[Closed] My Last Bad Day

A CARROT! 

Smile - well done!

My favourite joke, sad of me hai.

Your doing well drama, believe in yourself like lots on here believe in you. 

S****y times pass

I transferred some money from Hubbies account to my account so I could gamble but now they want a code and I cannot for the life in me remember the code. I am so mad that I can't remember the code! That is all. 

Heres the Da Vinci code - 

The general rule that produces the Fibonacci sequence is that each number after the second 1 is equal to the sum of the two previous numbers. So 1+1 = 2, 1+2 = 3, 2+3 = 5, and so on.

The code to gamble isnt gonna help. 

I have not gambled. I tried really hard to. I got frustrated and called the National Gambling Helpline and a lady talked me down from it. I am off to bed. I will be happy about this all in the morning. 

That was a big moment Drama. Getting through your gambling urge. Proud of you. ?. Hoping you got some sleep. 

Merry Christmas lovely lady x

Well done, Drama!

I wonder about why you chose your name. Do you think you are over-dramatic? Thing is, I think it's fine to be dramatic, if we have been through a lot. I used to constantly lurch from one drama to the next. Things are usually less dramatic, these days. I learned though, that I was never really dramatic, I was just in pain and hadn't really been loved very well. 

All of those "dramatic" feelings are valid and understandable. If we haven't been loved very well, early on - I don't know your story but this is usually what causes us to have drama in our lives - we put up with more than most people would, from unhealthy people because love feels like a scarce resource. If we get kind of loved by someone, it feels like progress, a positive. Getting attached to someone who only kind of loves us, in a "meh" type of way can bring us to our knees.

I married someone who was half-a**ed a lot of the time, I was constantly anxious that he would leave me or that he was going off me. When he did leave, 9-10 years in, it felt like I was literally dying. I'd attached to him in a dependent way, like a child.

Anyway, sorry If this is all barking up the wrong tree and you're just a drama teacher, or something, hahaha!

I just got up. 

Presents opened. Bird in the oven. 

I am happy. 

I do create drama's Freda. That's why I chose the name. 

Happy Christmas All. 

D x

What's the difference between bogies and sprouts? 

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Children will eat bogies!!! 😀 

What's the most popular Christmas wine?

'But I don't like Brussels sprouts!'

Please come back to chat. His comment was out of order 

Posted by: Murlo

Please come back to chat. His comment was out of order 

No. I've actually had a good day. It's the second time today he's been harsh. I don't wanna get wound up and be up trying to gamble again. I am fine. Honest. I'm just avoiding triggers. It's for the best. 

Drama x

Completely get that Drama. Glad you are ok. Just so not want one person to ruin things for you. You did amazingly well last night. Love you x

Christmas Day. 

We stayed in bed till half past midday. It was nice. I actually like my Pooh Bear now. I've brought him downstairs for Christmas day. I know I sound like a kid but having a bear is a comfort thing and we all have to nurture our inner-child. So I'm nurturing mine. 

I am embarrassed about trying to gamble last night. I am embarrassed about crying at this lass on the helpline out of frustration. I was purely annoyed that I couldn't get through my blocks but as predicted, today I am very happy that sober and right-minded me put them in place. I am also appreciative of the support I've had this holiday season. From everyone really. 

I opened my presents when Hubby came down. 

Christmas Haul. 

A Yankee Candle. 

A Where's Boris Book. It's like Where's Wally but with Boris Johnson. Very funny!

A Pokemon mug with my name on it. This was from Secret Santa. Whoever it was must really like me to get summat so thoughtful. 

I got 6 bottles of real ale from my Boss. It's a shame I don't like none of them. They are all like Bitters but he must thing I like them cos I drink in a real ale pub. Not my cuppa tea but I won't tell him. 

I had a bath and took the dog up the park. I played Pokemon. I say my friend who I affectionately call Uncle B. I couldn't give him a hug cos he had a dog and mine is not sociable but we got to talk and say Merry Christmas so that was lovely. 

I came home and watched the Queens Speech. I love her. God Bless Her Majesty. 

Then I did dinner. We had Chicken, Gammon, Roast Potatoes and Carrots. Stewed Sprouts. Gravy, Yorkshire Puddings and Apple Sauce and Stuffing. It was lush. 

I just steamed Hubby a Christmas Pudding and Custard but I don't like Christmas Pudding so I've cracked open the Celebrations. I'm not gonna have too many cos I don't wanna get wired on sugar and be up late. 

Oh, I forgot. I called my Dad when I went to the park. I didn't lie. I just said I'm hungover and don't believe I'll be good company today. Would you mind if I called tommoz? He said no, that's fine. So I'll visit them tommorow. I hope my Mum's in a good mood. 

I am watching some telly and then going up to bed. 

Oh, and I ordered that Ant Middleton book from Amazon. So that's all my stuff either fixed or replaced barring the Crib and I reckon I'm gonna have a bash at making one. I love craft projects so that will be something nice to do. I never put my Crib away you know. I have it up all year round. I miss it. 

That will do for now. 

G'nite Gamcare folks. 

Drama 

xoxoxo

Hi Drama,

I always read your diary, it's a really good read - raw, honest, with that underlying spark and humour. (There are no flies on you!)  Glad that you weren't unduly tilted by the curveball comment on Chat earlier ... We all had your back, Ok.

Here's wishing you a relaxing Boxing Day.

Mixer