My Diary - Restarted Fri 10 Sep 2010

Day 15 Of My Recovery :

First thanks for all your support Stumper,Jeff , Aberdeenlad, Curly, and others. Helps so so much!! No time yesterday really to spend here. Over my head in work and the same today. Massive project on that has a deadline of 6pm tonight so will be working to the wire today. Really wanted to spend some time here yesterday , didnt even make chat as crashed at 8.30pm. No thoughts of gambling really yesterday, went for a walk to the shop to get some stuff and was thinking. In the past when gambling how the hell did I find the time ? I mean some times I would gamble for hours , somtimes on and off all day. Work suffered terribly - family hardly saw me. I was not a good dad or husband. But that time where did it come from how did I manage to cut it into my day ? The past few days I have needed 25 hours a day to try fullfill work commitments but with gambling we always find the time at the expenses of everything else. How good I was at making excuses for myself in order to clear my way to be able to gamble.

Today I will NOT gamble. Onwards. and hopfully later tonight I want to catch up with how you lot are doing and read up on your diarys. Stay strong all and thanks again for your support!! Onwards Bet free Blocked

Hi blocked out,

Just wanted to say thank you for your post of support.

I looked at the start date of your diary and was surprised to see it was similar to mine. I didnt realise that! I avoid getting overly involved in newer diaries, because I feel you cant read all of them and support everyone. I thought you were 'newer' than that for some reason, which is why I dont keep up to date with yours.

Im going to read up on your story, as I have lost connection with many of the people I bonded with on here and its a shame. I think some people just move on.

Anyway take care,

f x

Hi Blocked.

Cheers for the post on my diary mate.

Don't feel embarrassed about your latest lapse mate. There are a lot of people on here willing to support you mate. This support is unconditional as far as i am concerned.

Truth be told Blocked i want you to succeed more than anyone else on here. I can sense the pain you are in when reading your diary. Thing is though Blocked you have shown that you can do this. If you have gone a year gamble free then you can go gamble free forever.

Keep trying Blocked. Never quit quitting. You can do this.

Blocked

Just got back from Ireland.

Hope everything is ok with you mate.

Stumper

Morning Blocked,

You've been very quiet. How are you?

Jas x

Day 20 of my Recovery :

Hello all have not been able to get here the past few days - work over load and quite a few flights. Im currently out of the UK working. Had a horrible flight / landing last night really shook me up 🙁 Extreme weather and well rather bumpy landing 😉 But at least got down in 1 peice. Will catch up with everythng all here over the next 24 hours. Thanks all for checking in on my and making posts to my diary - it really is appreciated. Still here and onwards. Blocked.

Day 20 of My recovery part 2 :

d**n casinos and there emails! Just got a mail through from a casino where I was at one time a "vip" should have been "viL" = Very important looser 😉 Anyway been following the cr@P they send me 20% on this or that deposit. I have not bitten. Today the % they are offering is huge. Only becuase they have seen I have not gone back an gambled with them for almost 3 weeks now. I have tried a number of times to remove my email, get account closed etc - no Joy. So much for responsible gaming eh. Makes me mad that cant they see some People have REAL problems with gambling and they should respect those people who request NO COMMUNICATION. Anyway using my anger to ensure no way will they get 1 penny of me. Rant over just had to get that of my chest. Out to the shops now ... buying food Not scratch cards 😉 Blocked.

well done for not biting blocked. . Thats nasty and intimidating stuff mate. . You should be proud of yourself though. Keep up the good work. You can do it. We all can. .

Well done Blocked - while it may seem tempting to take them up on their offer, and maybe have a few 'free' bets or whatever - there is the chance that this may lead to a place that you simply do not want to re-visit.

Just after the turn of the year, one high street bookmaker sent me an e-mail saying that it had deposited £100 into my account, which I could do with what i wanted. I could have gone into my account, withdrawn it straight away, and closed the account. But guess what - I lost the 'free' £100, and went on to lose more of my own money. Bookies know that you will accept their free bets, and go on to lose your own money. It's disgusting, really, when you think about it. So well done for not giving into them. Glad to hear you got back in one piece after the bumpy flight!

Alan

Hi Alan yep well they want it to tempt into re-depositing. As you found out with the freebie from the bookies - it worked exactly as the bookmaker wanted. And thanks yes in 1 peice glad im not up in the air today 😉 thanks for the message. Blocked.

Blocked--glad that you have landed save mate, both on the ground and in the gambling department.

Stay strong

Stumper

Hi Blocked

The free bet emails etc are appauling. I even lost the plot over a repeat self exlusion this week. One firm say they can no longer accept S.E. over the phone or email and require a 4 page form filled in and signed and proof of ID!!!! Its an outrage! I was furious.

Still we need to keep the demons at bay!

Eyes X

Hi Eyes , yep it is and in the coming months many of the lesser so called "legit" operations will be doing even more to keep what ever players they can. There is a huge sh@t storm in the offing regarding a massive issue with credit card transactions. When it blows its gonna blow the lid right off. Its going to be interesting to watch from the sidelines to say the least. Demons still at bay 😉 thanks for the reply Blocked.

I am intrigued by your last post blocked! something about credit card transactions...do you refer to them in general, or to your own circumstances?

Just being nosey...like the term sh@t storm 😉

Congrats on your continued abstinence,

f x

Day 21 Of My Recovery :

Managed to get through the first 48 hours or so while im working away this week without having any real urges to gamble. Being away has been in the past when I have gambled harder than at other times. For some reason yesterday was easy. On the financial front it remains a night mare and somthing I need to work through. It depresses me when I look back at what I have done. I wish I could have stopped this time last year (i thought about it) but didnt.

Thanks all for the continued support & replys here - its always very much appreciated. Freda Hi, I dont really want to open a discussion on this here as its probably not the right place - but in breif there is a huge aquiring bank which processed millions in gambling transactions many of which were "hidden" this same bank is facing massive fines in the region of 10s of millions from the card assosications and could well loose its ability to process. Some of the reports are public knowledge, some I know becuase of loose connections related to work. But it is going to put the spotlight directly onto high risk gaming transactions.

Onwards to the next day gamble free. Blocked.