I will never win because I cannot stop

Husky - when you had not added anything to your thread I was 99% sure it was because you were gambling. Having been on the site for a long time it's a real sign when people don't post that it's because they are gambling. Often they don't post if they go on a winning run and only come back once that inevitable loss occurs.

I realise more now that it's no use just telling people to stop - if you could you would. However intermingled with the sympathy and encouragement there has to be a reality check. If I offend you I apologise but if I don't say it I am doing you a disservice. You are very elequant with your words but I don't think you can do this on your own - you need the support of a professional so please consider this. You are not just relapsing on a regular basis but losing huge sums when you do and almost brushing it under the carpet by saying 'I'm alright now'.

We can encourage you and dare I say many will write just what you want to hear to help you dismiss the seriousness of the loss but you should consider that professional help. Seeking help is not a weakness, quite the opposite.

I wish you well with whatever you decide my friend.

Dave

Slips are inevitable but there is some benefit if we learn from them. Personally I would question have access to that kind of cash at such an early stage. Gamblers - including myself - are masters of excuse making as well.

I'm going to remedy that situation by giving my cards back to my partner. There is no need for me to carry them.

Very true DeLorean - I think the key is 'if we learn from them'. Also agree that access to money, especially larger sums is too tempting.

I've had enough relapses now to question if I am learning from my mistakes. The only way I can prove I have learnt a tough lesson is to stay off FOBT's/roulette over a sustained period of time. I am genuinely battling this and I realised at the start that it would be a long road full of pitfalls. I'm on the right road but still falling into them, albeit each time a bit further down the road!

I'm going to try something different to motivate myself this time. Im going to post the last amount I lost gambling beside the number of days I'm gamble free in the hope that seeing that loss will keep me motivated.

£700.00 Day 0

I just read your thread and it seems to me you haven't really let go of your losses yet?

I'm not sure it will be helpful for you to keep posting how much you've lost... "Day 0 = £700" etc.

Personally, the only way I've managed to stay clean is to let go of the huge amount of money I've lost and write it off psychologically. Start fresh today. Let go the past.

Who wants to be the man that pays for the bookmaker to sit by the pool in his massive carribean villa laughing at our silly calculations? Don't start, don't let him buy another cocktail at our expense...

Yes I agree, I'm not sure have £700 staring in your face every day is going to help much. But everyone feels differently about these things.

Day 1 on the path again. Each time I've fallen off the wagon I've learnt something about myself particularly my triggers when it comes to gambling. I need to keep my mind occupied as gambling creeps into my thoughts when I've too much spare time. I also have a tendency to do it when I'm stressed or feeling uneasy as in the past it was a coping mechanism when aspects of my life weren't going right. Today is a new day. I'm not going to dwell on past mistakes anymore but just move on and think positively about my situation. I've played a risky game for far too long and it hasn't paid dividends. It's time to play safe from now on and not gamble. My recovery begins today. I can't change my past but I can change my future.

Husky - when you had not added anything to your thread I was 99% sure it was because you were gambling. Having been on the site for a long time it's a real sign when people don't post that it's because they are gambling. Often they don't post if they go on a winning run and only come back once that inevitable loss occurs.

I realise more now that it's no use just telling people to stop - if you could you would. However intermingled with the sympathy and encouragement there has to be a reality check. If I offend you I apologise but if I don't say it I am doing you a disservice. You are very elequant with your words but I don't think you can do this on your own - you need the support of a professional so please consider this. You are not just relapsing on a regular basis but losing huge sums when you do and almost brushing it under the carpet by saying 'I'm alright now'.

We can encourage you and dare I say many will write just what you want to hear to help you dismiss the seriousness of the loss but you should consider that professional help. Seeking help is not a weakness, quite the opposite.

I wish you well with whatever you decide my friend.

Dave

Just saw your post Dave and appreciate all your points and must say I agree with all of them. I write well but that is not enough and I need to back it up with positive action. I realise there are support networks out there but genuinely believe that this is something I have to master on my own. I feel only then will I genuinely get on top of the problem. I know it's not for everyone and I appreciate that my behaviour to date has not reflected what I have written. I won't make excuses for what's happened and I appreciate all feedback, no matter how cutting it is. My situation can't be dismissed frivolously and I realise that I have a long path ahead but I believe that the majority of my gambling stemmed from it being a form of escapism. It was never for the money. I did it to take my mind off negativity in my personal and private life. I have reached this point in a very short space of time and that has made me wake up to the dangerous situation that I am in. I will beat this. I am sure of that. I can be determined when I want to be and my situation had moved from wanting to stop to needing to stop. Thanks for all the feedback and I agree with lack of posting being linked to gambling relapses. That's why I aim to keep posting a regular activity.

Pps I am not looking any pats on the back or sympathy on here. I post because I want the advice of people who have walked in my shoes. I approach each day with honesty and appreciate that at times hard truths are needed. I am not the type of person who needs a shoulder to cry on. I respond to criticism and that motivates me to prove my doubters wrong. I have a conpetive edge and I'm willing to learn. I am in the midst of a real battle here and don't want to be sitting on the sidelines. I will prove I can do this. Time will tell.

Day 2

There's no second chances. Seize the day. I will not gamble today.

Day 3

My rehabilitation continues. It's Day 3 and I will not gamble today.

Day 4

I'm not there yet but I am closer than I was yesterday. I will not gamble today.

Day 5 and an early start.

I don't need gambling in my life anymore. I'm tired of lining the pockets of others with money I worked long hours to earn. I refuse to be drawn back into the murky world of gambling. I will not gamble today!