My first diary!

Hi Flagg. I really appreciated your posts and you know I have always appreciate any advice and support you have offered. And I feel really gutted that I'm having to come on here and confess that I have had a lapse. I feel a part of something here and it helps to have this support.

I have decided to leave the Xmas thread. It's a horrible decision and one I wish I didn't have to make. When I gambled I regretted it and had planned on confessing up straight away and would've continued on with thread but unfortunately I didn't get chance to log on to the site and wasn't strong enough to stop so for me it's not just a slip and that's the reason id like to leave the thread as it just wouldn't feel the same. I will continue to support the thread and be keeping an eye on you all and wishing you all the best. I still think there a great idea and a big help and look forward to the next one. On that note the Cheltenham thread sounds like a great idea and I'm sure would be a massive help to us both and many others.

Thanks again for all the support, I do feel sad to be leaving the thread behind but I'll be first in line for the next one.

alright flagg

Carl

Good Evening Diary,

Day 225 - Tough day on the forum it's always bitter sweet reading about a slip. Obviously the slip is the downside but I think it takes great character to get back here immediately. So many slip and never return those who do should take great heart from their own strength.

I would not want to put too much pressure on myself but I really do get a great deal out of supporting others. I worked in the voluntary sector for quite some time supporting people. Gambling took me out of there if im honest. It took over and I stopped doing what I was good at. I almost feel I can give something back here. Not directly as people have to progress themselves ultimately but if I can just do bits to help them along I feel happier.

On that note, I have a few plans for the coming months in terms of threads and hopefully giving people a focus. I also have a really huge idea which people can read about very soon. Certainly a take it or leave it thing but I will be giving it a go!

So, today I feel exceptionally strong in my recovery. I feel I have a control and why? because I avoid the fight. I don't fight my demon, I live with it!

Day 225 - Why Fight?

Flagg,

Thanks for the post on my diary as always your comments are lovely.

I loved reading your post today and I think your last paragraph was fabulous. I haven't realised until now but you are correct I don't fight the demon I learned to live with it.

Great work on the 225 days.

Tomso.

Flagg,

Thanks for the post on my diary as always your comments are lovely.

I loved reading your post today and I think your last paragraph was fabulous. I haven't realised until now but you are correct I don't fight the demon I learned to live with it.

Great work on the 225 days.

Tomso.

Yo,

Picture this you and me sitting in together( Vitually )

Munching on a double decker , living in harmony with our addiction.

I agree with you one million percent donor fight it . Me personally recon you can not win that fight . Just learn to live with it .

But hay you knew that already lol

2 x double deckers on ice

Shiny xxxxxx

Hi Flagg,

Nooooooooooooooo! an icecream van lol

Thank u 4 making me laugh in chat, it is always good 2 chat 2 u 🙂

I agree with ur last post!

U r doing brilliant. U r inspirational even with ur check slippers lol 🙂

Have a gr8 nite xx

Good Afternoon,

Day 226 - It is interesting how some days are much easier than others on this journey. Reading a few posts from people who have had slips in the past and they often say how they thought they had it cracked. Long periods of calm, no thoughts, no urges. I guess that's why this is an addiction though, a lifelong battle because it can just lie dormant for periods of time.

We can regain a certain control but the secret is to remain in control. Don't let your guard down, don't get complacent and you can continue having these 'easy days'.

It isn't a magic formula but the steps you can take to make it easier as I have said many times are simple and more importantly manageable. By putting them in place it can seem pretty magical. A life of control without too many worries, without too many urges, not magic, but pretty close.

Day 226 - Unearthing the 'Magic'

flagg

Carl

I dont think you did know that martin 🙂

Yes i have heard about the film a car that was mad lol..

Great post from you today as well my friend.

Keep working that magic, slippers or not lol .

Blondie x

Just re read your post to me and although I read it yesterday and it helped I think I was in a bit if a daze still and only now after re reading it i can take it on boards. The idea of being two people makes sense, ive done a lot of very irrational things when I was my second self. I just hope I can remember all the advice when I need to - I guess I'll be feeling a bit fragile for a while. But the strength is still there just taking a back seat for a bit. Roll on next week and I'll be flying once more - I hope.

Hey Mate,

Really well done on where you are now mate with your road to recovery.

Just about my post ye I didn't really celebrate too much because I hit 6 months before and slipped and that is why I hit rock bottom and got out of control because I gambled so much after that slip and ended up in so much debt which I am paying back now.

So to get this far again is really god but I am just scared I will slip again. So I am trying to keep busy and get past this so I can stay on the road to recovery. Thanks for the post mate catch up soon .

Stay strong and hope you having a good week.

Ricky 🙂

Morning Diary,

Day 227 - Not managed an early post like this for a while. Probably because there isn't a great deal to say.

I know one thing for sure I won't be gambling today. Infact I read a post the other day from someone who said I know I will be ok until January 2nd!

By taking it one day at a time I wouldn't usually recommend saying something like that. However, i have thought a few times there is a date in my head which I'm pretty confident I will reach. The work will come after that ensuring I keep the same focus I have now.

I still take it one day at a time though so for the purposes of my diary and my own peace of mind I will keep that date to myself until it comes and goes.

Day 227 - Looking Forward

Good Morning Flagg

Well done m8 on reacing day 227 you going great guns and know what you mean about knowing you not gamble like I am a novice compared to you only on day 72 but havent been interested in gambling at all enfact when I see online site or walk past the bookies I feel sick almost like a reformed smoker feels about smoking I guess. Think I will make the new year as well with the help of your great thread

I had a canidate call to my door asking me to vote for his party the other day did he get an ear full lol I asked why is it illegal for someone under 18 to step foot in a bookies but all of the gambling adverts are show before the 9pm watershed as this is surley encouraging the next generation of gamblers (the bookies are no fools) his answer was people gamble for fun god if only he knew the truth needless to say I not be voting for that party 🙂

Hugh

hi flagg

carl