Here we go.........

Hi Zally

You are coming over really positive day 21 that is some achievement and you will win today because you don't want to play

One day at a time

Best wishes Suzanne xx

WELL DONE

I want to say congrats on 21 days i have never got that far ever in my life so it's huge let me tell you..

I am sorry i m not posting much but i will, i just need to feel a little better in myself before i write lots in others diaries lol

CasinoRoyaloser

Just popped in to say my day has gone really well!

Must say though that I'm only on day 2 guys 🙁 I put day 2! this morning and i think my exclamation mark has been read as a number 1 lol.

The support here is mind blowing and i feel so much stronger today than i did just 48hrs ago. I think i needed my little blip to remind myself how pointless the online slots are and how idiotic gambling at all is. I may aswell flush a wad of notes down the toilet!

However give me 100 cash and i wouldnt be able to flush it down the loo, but give me 100 in my bank account and deposit it on any number of online sites and it instantly holds no monetary value any longer. It is such a worrying mindset and one i hope never to have again.

Heres to a successful day 2 and heres hoping i keep winning tomorrow and dont play through my third day 🙂

Thankyou for all your kind words and support it means so so much xx

Well done zally, the blip happenned... it was just that... the journey started 4 days ago... that one and only blip was part of the journey....

You are so right about the flushing of money.... no more flushing required.....

Today you dream.... tommorrow you live....

Dream alive

:):)

Well done zally, the blip happenned... it was just that... the journey started 4 days ago... that one and only blip was part of the journey....

You are so right about the flushing of money.... no more flushing required.....

Today you dream.... tommorrow you live....

Dream alive

:):)

Well its day 3 and i'm feeling good.

No urges really in fact quite the opposite - had some emails from sites this morning and i casually deleted them.

I know this is the honeymoon period and this weekend is going to be really difficult as this was often when i would do the most damage.

The one good thing about this weekend is it's my eldests 8th birthday on Monday so we have plans for saturday and sunday and for change we can actually treat him to lots of goodies instead of me trying to persudae hubby not to be too frivolous.

Heres to a winning day 3 looking forward to the future 🙂

Thanks to you all for the support this site has helped me turn a corner and hopefully i WILL stay on track.

Happy friday xx

Hi Zally

Doing good and moving forward and the sun is out going to be a lovely day especially as we are not going

Even spend one penny today on gambling

One day at a time

Best wishes Suzanne xx

Well i'm pretty much ready for bed as i've had such a tiring day at work so I can safely confirm I have completed my third day!!!!!

With it being a friday night i must admit i can fel those urges creeping up on me but i'm simply too tired to even think about them too much as I just want my bed.

Super busy day tomorrow so I'm hoping I can get through tomorrow clean too.

One thing I wish I could shake is this horrific headache - i'm assuming it could be related to this? I've taken as many painkillers as I can safely take but it simply wont shift. Hopefully a good nights sleep will help.

Glad I have a busy weekend ahead as it will take away on of my triangle pieces (time) but will also stop me fretting about my interview next week!! The nerves are starting already - which I know could trigger gambling urges too, so i need to stay busy busy busy all weekend and all week until Thursday (interview day). Its simply too easy to seek stress relief and solace in the slots but I WILL NOT PLAY!!!!!!!

Hoping everyone has had a good day 🙂 xxx

Well done zally keep strong... I know you can do this.... keep the shoulder devil under control... stay focussed on the goals....

Today you dream. .. tommorow you live....

Dream alive...

🙂 🙂 🙂

Hi zally

I have just sat and read thro your entire diary. I'm so pleased you chose to kick the habit before your family kicked you.

I've been married and now recently seperated from a CG as living with him became too much to take.

I too have 2 boys who are completely devastated over their dad's behaviour. Gambling takes you as a parent and removes all parental instincts which serve to protect your children in favour of that next bet.

You have now realised that you've missed out on sitting with your boys while they ate breakfast, but they would have noticed a long time ago that you had removed yourself from them.

Please enjoy every moment with them. Children are so precious and they see a lot more than we ever give them credit for.

I wish you strength on your journey from a total gamble free life and in doing so a stronger than ever bond with your boys x

Shelly

Thanks for your advice Shelley and yes the one regret I have above all others is neglecting my time with my children in favour of gambling. Luckily this hasnt been going on too long so I am keen to nip it in the bud for once and for all and move the hell on!

Early night did me good last night however here i sit whilst the rest of the house sleeps and i can feel those saturday urges coming........just a tenner..........you've earnt it!.................all the same as the last time i blipped and its day 4 again too.

I've never got past day 4 and i need this so badly so i can prove to myself that i can beat this.

My one safety net is that I know i have self excluded from pretty much everywhere and the blocking software on my pcs wont let me go on the sites anyway so right now this alone is keping me strong.

I will win today as I will NOT PLAY xxx

Isn't the blocking software just great. I can't even look at gambling sites as gamblock doesn't let me. I am happy its day 4 for you same for me too.

Keep strong were on the same amount of days too.

Well so far so good 🙂

Had a great day and even put myself in the firing line at the bowling alley when the kids wanted to go into the amusements - i looked at the bandits nearly fed some coins in but quickly tunred and fled and joined the kids on the motorbike games.

I felt good to supress the urge directly and it felt even better letting my hair down and having a fun time with the kids.

Theres still time in the day yet for me to mess up so I wont sing my own praises just yet, but I'll be damned if I let myself spoil this day.

Fingers crossed xx

Well done Lisa, the first few days are the hardest but if you can get through them the urges should fade.

Is the urge just to play (to get the buzz) or do you logically think to yourself that you can make a little bit of money?

My biggest problem was the roulette machine in the bookies, deep down i know i cant win (cos i cant stop) but i like (or should i say liked) my football bets just coz i thought i could predict winners and make a little bit of money. I was never ever conpulsive with anythin other than the roulette machine, i woultnt dream of puttin 40 quid on one football game or accumulator but wouldnt think twice of piling big bets on the screen just for the buzz of seeing my numbers come in. And if they didnt oh well you can just spin again, and again, and again... NOT GOOD!!

Hi sb thanks for your post, I must admit its both the buzz and the chances of winning some cash that entices me. Even though I know if i win I wont take my winnings I'll just keep playing until its all gone again.

One thing I did learn from my blip was that the closer to zero my balance gets the bigger the buzz. Its almost as if i'm addicted to LOSING money.

Like you said the online gambling is the most dangerous for me as money holds no value once its i'n "unit" form. However I have played the slots in the bookies but have never put more than ten pound in per visit - possibly because I'm female and the fellas in the bookies see me as a bit of a novelty I think lol so its not the most comfortable of places to linger in.

I also find the anonimity and privacy of gambling online part of my addiction. The urge to visit the bookies is halted by the worry that my addiction might become public. My gambling online it can be kept very much my dirty little secret.

This is why I know it must stop and so far I HAVE! I am now sat on the morning of my day 5 and feel as if I am grieving a lost part of me but also feel positive about the transition I am taking and the life I will get back.

Heres to a successful day 5 - good luck to all xxx