Give peace a chance

Thankyou for the posts on my diary, much appreciated.

Sharon ...Enjoyed the Belinda Carlisle song you mentioned on 'Sars' diary, there was some great music in the 80's & 90's.

Changemylife ...Sure you will enjoy the visit to 'Fruit', it was a pioneer in the regeneration of the old fruit markets. The whole area is awesome with the riverside/pier/marina - 'The Deep' where the fish live - The museums and of course the art gallery presently has the works of the four finalists in the 'Tate Exhibition'. Some people believe God was born in Hull but i'm not sure that's true.

Mixer ... Couple of quotes from your recent posts "If your going through hell, keep going" & "Being gamble free is light, gambling is the real darkness". So very true, we are blind to nigh on everything when caught up in the gambling and everything looks bleak, to get out of it we must remain focussed on our goal and keep going forward.

Moorey ... Early days my friend but you seem to be very positive and focussed on a gamble free christmas. At the start of every month I pay off some of my debt and will do so for another 5 years, how crazy is it that I put myself in such a foolish position! Whatever we do with our lifes has got to better than that gambling madness. Just got to watch out for 'The Sirens' trying to ground us on the rocks. We can live our life to the full and enjoy whatever comes our way.

My song choice today (courtesy of Sharon) is ...Live Your Life Be Free by Belinda Carlisle ...Live your life be free, live your life be free - And when you free your mind - You will leave your past behind.

Morning Diary. I have been reflecting on relationships and compulsive gamblers. When we're gambling all our families and friends play second fiddle to the addiction. We enjoy playing games and ignore the emotional havoc we inflict on ourselves and our loved ones. When we lose the month's wages everyone has to suffer regardless.

My song choice today is ...Wicked Game by Chris Isaak ... The world was on fire and no one could save me but you - It's strange what desire will make foolish people do - I'd never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you - And I'd never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you.

Hi Stephen

I for one know the impact on relationships when we gamble. We lose ourselves to the bet, there in body but not really in mind. If we could take a moment to exit our bodies and hover above I bet we would be appalled to see who we are. We are almost zombie like and do not appreciate what is around us, checking our phones for the scores almost acting as though we are listening to what is going on but really instead consumed with the hope, dismay or concelaing the joy of a big win or devastation of a big loss. Forgive the pun here but life as a gambler is one big "poker face". So that will be my song offereing for you today. Can't read my poker face but nor should they have to.

Take care Stephen,.

Matt

Thankyou for posting on my diary Matt and congratulations as you approach 400 Days GF.

It seems the addiction can play with our emotions using guilt and remorse to get us back gambling. So many friends diaries tell of their inability to let go of the past and move on. You on the other hand have accepted responsibility for your actions but have than drawn a line under it, showing willingness to make a fresh start. My song choice today is a tribute to your recovery ...Don't Worry Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin ... Here's a little song I wrote, you might want to sing it note for note - Don't worry, be happy - In every life we have some trouble but when you worry you make it double.

Thank you Stephen for that, funnily enough I already have that on my play list, usually played when I am doing my man chores at home 🙂

I have accepted my past failures and although it has been difficult I believe I have made peace with it all. I will always have regret (who doesn't) but I can only change the present and the future now and I plan to.

Glad you are making progress still and life is turning the corner for you too. Enjoy it all, as life is a gift we all know this now better than most I would say.

Hi Stephen will use your song choice ad today's mantra! Am mega busy at work at the moment and focusing on the most relaxing festive season for a few years. Will have enough funds to cover and eon't be wasting time being ducked in by online slots. Thanks as always for your kindness and ongoing support S:)

Congratulations Stephen on reaching 175 days g.f.

I know that paying off debts can be soul destroying but can also be empowering. Although we have regret and anger for the money wasted, it's vital that we take ownership of the debt. It may seem like a life sentence paying it off, but in doing so - it will be a cleansing of the soul.

Perhaps in a similar way a criminal serves their time in prison. It just wouldn't be right for the court judge to simply let them off with a warning. That would represent a green light to repeat the crime. But let's not get too disheartened about paying off the debt. Sometimes the prisoner gets their sentence cut short for repentance and good behaviour!

Great thoughts there, Changemylife and, as always enjoying the song choices Stephen.

I always like to get my 'fix' on your diary Stephen; you attract a great bunch of people (modesty forbids me to suggest I'm one of them 🙂 !!!

Wishing you, and everyone, well. Five more days till your (takes deep breath): "One hundred aaaaannd ...."

Hi Stephen, just caught up on your diary and its inspiring to read you are forging ahead, and seem to be gaining a lot of hard won wisdom along the way. I've just had on Billy Ocean (song you dedicated to changemylife on 28/10) because I forgot how much I bleedin' LOVE B. Ocean...a great song to blow away the cobwebs and unhelpful urges, so thanks!

Thankyou Matt, Sharon, Changemylife, Mixer & 4D, appreciate your posts on my diary.

Congratulations 4D on 59 Days GF. From reading your diary I see you have a lot of highs and lows. The addiction is good at messing with our emotions. On bad days we need to just stick our heels in and commit to one day at a time, as Mixer recently wrote; "If your going through hell just keep going". My song choice today is by your namesake and reflects our hopes and fears...Haunted by Nadia Forde ...Nothing haunts us like the things that we don't say - We start to speak but but instead we turn and walk away - Living in hope, living in fear, I try to do what's right.

Morning Diary. Lovely sunny day.

Congratulations to our Sharon on 234 Days Gamble Free. Song choice today is ...Stretch 234(Feat Pharel) by Watch The Duck ...Shawty keep working - Gotta keep them bills paid - If you focus on what you want - You can have anything.

Aaah thanks Stephen, haven't posted much recently as have been flat out at work but got to pays those bills! Hope you're having a chilled weekend? Don't think much about gambling generally but have two bookmakers on the walk to work which sadly seem busy but have an air of sadness. If I can get to every bedtime GF all is well, take care and enjoy another GF day S:)

Thankyou Sharon. Hope your keeping ok and not working too hard. You have done so well addressing your gambling issues and I really respect your courage and determination.

It is sad to read of young people and compulsive gambling. Lives being ruined before they've even a chance to get started. My song choice today is ...Young, Dumb And Broke by Khalid ...Yeah, we're just young, dumb and broke - But we still got love to give.

Morning Diary. The sun is shining & today marks 180 Days GF.

No more the fool and no more gambling. Does this exonerate me from my past actions! I don't think so. What it does do though is show a positive intent to change my attitude and behaviour.

Will myself and others continue seeing the sad pathetic gambler or will the recovering addict be allowed to shine through?

My song choice today is ...Love Me Again by John Newman ...Now i'm rising from the ground, rising up to you - Filled with all the strength I found - There's nothing I can't do.

Hi Stephen super congratulations on 180 days! You've really turned things around and are such a support to so many here. Referring to work, to be honest I possibly am working too much but feel driven to dig myself out of the hole I've created. Enjoy this GF day, take care S:)