Yesterday was the day it all came crashing down.... I'm 35 and gambled for all of my adult life, I was a croupier for 5 years from 18, so should have known better.
It all started as fun, then became an escape. It's been bad for a couple of years now, but the past 9 months have been the worst. My partner and I have been saving to move house, we argued, I gambled, I saved extra to try and replace it, I was secretive, we argued, I gambled, you get the picture.
It wasn't just that, I'd gamble recreationally every weekend, quite often win on a football bet, worst thing to ever do if it was online as it would all be gone on blackjack within 10 minutes, and then I'd spend more to try and win what I'd lost.
So yesterday it all came to a head when I had to admit that all the money was gone, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Luckily my partner was incredibly understanding and yes, is angry, but most of all is supportive. I wish i'd never let it get this far. We're going to talk at the weekend about the best way to deal with it and get back on track going forward. But already I feel 100% better about everything and am determined that this is the turning point.
I've not actually gambled for over a week, and not a large amount for a few weeks, I've been aware for some time that I've had a problem and was hoping I wouldn't have to involve my partner, but I'm glad I did as she's being incredible.
I know my story id the same as thousands others, so thanks for taking the time to read this. I'd appreciate hearing from people in the same situation.
Don’t know what I was thinking. On the way home, went in bookies. Only spent a tenner but I feel sick!
Hi
I think we all feel the relief when we finally get tell Partners and famly or should I say get caught out in most cases.
The fear of getting caught out is lifted, the lies can stop, the tears and angers are being dealt with , we feel so much better we put plans in place , arrange to see a counsellor sort out our debts. things are getting better.
But for me this is the most dangerous time and im sure for others as well , I was rock bottom only 2 weeks ago told family sorted all the things out and suddenly life feels better ,so why on the way to the counseller for the first time this week do I go into the bookies and gamble the months bills away ?
I went on to see the counseller and did admit this to him , he seems like he has seen it all and looking forward to next session.
All im saying telling people and stopping the lies can be very short term unless we truely want to stop.
Today thats me the thought of being in that dark place is not something I want.
You can do this KW but really want it and your life will be amazing without gambling.
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