Two weeks and one day not been on line. I think I was 7 yrs old and lost 10 old pence on the pier and was told i cried and got some more old pennies. I have 21 yrs of soberity and did a lot of AA early years. Something is stopping me jumping into /seeking GA or proactive proper help and i dont know what that is. I went nearly a year on my own but got no help. 99.9% of my gambling is on line slots and poker. split 75% to 25%. I would gamble to 5am and get up for work at 6.30am. I like reading old stories on here
Stewpots I think you are where I am tonight. Low. I don't want to wake up tomorrow - hope you are ok.
I'm good thanks . Im 51 and spent a life time gambling. I spent my last 10p on a slot machine when i was 17yrs old and had to walk 4 miles home as did not have the bus fare !. There wont be a quick solutions. Im way past the bankruptcy of years past or spending 10k on a credit card when in Las Vegas i did that many times. I have no credit cards etc I feel 'numb' at present. i wont beat myself up for not doing everything the right way.
Yes I know that feeling. I had it yesterday. But I lost again tonight and broke down a bit. I have lost myself the last few days and lost hope a bit. Sometimes relapse is worse. I should know better. But I don't.
A weekend has past no gambling. Need to get that help
reading a lot of diaries and previous 'chats'. Interested in the different opinions over can you gamble X if Y your problem. Its a funny illness. I think i have self excluded from around 25 sites but there temporary measures.
One whole page of my bank statement no gambling debit. Day 19. Missed the chat , must get the timing right
Another session at 9 tonight stewpots 🙂 don't have to wait long
I think set a target a GA meeting within the next 10 days.
Why wait up to ten days?
Nice to talk to you tonight Stew, GA can be a very good tool I think, although unfortunately I've never been able to find one due to rotating shifts not exactly making life dependable. Anyway, keep up the good work, and keep fighting this horrible addiction.
Ryan
Cynical wife wrote:
Why wait up to ten days?
No reason. It's a goal.
Just spent 2 hrs looking at on line poker on you tube. This has to be a honest diary. Haven't gambled but why do that.
Another weekend , bad cough gamblling free
stewpots38 wrote:
I think set a target a GA meeting within the next 10 days.
Thinking of you
Recovery's not easy as you know from AA. from another addict in recovery. Tri
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