Here goes nothin :-)

Hi all

This is not getting any easier. I'm off work for another week and a half. Determined to keep busy. Not to gamble. I need to deal with this. I have a baby coming, in approx 21 weeks. A week Monday we find out what we are having 🙂 so excited! I don't want to lose the happiest time in my life to this bloody illness. I am in therapy, my one to one sessions have finished but still go to my group. I think contacting my therapist for some one to one time may be a good idea. God give me the strength to get through this.

Take care all,

Claire x

Hi Claire

Try not thinking about more than today. Just get through one day. Tomorrow never comes so don't worry about it. Get excluded from all gambling outlets and sites etc. Speak with someone on Netline for practical tips. It isn't easy but very worthwhile once you get it. don't beat up on yourself either. Please take care for your future family's sake!

Hi all

Thanks smiler. Getting through a day at a time. Tomorrow spending time with family, happy days.

8 sleeps til I find out if I get a pink or blue baby 🙂

Take care,

Claire x

Hi all

Good day today, kept busy, had visitors.

Today I did not gamble 🙂

Take care,

Claire x

Hi all

Another busy day ahead. Friends for coffee this afternoon and then going to a friends for tea later. Happy times. Today I am 20 weeks pregnant, half way there. Today, I will not gamble 🙂

Claire x

Hi all

Today is the day for my 20 week scan, happy times.

Gambling thoughts still haunting me but I am doing my best minute by minute, day by day to not give in. So many reasons not to give into it.

Take care,

Claire x

There are several reasons why we should not gamble but the most important one is yourself. Don't gamble for you. You deserve better in this world rather than a slave to a rotten addiction.

Hope everything goes well with the scan today. Happy days ahead!

Take care

Hi Claire

Just wanted to say well done on your progress so far. So many reasons for you not to give up the fight!

Hope all went well with the scan today 🙂

Hi all

Fed up, fed up, fed up!!! Trying hard and failing terribly. Exhausted with it all. Life is good so why now??? This has to stop.

Clare I have been as bad as yourself. If you look me up on Gamcare I have been around a good while and failing. I am 11 days today and quite simply I don't care how long I stay off as every day is precious in recovery(does not always feel like that) but my life has gone so badly with gambling (yet I think alot of how much better I was gambling). What I am saying it is better to try and fail than not to try at all.

Michael

Hi all

Thanks Michael. You're so right think I'd just lost sight. Someone on here once said to me that even if you have a relapse those days when you're gambling free, they're yours. No one can take them from you. So here I am day 1. Self exclusion from the local slot machine place, already self excluded from the bingo in November. I have so much to do this for, to succeed for. She's sat next to me gurgling away happily 🙂 family day today, films and pyjamas, staying on away from the cold and snow. Happy times 🙂

Take care all

Claire x

Hi Claire

Don't give up on giving up! You will get there in the end one day at a time and enjoy that day and live and flourish in it instead of trying to rack up big numbers. Quality over quantity!

Hi all

Looking forward to catching up and reading diaries on here. Time to regain focus AGAIN! Have been through so much these last 6 months,the loss of a pregnancy and ill health for which I've had treatment. I fell it was inevitable that my old 'friend' would return to see me through such a s**t time. It's and escape, its me time, time out etc. I'm not making excuses, I have a better understanding of my addiction after all this time. Therefore I know what I have to do and it always starts back here. Will be in chat at 8pm after I get my little treasure to bed to begin my journey back to not gambling. I want to be better, I need to be better. I can do this!

Take care all

Claire x x

Hi Claire

Glad you found your way back. Nobody is perfect although perfection is a trait followed by most CGs and yet we fall at the first hurdle. Get self excluded and move forward.

Take care

Thanks Smiler xx