Get busy living... Or get busy dying..

Thanks Blondie - it wasn't my fault I find is one of my hardest mantras to instill in my brain so helps to hear it from others with similar experiences.

xxx

thank you for the posts everyone.

Today I let the tears flow rather than stuff them today I just feel loss and my heart hurts with it..

I miss my dad.

Happy farthers day to the brightest star in the sky.... Second star to the right and straight on till morning.....

My peter pan the boy who never grew up.. I love you dad.

xxxxxx

My thoughts are with you Blondie on this day. I would have posted earlier but the 'bizzies' have only just given me back my phone and computer after last Fridays classroom fiasco.

Take care

Steve

Yo,

Just sending you hug , sweet pea .

Shiny xxxxxxxxxx

Hi Blondie,

Last two posts some heavy stuff and yet you manage with grace and style. You my dear are a star too. Shine on lovely lady B. -joanxxx

No gambling but even though I rarely have urges I know that recovery is a lifetime commitment and If i continue what i am doing as in addressing my faults, remaining honest with myself and the people i love and never forgetting the damage gambling did to me and my life im sure i wont go far wrong.. But i also know never to say never....

No complacency here !!

Today I have thrown down the gauntlet so to speak in work, and made a suggestion about changes to the re-organisation which would catapult me right out of my comfort zone and into another area of the business i have been dying to get my hands on for years. lol

all though i am busy in my current role, I am coasting and im not challenged , my team are stable, they are high performing and I just keep managing that but in all honesty im bored.

I need a new challenge, so i threw my hat in the ring and will see how it goes tomorrow.

Would i have done this whilst gambling, Not on your life, am i capable of it... you bet your boots I am..

Time to bring in the big guns and get the old grey matter going again....

Fingers crossed

Blondie xxx

Blondie

well done you!!!!

Nothing like a challenge to motivate you.

I hope the running training is going well i would be interested in making a text donation to your wonderful cause, maybe you could post the details.

Gamcare i am sure would allow it, those lovely people.

I hope woody is in good form, our two are having a field day as its baby rabbit season!!!

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hey Blondie,

we spoke on the chat last week and very much enjoyed chatting with, congrats on your progress, you have so much that you can be proud of, keep up the great work and have a good day!!

Phil

Hiya Ms B ..

Sounds like you're firing on all cylinders at work and up for a new challenge ....well ..why not? ...there is nothing stopping you moving forward in all areas of your life now....

Phew...remember to sleep though...lol lol lol

Am still reading and also reading the book ...it's going in ..and one of these days I may start acting on the wise words...lol...self compassion not being my strong point.

cloudy but soon to get warmer today ...R and D xx

Good Morning,

You never cease to amaze me my friend. Do you ever stop? Always pushing forward, always striving to do more and improve your life. Your attitude and hunger for recovery and life is just second to none and anyone reading your diary would be truly inspired. Today I am inspired by you even if I do a little tired trying to keep up 🙂

Oh I was going to write a big long post last week about the probs with the fiance and then thought better of it. Simply I will say sort him out lol. I desperately struggle with jealousy and male insecurity so I am on your side with that one. I wonder if that's because I'm beautiful 🙂 just a thought!!!!

Flagg x

Yo,

Thank you for your post yesterday . I read and reread the words of Churchill . My mum was his biggest fan , and she probably rested that speech to me time and time again.

Sure I will be back to my old self in the passage of time . But for now feel a bit of a fraud even contemplating commenting on anyone's thread . It will pass I am sure .

Take care Hun , I know it probs took you time to find that passage all I can say is it really did help. You my honey are a diamond !

Shiny xxxxxxx

Hey Ms B

Phew- your energy is so inspiring!

Glad to see you focussed on the future

Irene

x

TFIF....

Another end to the working week and im off down south to my soon to be brother in laws 50th birthday party.

Mum started her treatment on Wednesday this week and so far so good but they say the side affects normally kick in after a week or so....

Had some difficult conversations this week both in work and in my personall life but conversations that i needed to have.... My confidence grows day by day and I am finding that asking for what i want is not as difficult as i used to find it, maybe i think im worthy of happiness and i no longer willing to make huge sacrifices at the expense of my happiness and well being.

Those kind of conversations i would avoided like the plague when i was gambling ...

I like typing things like that it shows me im making steady and sometimes pain stakingly slow progress.... But never the less its progress.

thank you for the posts everyone.

Blondie xxx

Hi Blondie,

Well done for having those conversations I know the feeling of having avoided them in the past. You are doing magnificently!

Dealing with everything that has gone on you can walk tall and just that little bit safer. Your armour grows thicker and yet at the same time more flexible as it is taking you to places you haven't been to before

Stay safe and strong

Paulds

Blondie.

Thanks for the text information, i have passed it on to my nearest and dearest.

Could not think of a better way to spend a few quid, knowing the devastating affect it has on families.

Like gambling addiction.

By having those conversations i feel we cut a bit more of it out, stop the growth of formulating, yes it will be there for life, laying dormant waiting to feed on us at any opportunity.

Hope you have a great weekend.

Keep making the right choice for you.

Abstain and maintain.

Duncs stepping forward never back.