i absolutely love..... ....not gambling

Forget about what you have lost, start thinking about what you will be able to save.

Just make sure that you are able to still treat yourself every now and again - small treats can sometimes be better than expensive ones.

Stay strong, and one day at a time, eh?

GT

Hi Dan.i reckon i could have about 12 of those porsches on my drive if i hadn't been a CG given the vast sums i have sqaundered,it is very hard to "let go" of the amounts we have lost,it is though very important to try to because part of our compulsion to gamble is based around chasing lost money:).No doubt you have a tough few years ahead on the financial front,we all do,in my case i have gone bankrupt Dan (best solution for me),have you looked at debt management plans run by (for example) cccs?,they may help you repay your debts whilst still having a sensible amount to live on,my advice would be not to push yourself to hard on the debt repayment schedule,that gives you the "headspace" to recover and rebuild all the other aspects of your life that the gambling has affected.

Best thoughts.

Seano.

Hey all, many thanks for the posts and encouragement from everyone.

I going to change my heading again as I know dreaming about what I could have had is the kind of dreaming that got me in this mess in hte first place.

Still I have broken through my first week of no gambling and it feels fantastic.

I am also looking at some sensible repayment options, only possible due to other believing in me and perhaps more importantly believing in my wife.

I have had a few days off work this week, just by coincedence but its been brilliant timing as Ive had a lot of time to reflect on what Ive done and more importantly what I need to do.

In a bizarre twist I am also really excited about looking at all my debts and working out how and when I can get them paid off.

I realise that this will provide me with the motivation I need to get to the stage of beingdebt free, but being debt free on a reasonable wage could be a massive danger in iteself so I am also looking at ways I can tackle the root cause, the wife has found a counsellor, close enough and far enough away to be a real possibility so I will look into that more and try to tackle the two issues alongside each other.

Also have an opportunity arising within work, will be an underdog but have a slim chance of opening quite a big door for my future, so that will keep my interest at work for the next 1-2 years again great timing really

And for anyone reading this many many thanks again for any messages of support and for your interesting and thought provoking diaries.

I really do hope that everyone on here can stay gamble free until the new year....

Thankfully, I no longer gamble.

I cannot win because I cannot stop, therefore I wont start.

thanks again everyone

Hi and ditto one week gone already yay! and like u feeling good. Lets keep that feeling going and we shall be fine. Especially with such a supportive wife you will do great.

Glad u so positive and I believe we can do this. Lets stay strong. Jan x

well done on a weeks bet free dan 🙂 i liked your post about reasons of gambling....cant expect you to read all my diary mate...thanks for dropping in though...youve actually given me an idea,maybes start a new diary with brief update...stay strong dude,we can do this 🙂

cant believe its been over a week already, cant wait to post thats its been a year......

Hi Dan

Congratulations mate on over a week without a bet.. Keep doing what you are doing and watch them weeks turn into months..

Well done, keep it going

Thanks also for your posts on my diary, very much appreciated.

Enjoy the rest of the weekend

All the best..

many thanks for your comments everyone, I keep thinking of little scenarios and have to catch myself... work raffles... a football accumalator (ive only ever placed four and have won twice, with very small stakes) and football correct scorer/results.... again hardly ever do them but now that I am not gambling its amazing how often you see/hear the advertising - its everywhere, especially as I follow so much sport

still not anywhere near tempted enough to actually place a bet, thankfully and am still looking into seeking some professional 1-2-1 advice/ counselling.

yet again my amazing wife and family are supporting me in managing my debt and are very positive that I need to and can find the money to pay for any counselling.... I guess in comparison.. well there is no comparison, counselling should help me save money in the future

A question for anyone reading this... what moments can you remember as your biggest regrets? if you dont mind sharing I'd love to hear you describe your feelings during those moments.... I really do find these stories so helpful as I can related to so many different tales.

For me my worst ever bet was my first two, I placed them at the same time, one 50p e/w on a greyhound.... after my 9pence tax, it cost me £1.09 and I won back 74p and at the same time I bet on the football, Mohemet Scholl I think his name was to score first and B munich to win 3-1. The result happened and I won £145 for my 50p double,, not bad when I was only on £90 a week.

Probably my biggest odds busting win with my joint first bet. Its also the bet I regret the most, I wish I hadnt won.

The second for me would be when I had about £1500 of debt and then in one day I was £1900 up when I left the bookies - I had been about £2500 up at one point.

I was leaving with £2000 and at the very last second I put a bet on the greyhounds, £100 straight up on 4-1-3 tricast.

4 beat 1, 3 was beaten into thrid place, in a photo finish by 2

I swear this is true but the 412 tricast paid out about 80/90-1, trap 2 was the favourite, trap 3 the massive outsider (10-1) - I reckon the tricast would have around 160/170-1 maybe a bit more

I remember it all as clear as day, I had been backing 4-1-3 all day - just something I used to do.

I can also clearly remember the sick feeling, if you know it a bit like in lock, stock, when the room spins and you go off in a daze.

I rationalised in my mind that I had been really unlucky but it was Ok as I was still back in the black.

For two days anyhow, after which all the winnings had been put back and some.

I really dont understand the mentality of what I did and thats definately something I need to get out, hopefully through some pro help.

Either way as I type this, I sure am glad to have given up gambling.

I cannot win because I cannot stop.

Hi Dan

I'm glad that you are still staying strong and staying gamble free. With your wife's support I'm sure you will get over this.

You were asking about what moments I regret. I would say, the moment I regret is in 2003. My daughter was not even a year old. My parents offered to babysit while my husband and I go out to the movies. It was Christmas Eve. Instead of going out to the movies we end up gambling. We end up losing everything we had in the bank and took out some money from the credit card and didn't go back home until the 26th. We missed my baby's first X'mas. Until now, every time I remember that moment, it makes me want to cry. The only thing I'm thankful for is that my daughter don't remember that.

I will always regret that moment. I would never be that person again...

I hope that you continue to stay strong and beat this addiction.

Vegas

Hi. My biggest regret has to be the period when my father was really ill. I had got on the bus to go to town to buy him some books and then intended to visit him. Did get the books but had to pass the Arcade and hey presto no visit to my dad.

Obviously did visit him again but that day I remember my mum saying how lonely he was as she was at work and there was me in the Arcade more concerned with pressing a button an mesmorised by flashing lights.

He passed away a few weeks later and I shall never (and dont deserve to either!!!!) forgive my selfishness. This was over 24 years ago an you would think the guilt would have made me stop.

But it actually did the opposite as whenever I get stressed or a big event is iminient I would head for the arcades or later on in my life, the online fruities.

But so glad you are staying strong and the Counselling is VERY IMPORTANT as I posted myself that even playing on the free site altho not losing any money, in my head I was still gambling so was certainly nowhere near cured as it just made me realise the urge was still there.

Something clicked in my head (the Miss Sensible side for a change!!) and realised this was utter madness to even play for free as dangerous and would activate Miss Nutter who would end up back at square one.

My first posting I put down that I can stop for a few months at a time but its the REASON why I want to gamble that needs addressing and replacing the adrenaline rush with something else and looking out for the dangerous signals that trigger that urge.

So stay strong addicted an the counselling? a sure bet!!! and one that u will come out off as a true winner. Take care Jan x

more debts under control as of today thanks to my amazing family. Now starts the long hard slog of repaying every penny

Hi Dan

I have had so many bets that i regret there is not one that stands out.

I've had some good winners in accumilators etc but the money was always gone straight away as my bets got bigger and more often.

My biggest regret is having to put my family through what i'm putting them through, they don't deserve it.

Glad to see you are getting your debt sorted and stay strong mate, i've now gone a month and feel so much better for it.

Hi an nice to read your posts are sounding more positive. Stay strong. Gl Jan x

well still not gambling and fast approaching two weeks.... funny though i keep finding myself daydreaming about gambling, only for a split second or two but its still in there

looking forward to seeking some pro help in the new year

Also a massive, huge thank you to anyone who has posted on my diary. I ll be honest, i love any comments and the support is a great feeling