometimes little things can create brand new picture of our lives, i had few of them where i thought "that's it, i can move on", but unfortunately they don't last for long and i get bk to my old self...and my old self is trapped in the dark place and as you have already seen, it keeps eating me up.

Today i feel ok...tommorow is another day & bk to work and i am preparing mentally for the challenges there. Self note " - take yourself to job centre silly!".

Thank you once again girl and hope your recovery is ticking along nicely. Without a change we will keep having the same behaviour huh...so it's important to put final dots on "i" and move on.

Have a good day and keep smiling

S x

Hello LB

Thank you for that post and it connected with me. I know I have to keep striving to do something different, the familiar has kept me trapped for too long.

Rob

Yo LB,

The pain you know is familiar and, by causing it yourself, you at least feel in control. You know how things will turn out since, without realising it, you have engineered it that way.

Will 2nd Rob there. Slowly letting it filter.

How are you getting on Mrs Liberty?
Hope you're still sticking to veg and whatever else healthy out there! Tell ya what, i had an apple today lol...progress i suppose ;-)...alongside all the horrible stuff but hey...let's look at positives ☺

One day at a time huh...keep moving forwards, rewards are endless girl...keep claiming ur life bk

S x