i absolutely love..... ....not gambling

hello dan, welldone for making the first positive steops, you will get lots of support on here. but dont get complacent, it is really hard . "addiction is the thief that comes in the night and steals your life" good luck and godbless

Well done Dan. Dito to everything. You need to have the strength and belief in yourself to fight this addiction. With the money I earn I should be living a fantastic life but I P***** it all away on gambling where there is only one winner in the long run.

This is my 3 rd day without gambling and I am quietly pleased with myself. I have put a block on internet sites on my computer so I just need to stop myself going in the bookies. Take one day at a time mate we are in this for the long run.

Jae

Hi an keep your spirits up. Time goes quicker than you think. Walking to the shops this morning I was remembering when my eldest daughter was born 32 yrs ago an wondering why I have been so selfish over the years with this gambling lark? and all the monies I have wasted. When I gambled I would feel guilty an spend money on credit cards to get them treats and spoil them cos I wanted to get rid of my guilt at the money an time spent.

But my daughter said the other day that those gifts tho nice werent as nice as when I would take them out to the park or sit with them an help make cards or just watching a nice weepy film together. It made me realise money isnt the bee all an end all of everything.

Money of course is important but dont let it mar any new memories you can make now you are not gambling. You can still do things together that dont cost a lot of money, picnics, go walking together, spend evenings together and yes planning for a new future. And one day when it all comes together you can look back and feel proud that YOU made a decision to have a better future with your wife and she obviously can see the other qualities you have that were marred by the gambling but once that is out of the picture,, she knows she can get back the man she married and you both deserve a new future an new memories which will come. xx

well done on your abstainence thus far 😉 if you had any doubts about fobt machines have a read on the overcoming page...theres some interesting info there !!! keep going you can do it 🙂

Hi Dan,

Welcome to the forum, really rooting for you.

One thing I would say, is that the first time I confessed, I was in 25k debt - the second (hopefully last) time and I was in nearly double. I thought things couldnt get worse but they can,

Keep on your toes mate and think what you may lose if you give in

Take Care

Blues

Many thanks everyone for your messages, had a rather depressing day at the bank today, I can by all accounts owe thousands to pay day loan companies at interest rates of 1800pc but can't afford repayments on a loan with 21.9pc ECM though I've been banking with the same bank for 18 years. I was there for 90 minutes, showed them every document I could etc etc, my wife joined me halfway through, then the assistant completed my application for a loan and the computer rejected it. I can understand that but what wa the point of letting me go through all that only to then complete an application I could have done myself from home?!! Aaarrgghh!

So the next few months are going to be even tougher but I've managed to pay one loan off today so that's £960 less than I owed this morning.

I'm just glad I no longer gamble. And there's no chance of complancancy this end. I'm just feeling very empowered by the I don't have a problem because I no longer gamble mindset. Massive urges still but I simply don't gamble anymore.

Thanks again everyone

thursday 2nd december 2010, my last gamble. I've been off work today, wife is out working and usually I would have wasted half my day by gambling, today Ive wasted it my watching murder she wrote.

to be honest I'm not sure which is worse!!! 🙂

no I have plenty of jobs to do and need to get cracking with those. Its time I started putting some discipline in place

need to list more things on an auction site as well. I hate doing it but if it brings in some money to pay off the interest on my massive debt then thats how its got to be.

I am getting fed up of seeing all the payday loan adverts on tv tho - It's such a bad practise and I wish it wasn't available they just prey on the vulnerable.

need to work out a budget for next motnh as well, there's no way that I'm going to be able to cover all my outgoings so we might have to take cash out on the wifes last credit card, just to see us through.

I have been doing that behind her back for the last couple of months but out of every £250-£300 withdrawn each time hardly any has actually reached our bank accounts. makes me feel desperate when I think about what Ive done.

I must remain in my positive mindset - I don't gamble anymore.

It's horrid to still have some of those thoughts creep in, perhaps just one more go - If I could turn £250 into £1000 then we'd be OK.

No it wont dan, you need to turn -£40k into +£1 and you ain't gonna be doing that on any machine that has a maximum win of £500!! you pratt!

sorry for anyone else reading this - I'm just trying to make myself think my inner thoughts out loud - somehow it seems to help me.

If I place £1 on a FOBT, split across two numbers and it came in I would win £36

cont'd sorry it would be £18

so then place £13.75 straight up and the rest on a split on the other number and if that wins I would have about £500

hit repeat and then watch the same number come in 80 times in a row. then and only then would you break even.

anyone know the odds on the same roulette coming in 80 times in a row!!!!??

cricky, thats scary, thats the odds I was effectively trying to play.

actually no it'd be even worse as if that happened I'd then probably take the whole wedge of money and try to land a straight up tricast in the 4:37 at brushwood. why oh why would you do this.

hi mate and welcome to the forum you have all the support in here not easy to come clean to your wife about your gambling problems take one day at the time

I have not had a bet or gamble in 6 years have no controll over my money have a sister who looke after for me it goes into her bank accout

you can get your self ban from bookies cansio and you can get gam block on your pc need to put up barries into place

don't know where you live they plenty of support groups around for you and for your wife to go to and meet people like yourself GA groups are very good or just come in here for support GA have a 24 hours chat room so you can chat live to some one 24/7 I will help you and give you any supoport you need

your friend stephen

stephen, 6 years, thats awesome and really good to see you posting here still, it certainly is encouraging to hear the positive story, alongside all our stories of relapses etc.

i do feel really good at the momnent in general and just had a text from my wife to say how much nicer ive been since confessing... more like when we first met. i cant began to tell you how good that text made/makes me feel.

so many reasons to never gamble again, so few, if any reasons to gamble.

thankfully, I don't gamble anymore!!!!

thanks again stephen and many congratulations on your turnaround

well I've just emailed my mum, I think thats the third time Ive confessed all to her but lets hope its the last!!!

I dont want to be a walking cliche but it does feel different this time!!!

hey dan

thanks for the diary post, it made my day.

just wanted to say firstly well done on admitting your addiction and secondly i really admire you are tackling it head on. setting targets and haivng aims isnt always the best in recovery but i feel you are now in a place where you can make positive progress on your addiction and your debt issues.

it may seem pretty crappy having to confess all but you had the balls to do it and that in itself is a massive plus on your part.

keep up the good work and stay strong. keep resisting the urges and you are always winning.

drop me and email if you like. [email protected]

all the best, lee

Hi Dan,

I'm keeping my eye on you as well, what strikes me about your posts early on, is that you are one of the determined ones, you really mean it this time.

It's a long road but we can do it my friend 🙂

Smokey

note to self: (start of mums emailed reply)

To say I am shocked and disappointed is a HUGE understatement but I just can't believe it has happened again. When I saw the heading I wanted to scream and scream and scream again. Instead I opened the message but just couldn't read it for several minutes. I felt sick and scared that it was all happening again and just couldn't believe it. **** even had to get me a brandy at 5 O'clock just to stop me throwing up. If you think ***** was hurt and upset she had nothing on me, except I suppose I should have know better. The fact that you could max out credit cards in her name is even worse and you should feel ashamed of doing that if nothing else.

As an extra to my post above, for anyone else reading this, I am so furtunate as my mum then goes onto talk about ways of support and reassures me that I'm still loved and care for by my family. So yes It is even more horrid for those around us than it probably is for even our inner most core but the dissapointment for family in particular is the deceipt. it is not so much about the gambling itself, so if you are hiding it then tell them, TODAY. I wish I had done months ago.

If you are reading this and thinking, well I dont have that much of a problem, still tell them - if you are trying to hide it, its probably because you have a bigger problem than you care to admit.

stay strong everyone.

i cannot win because i cannot stop.